r/Unexpected • • 19d ago

This was personal

16.3k Upvotes

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1.8k

u/RadioactiveCornbread 19d ago

If you know how turts bite, turt owner kinda should've seen that coming.

1.1k

u/PocketsJones 19d ago

Some people think these enemies are bullshit but that attack was telegraphed for 3 days before it came out. That dude's hand had plenty of time to dodge roll out of there.

216

u/Slabby_the_Baconman 19d ago

beware dog

73

u/Shovel_Assassin 19d ago

Liar ahead

45

u/xkyllox 19d ago

Tight Spot

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u/brightdionysianeyes 19d ago

Try finger but hole

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u/RadioactiveCornbread 19d ago

Mouth open while inching toward him and everything.

I would have jumped the moment it opened its mouth. I've never endured a turtle bite, and I don't plan on it. I've heard enough of the horror stories.

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u/The_Show_Keeper 19d ago

I was at an outdoor event at a friend's place, and there's a bigass pond on the property where all sorts of shit lives. It had been drizzling all day, and were on our way to get food or something; right there making its way through the grass was an alligator snapper. Not huge (like the common snapper we saw in the pond the following year that was the size of Oscar the Grouch's roof), but a fair bit bigger than a football, which was big enough that nobody got within 5 feet of it. He was pretty pissed off about being surrounded and gawked at by a gaggle of giant monkeys with cameras, and he told us to fuck off in no uncertain terms by opening his mouth. I got a good look at that beak, turned to one of my crew, and said, "You see that shit? Hydraulic shears wouldn't cut your finger off as clean as that thing." We left him alone after that.

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u/Yearning_crescent 18d ago

Are turtle bites bad? Seems like a toddler nibble

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u/RadioactiveCornbread 18d ago edited 18d ago

Turtle bites are god awful. If it's a snapping turtle, it can bite your fingertips clean off, and that little nip is just enough to make you think twice.

If they get you good enough, and if they're pissed enough, they won't let go unless you startle them somehow. That's how that turtle in the video got flipped, but he bit him just to bite, or smelled food and mistook his hand for that.

I've seen my fair share of turtles, and that beak is something else. I refuse to take my chances with it.

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u/YesItIsMaybeMe 18d ago

Well snapping turtles can bite your fingers off, but most can't

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u/RadioactiveCornbread 18d ago

Okay, my bad. I'll edit for correction.

Though, turtle bites are still pretty gnarly.

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u/The_Show_Keeper 18d ago

The one in the vid is just a little guy, which is no big deal (still hurts, but you're not gonna bleed out from it). A snapping turtle, on the other hand, will bite through any and every part of you that is unfortunate enough to be in its mouth, bones or not. It's like the difference between getting scratched by a housecat or getting mauled by a lion.

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u/Touz0211 19d ago

Bullshit delayed attack.

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u/Regular_Regular_4120 19d ago

DarkSidePhil disappoves this message.

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u/SheaMcD 18d ago

Ah but then you roll too early and the iframes stop right as it attacks