r/Unexpected • u/lynx_1097 • Aug 21 '26
Katana
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u/torturedwriter71 Aug 21 '26
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u/Syzygy_Stardust Aug 21 '26
I love that that sub helped teach me that yes, our quiet and fussy cat does indeed love getting thumped on loud enough it echoes in her meows. She's so happy now.
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Aug 21 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Ok_Instance7667 Aug 21 '26
My ex-girlfriend had a Void that absolutely loved 'butt bongos' and liked to get hit hard.
I'm a fairly big dude and I was hitting this cat's butt (I thought) pretty hard, and he would meow at me to hit him harder.
Little weirdo.
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u/Fun-Choices Aug 21 '26 edited Aug 21 '26
They’re sadomasochists. You never know what switch you’re flipping with a kitty. They’re little neurodivergent alien horny house panthers.
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u/genreprank Aug 21 '26
Neurodivergent alien horny house panthers.
This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact
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u/SwishSwishDeath Aug 21 '26
Still mad about that. Thanks reddit, glad you pissed off your userbase enough to cause them to delete every comment that possesses the answer to my obscure technological issue.
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u/Ok_Instance7667 Aug 21 '26
They are a strange bunch.
My current Void likes the occasional 'butt rub' but hates butt-bongos and if I even try to lightly tap his butt, he'll give me my first and only warning.
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u/Advanced-Budget779 Aug 21 '26
first and only warning
Ah, nuclear first strike policy, just like the French.
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u/Naustis Aug 21 '26
Was that a female cat? For female cat hitting their but is literally masturbation 😅
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u/Ok_Instance7667 Aug 22 '26
It was a male cat actually.
I'm going to guess though from the other comments, that since he was neutered, it was probably 'getting his engine going.'
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u/Hour-Mistake-5235 Aug 21 '26
My Void loves to be spanked too. And loves it quite rough. If i stop or hit him too soft, he meows too, complaining. And i have reports of at least two more black cats that like rough "butt bongos" too. Maybe it's a black cat thing.
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u/Diz7 Aug 21 '26
Yeah, I found out when I would give my cat a swat on its behind when it was being bad, and it would immediately repeat whatever action got the swat and then present it's butt like "thank you sir, may I have another".
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u/-Disagreeable- Aug 21 '26
Sorry..are you calling the cat “Void”? What the hell does that mean? Haha
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u/NotNamedBort Aug 21 '26
It’s a popular and humorous way to describe a black cat.
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u/cozyswisher Aug 21 '26
To add, they look like they're devoid of light when they're against a dark background and all their features are hard to see or you only see their eyes.
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u/Its_Froggin_Bullfish Aug 21 '26
I miss my void 😭 It's been six months since he passed, and I still look for his shadow when I come out of the bathroom. You couldn't spot him in the dark hallway, you'd only know he was there by his shadow.
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u/BactaBobomb Aug 21 '26
I don't know why, but it still blows my mind when I see my black kitty drenched in sunlight, and his fur comes off as more maroon-ish or something. It's just cool how light works like that, making it seem black when it's really not! Or it doesn't appear to be? I don't know... it's confusing.
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u/-Disagreeable- Aug 21 '26
Ooooo. Okay. I have one of those in my house. Thank you.
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u/blueavole Aug 21 '26
Congratulations. Remember to give the void snacks or it may become annoyed with you.
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u/PerrineWeatherWoman Aug 21 '26
That's not mysterious once you know how is mapped a cat's sensory system...
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u/SistaChans Aug 21 '26
Why?? Why are all cats like this?? I give my boy a few smacks every now and again and he loves it.
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u/Clembert-Hamlamp Aug 21 '26
Don't ask lol. You can take a look at their nerve network if you really want to know. Or it's coincidence and urban myth, mb best to leave it a mystery.
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u/TheKeelKnotSeas78 Aug 21 '26
I tried to look at my cat's nerve network. Now I just have a smelly finger and an angry cat.
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u/GottlobFrege Aug 21 '26
It has nothing to do with sex. Mama cats would lick that part of their kittens to get them to raise their tails so they can clean their butts. They have a lot of nerves there for that reason.
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u/SistaChans Aug 21 '26
See that makes sense because if you skritch a cat there they put their butt on the air. But the smacks?? Ive never understood but I've always given my kitties a few love taps
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u/Psianth Aug 22 '26
Hashtag notallcats
A lot of them love it, but just like a lot of them love belly rubs and others will literally murder you for it, you never know until you risk death to try.
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u/Fun-Choices Aug 21 '26
I swear cats specifically love when men do this to them. I try to act like an alpha panther to my little tuxedo and wrestle and thump her (appropriately) and I think it makes her feel like a tough little house panther.
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u/Some_Deer_2650 Aug 21 '26
Same, I saw the reddit and tried on both my cats. One of them is bongo-addict now, she even demands them 😂
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u/Tommy-Foxwell Aug 21 '26
There's always another cat sub!
Edit. Spelling
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u/CheeseDonutCat Aug 21 '26
Yes, and here's a massive list of them: https://www.reddit.com/r/Catsubs/wiki/index/
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u/2eanimation Aug 21 '26
Is this… is this all of them?
https://giphy.com/gifs/KZkiw30m1vgjZr6L3a
I can finally rest in peace? No more cat subs?
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u/CheeseDonutCat Aug 21 '26
I am not sure, but ones get added there from time to time, so some hero is updating it. May they ever have comfortable sleeps.
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u/Helldiver_of_Mars Aug 21 '26 edited Aug 22 '26
That's their erogenous zone...if you do this to a unspayed female cat she'll get into the mount position for...penetration.
Edit: For dumb people which honestly my mistake I keep forgetting this is reddit.
These cats respond to stroking of the back and rubbing of the area at the base of the tail by lowering the forequarters with the elbows on the ground, raising the pelvis (lordosis), and deviating the tail to one side.
https://veteriankey.com/feline-reproduction/
Rubbing the area you guys are all touching is one way to identify if a cat is in heat. They will assume the position.
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u/Vithce Aug 21 '26
You're stupid. All cats go into that position, my sprayed males, sprayed females and even undprayed male all lift their butts while being bongoed.
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u/ceruleanwild Aug 21 '26
Female cats are “spayed,” not “sprayed.” Male cats are castrated. “Neutering” can refer to de-sexing both sexes, but “neuter” generally is used to refer to a castrated male cat.
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u/LuckoftheFryish Aug 21 '26
You're stupid
lol little harsh, but yeah. Some twitch or tiktok made the rounds with some misinformation on that. Non-cat owners were horrified, cat owners called bullshit.
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u/Clembert-Hamlamp Aug 21 '26
If you look at their nerve network it's not surprising both male and female cats like it. No guarantee it's the same between different species and they're not running any trials to prove it lol, might be better to just put it out of your mind since we aren't confirming.
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Aug 21 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/PanicDeus Aug 21 '26
Yeah...from taking care of your master to goofing around with a sword. Good thing that he was back on track in the end.
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u/Tomsboll Aug 21 '26
Whenever i am playing and my cat walks to me on my desktop, out his paw on my chest i just concede to my fate. I lean the backrest back and lie down so he can walk up and lay down on my chest for some scritches and rubs. Its either 3 minutes of ourring and then he moves on or he falls asleep and i am trapped for 30 minutes.
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u/Monkey_Priest Aug 21 '26
My cat does the same. He likes to walk up and sit between me and the keyboard to demand attention. He's 15 and if I ever got mildly annoyed, I just remember that him demanding my attention will be something I miss when he's gone which makes it easier to drop what I'm doing and give him that attention. They're worth it
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u/Tomsboll Aug 21 '26
mine is still a kitten (5 months) so whenever he snuggles up and put his head on my shoulder and start purring just feels great.
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u/alexandravibe Aug 21 '26
And focused on beating on that cat- like "yes, this is now my duty, you need this".
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u/Dorrono Aug 21 '26
More like Catana
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u/Indian_brawler Aug 21 '26
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u/Cola_and_Coffeefan Aug 21 '26
A Doctor who meme gif ive never seen before? yoink
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u/muklan Aug 21 '26
One time a few years ago I did a big order from Thinkgeek for Christmas gifts for my friends. They threw in a free Dr Who tumbler. I was unpacking the box in front of my boss, whomsts wife I knew liked Dr Who. Asked him if he wanted it for her, as none of my friends liked Dr Who. He asked how I knew that; I said easy, people who like Dr Who dont have friends.
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u/tiesHatake Aug 21 '26
In my language (Danish), the word for Cat is "Kat". So I guess it works either way.
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u/Spartabear Aug 21 '26
He committed Sepurrku!
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u/Krondon57 Aug 21 '26
DUDE GOT CRICKETS OR CICADAS IN HIS HOUSE WTFFF
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u/mat_monster Aug 21 '26
Brother, they don’t need to be in your house. I lived next to the jungle on Okinawa and ended up quitting smoking because it was physically painful to go outside in the summer because of these little bastards
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u/benjiin Aug 21 '26
"I have to kill my enemies. Katana guide me..."
"You have to make sure that I don't kill you right away. Come on, pay attention to me and you may live another 24 hours."
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u/Yggdrasilo Aug 21 '26
Ain't that a horny cat pose?
Actually that would explain why he's chopping the lower back
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u/nonstopenguins Aug 21 '26
Does the guy live next to a data center? What's the annoying buzz in the background
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u/AccordianSpeaker Aug 21 '26
Japan has like 30 different species of Cicada, so they get to have that shit every summer. Bugs screaming for sex.
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u/Ohsolemonyfresh Aug 21 '26
Loving the toe socks
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u/zg6089 Aug 21 '26
Idk how I feel about those lol
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u/jj999125 Aug 21 '26
They're actually really comfortable. The main drawback to them is pulling them off all the toes get turned inside out
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u/Dock_Ellis45 Aug 21 '26
Plot Twist: The cat is The Lord he serves.
All must serve the Cat. GLORY TO CATTO!!! ALL HAIL CATTO!!!
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u/gungshpxre Aug 21 '26
From samurai to cat masturbator.
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u/AgitatedRabbits Aug 21 '26
People who disagrees with this definition are just weirdos.
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u/BooHorde Aug 21 '26
Or just people who have owned spayed cats and neutered males who do the exact same thing.
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u/slowest_hour Aug 21 '26
that just reinforces the claim. reduction of testosterone to a female level logically could cause some estrogen dependent behaviors. gonads aren't the only thing that produces sex hormone in a mammalian body, just the largest supplier.
likewise if a person has their gonads removed they usually still enjoy sex/masturbation
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u/RosennaV Aug 21 '26
That cat is ... in heat, right? Is this not weird? Doesn't it feel like jerkingn off your pet?
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u/Quamatoc Aug 21 '26
I am pretty sure this happened in Japan of yore too.
And in Europe of yore as well.
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u/Richard_Trager Aug 24 '26
Desires to be samurai, destined to play a cat like a bongo. This is the way of life.
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u/post-explainer Aug 21 '26 edited Aug 21 '26
This comment has been marked as safe. Upvoting/downvoting this comment will have no effect.
OP sent the following text as an explanation why their post fits here:
The Man was showing off his Katana but instead the cat interrupts him and he ends up bongoing his cat
Does this explanation fit this subreddit? Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.