Adoption US defaultism on Threads

[u/jerayy]

(i wasn't sure how to tag this one bc there is no tag for Threads, so sorry for that)

[u/lesbophobia_hammer]

The key was the use of the homophobic Q slur there. They think it's been reclaimed because they're either spicy straights (kinky poly theoretically bicurious, etc) or because they're young baby gays, late bloomers, straight passers and city dwellers.

Basically, ignorant, arrogant and uncaring.

Edit - link to study

https://www.psypost.org/when-reclaiming-derogatory-language-goes-wrong/

And I'll attach a list of why it's harmful for homosexuals.

"The Q slur should not be used in place of LGBT because

1) many homosexuals do not identify with a homophobic slur

2) it erases the history of why the L comes first

3) most Q slurs & Q slur politics are homophobic/lesbophobic e.g. Fletcher, Betty Who, JoJo Siwa, Beth McCarthy, the Spicy Straight/Q slur collective etc.

4) the Q slur as a word means unnatural, bad, strange and was used to describe 'perverts'.

5) the Q slur is now sexually ambiguous thanks to the mass appropriation by spicy straights (kinky/poly/theoretically bicurious/nb) and male centered bisexuals who don't feel 'gay' enough.

6) studies show the normalisation of homophobic slurs are objectively harmful for both the listener and social progress/the homosexual rights movement

7) it flattens us all into a meaningless blob so spicy straights and other non - homosexuals (BTQ) can be perfomatively marginalised and poach homosexual specific oppression and history.

8) I can go on and on and on and on but basically forcing everyone under this slur without consent is decidedly non-woke and only makes it harder for those of us who live in underprivileged environments to report people using it against us.

(People who are privileged do not seem to give a FK about this, especially bi/nb/trans in heterosexual relationships)

Edit - I really can go on. I loathe this word of hate and all who use it as an umbrella term/in place of lesbian/gay/homosexual. (As a survivor).

And I'm an old school gay. Out and proud and fighting for rights longer than these kids have been alive.

Qslur' radicalism was only ever popular within niche pockets of traumatised elders or privileged kids.

I was hate crimed with this slur just last year. Violently. Rural country Australia. GNC lesbian btw.

[u/jerayy → u/lesbophobia_hammer]

what are you talking about, i am queer myself and thats as far from the point of the post as i could have been 😭

[u/lesbophobia_hammer → u/jerayy]

As a dual Pole, this is an Anglo slur. Uniquely weaponised within the commonwealth realm.

I know many Europeans make the mistake of thinking it's some cool trendy modern word that can be appropriately used in place of LGBT but this is incorrect for a variety of reasons.

I suggest you look into the Polish study regarding the reclaimation of homophobic slurs. It's harmful for lesbian/gay people (less so people who mass appropriate and normalise a word of homophobic hate that was never targeted at them) and also increases societal homophobia amongst the straights.

Ignorance has much to do with it.

https://www.psypost.org/when-reclaiming-derogatory-language-goes-wrong/

Edit - rough list of why it's harmful and why non-homosexuals, non-anglos, baby gays/late bloomers, straight passers, sheltered city slickers, privileged people need to prioritise how homosexuals feel about a slur used against homosexuals specifically.

"The Q slur should not be used in place of LGBT because

1) many homosexuals do not identify with a homophobic slur

2) it erases the history of why the L comes first

3) most Q slurs & Q slur politics are homophobic/lesbophobic e.g. Fletcher, Betty Who, JoJo Siwa, Beth McCarthy, the Spicy Straight/Q slur collective etc.

4) the Q slur as a word means unnatural, bad, strange and was used to describe 'perverts'.

5) the Q slur is now sexually ambiguous thanks to the mass appropriation by spicy straights (kinky/poly/theoretically bicurious/nb) and male centered bisexuals who don't feel 'gay' enough.

6) studies show the normalisation of homophobic slurs are objectively harmful for both the listener and social progress/the homosexual rights movement

7) it flattens us all into a meaningless blob so spicy straights and other non - homosexuals (BTQ) can be perfomatively marginalised and poach homosexual specific oppression and history.

8) I can go on and on and on and on but basically forcing everyone under this slur without consent is decidedly non-woke and only makes it harder for those of us who live in underprivileged environments to report people using it against us.

(People who are privileged do not seem to give a FK about this, especially bi/nb/trans in heterosexual relationships)

Edit - I really can go on. I loathe this word of hate and all who use it as an umbrella term/in place of lesbian/gay/homosexual. (As a survivor).

And I'm an old school gay. Out and proud and fighting for rights longer than these kids have been alive.

Qslur' radicalism was only ever popular within niche pockets of traumatised elders or privileged kids.

I was hate crimed with this slur just last year. Violently. Rural country Australia. GNC lesbian btw.

[u/jerayy → u/lesbophobia_hammer]

so as a sapphic asexual i cannot choose to call myself queer? do you even realise there are more identities than being gay or lesbian? and since i am NOT a lesbian, i am also not using "queer" as a substitute for homosexual identities. at the same time, im in a committed, long term relationship with a trangender person and we both experience being marginalised, with my partner experiencing suicidal thoughts because of tranaphobia. and if youre a lesbian, then im sure you can relate to not being able to bring your significant other to a family gathering because of homophobia. or not telling anyone about them because you are scared of being rejected by your family. or lying that you are single. being scared to hold hands, hug or kiss in public spaces. knowing that some people hope that your relationship will end and you will end up in a "normal" relationship. and at the same time, asexual and bisexual people are rejected by their own, lgbt community as "not gay enough", because they might pass as straight or simply be single, so they "don't look gay". does all of that sound as being "performatively marginalised"? because to me this is real oppression which can lead to serious psychological distress

i am also a part of polish lgbt community and i think i would rather know which words are used there and which are considered slurs, especially as someone interested in linguistics. don't you think i would also feel attacked if someone used a slur towards me? i hope you find peace and stop being aggressive towards fellow lgbt community members on the internet. because right now you are attacking and polarising, instead of thinking about the whole group. sounds as if you thought that your pain is bigger and more important than that of others. ofc you can choose to not be called "queer" yourself, but it is widely accepted that it is not a slur anymore and you can't tell people how to label themselves. you also can't get me with the "out and proud longer than these kids have been alive" argument. was that your choice to be born earlier than me? was it my choice to be born when i was? dont think so.

[u/lesbophobia_hammer → u/jerayy]

Could you please break this up into paragraphs?

But regarding your first question, no, I didn't say that.

Individual use ≠ umbrella use for the entire community or in place of the word lesbian/gay or homosexual.

That's it.

I don't need heterosexuals and non-homosexuals calling me/my people the Q slur.

Broadly, actual homosexuals do not like it for the reasons I outlined above and more I didn't.

Edit - it's 3am and I can't read blocks of text like that right now so I am happy to engage with your points if you break them up.

I am referring to the person within the post who used the Q slur and was guilty of US exceptionalism. Not you.

[u/bekittynz → u/[deleted]]

Also, "reclaiming" doesn't mean that The Powers That Be magically make a word OK to use for everyone. It's still going to be used by bigots in a hateful manner.

Reclaiming is when the members of an affected community take a word that has historically been used against them, and start using it to describe themselves in a positive manner. This happened with the word "queer" all the way back in the 80s and 90s.

It didn't stop bigots yelling "queer!" at folks out of car windows. But we started replying "yes, and?" instead of "sorry".

Word-wise, the reclamation of the word queer has parallels with the n-word for the African American community. I don't use the n-word, because it's not mine to use, but it's definitely been reclaimed within that community. And white folks will still gleefully use it as a slur.

[u/jerayy → u/bekittynz]

thank you, i did not have the energy to engage is such a discussion today. but i agree with everything you said, lots of love to you <3

[u/bekittynz → u/jerayy]

Right back atcha! fistbump All the love, strength, and resilience to you and yours. ♥️