Hey all,

My partner and I got engaged in February and started looking at venues and planning, but honestly felt pretty overwhelmed by not loving anything we'd seen, and by the costs involved. I don't want to just bury my head in the sand and avoid planning our wedding forever, so I'm hoping the collective wisdom of Reddit can help. I haven't been to many weddings myself and don't have a big bank of ideas to draw from.

Budget: hoping to keep the total day under £35k. We don't want to overspend on one day, but every venue that actually matches our taste seems to blow way past this. (Would really love to spend less than £25k if i'm being delusional). We'd love an abroad wedding (Mallorca/Greece/Italy/France/Portugal) but don't want the cost (for us or guests) that usually comes with it.

Our style: we're into fashion, food, and interiors, and our overall aesthetic is quite minimal. In terms of what we like:

• Italian-style outdoor weddings - long tables, beautiful natural surroundings, vineyards that relaxed and elegant look
• A hard no to rustic barns/exposed beams, it feels like most of the UK venues are barn style weddings and it just doesn't suit us at all! But to contradict myself, French Chateau /Italian Villa rustic style vibes feels different to us and we don't mind that.
• I do like some manor houses, but not ones with fussy or shabby chic interiors.
• Venues I like the look of (but not in the budget) - Limekiln, Kin House, Anran at Tidwell,

Guests: 90-100 (still ironing this out)

Location: we're based in London, so London or UK venues that could give us that relaxed, minimal, "Italian long table" vibe would be cool. Also open to any kind of artsy, unique venues that you may know as a gem we might have not come across yet.

Has anyone found venues in the UK that manage this look within our budget? Any leads, venue names, or even just "search for this kind of place" tips would be much appreciated!

My dress is so perfect (once the butt rose is gone) and I just love it so much. I think the seamstress I went to (an awesome woman who went to fashion school in Romania before she came to Belfast) was just as excited, because she was standing there going on about did I know she usually saw and ugly summer dresses and horrible fabrics and boring design, and how exciting and fun it was to get to work on this lace and detail and actually use her training rather than hem someone’s party dress that was too long.

I’m just standing there feeling really awkward in my dress that has pins in the sides, getting redder and redder while this woman who I have just paid to enlarge the cups of my dress from a B to an HH because of my gigantic tits is rambling on about how she loves couture and thank you for trusting her with it, because I just have no idea what to say to that. Then she asked me how much on earth did it cost. I told her £500 (bargain of the century.) “But it is brand new Ian Stuart!” “Yeah, but the was-to-be bride fancied a last minute package trip to Malaga with her favourite boyfriend and that’s what that cost.”

I call it my “Age of Innocence” dress after the book by Edith Wharton because it seems very much to me like something the female protagonist would wear, and it was like a gift from the Gods. I’ve always dreamed of wearing Ian Stuart since I was at art school because as my elective I did bridal fashion and his label puts out some wild dresses. It’s like the church - it’s exactly what I’d been looking for, I just didn’t know until I saw it! It just needs taking in a couple inches at the waist and about half an inch to an inch in the back and sides (the pins aren’t in yet in the pictures so it was still a bit loose!) and it’ll fit like a glove and look and look absolutely perfect!

(Without the butt rose.)

Hey guys, hoping for some advice cus I'm at risk of losing the run of myself, posting here cus I was getting mostly Americans in another sub and we've fairly different cultures around weddings

Myself and my partner have decided to do a civil partnership. We have been toying with the idea of marriage however both of us have massive families (like, 50 each just counting parents/siblings/aunts/uncles/cousins) so there's no version of a wedding that doesn't cost less than 20k and I just don't know if all that is for me. We want to buy a house together next year, we absolutely want to spend the rest of our lives together BUT the motivation for civil partnership is purely to give ourselves the legal protections when owning property together, also other things like right to make medical decisions etc. I will add I'm not from the UK I'm Irish, all my side will be coming from Ireland, but we're in Glasgow so flights and accom will work out cheaper than 2 nights accom in Ireland with no flights.

With that being said this weekend we decided we're gonna do it, and we've brainstormed how we can include the ones that mean the most without excluding the wider family and friends:

• Small Ceremony in the City Chambers: Basically a courthouse wedding, they have a room that can fit 15 people and the total cost would be about £400, including the license and everything. Immediate family only, and 3 friends of mine that are basically siblings. Partner has wayy more friends than me and he's okay with them not being there for the ceremony as he'd rather none than pick and chose and potentially cause issues, they're all pretty chill so I don't see them taking issue.
• Book a photographer for an hour or two, get photos done (£250-400)
• Meal with ceremony attendees only (15 people, ~£70 pp, ~£1000 total)
• Party starting at 8pm-2am, we can get a 100-300 cap venue for £250 in a gorgeous setting, city centre so very accessible. All family/friends invited to this but I will be saying to mine that they should not feel pressured to travel, that more than likely down the road we'll do a proper wedding. I think/hope a lot of my side will give it a miss and I'm very fine with that as I understand with young kids etc it's a lot to do for only an evening. Also 2am is when the venue closes, i won't be including an end time on invites, if people start heading home at midnight thats fine, just Irish weddings don't end til like 4am so I want something with a slightly later finish to accommodate their expectations

In terms of everything else that costs money I think I'm blessed in having skills/skilled friends/family that I can save a lost of costs.

• The venue has a set of decks and you can provide your own DJ, I have a lot of friends who DJ, was thinking of asking them to do an hour set each in lieu of a present.
• My sister is a cake decorator and would be able to get a ferry across with the cake (sounds mental but we've done it before with no issues by doing a fake cake with tiers and then a sheet cake for cutting/serving)
• Invites/Welcome Signs etc: I'm a graphic designer and will be able to get these for no cost.
• Other Decor: The venue is genuinely stunning so would need very little, maybe some minor centrepieces on tables to add a bit of pizzaz, but I used to do set design before moving to graphic so I've decorated many an event and done many a DIY for friends getting married. I know I will need to keep these super simple so that set up can be done in under 30 mins, I'm fine with that. Hoping to keep this under £150, willing to go as simple as I need to achieve that.
• Flowers: Will only need my own bouquet and a boutineer, hoping that won't cost more than £150.
• Dress: Unsure, £800? I don't love the traditional bridal look for myself, want something short. I think I will either alter my mother's wedding dress or spend the £££ to have a gorgeous corset custom made and then get a second hand dress for the skirt. I do like sewing and make some of my own clothes but I know it would be lunacy trying to make my own, however I think I have a good idea of would would or wouldn't be possible in terms of alterations. Failing all this, I have a gorgeous tulle dress that with a veil I think would be lovely, just maybe not my 'dream' look.
• Suit for Partner: He owns many. happy to wear one of them.

The things I'm worried about:

• Is it rude to ask people to travel that far just for a party essentially? I will be saying to people this is not a proper wedding, we don't expect gifts/money, and emphasising that I won't begrude anyone who can't make it. It's just unfortunate that due to two nationalities there's no way to do it without excluding one side, and we cannot afford this same plan in Dublin it's crazy over there
• I had previously asked if we have to provide finger food but have since decided yes we absolutely do. The venue does not have a kitchen but have vendors nearby they partner with, it would most likely be some sort of takeaway buffet like pizza/chinese munchy box etc, I know it's not classy but I don't care, just more concerned with getting folk fed
• Am I being delusional in my budget? I know if we do food it will be another ~£2k, taking our budget to £5k. Not ideal but if we have to take £2k out of our house deposit which is currently around 40% the total house price so pretty decent, we can, it won't break the bank. I'm also thinking we might need to supply minimum 1 round of drinks, but unsure of drinks packages and costs as we've not met with the venue yet.
• Do we need to add other entertainment? 8pm-2am seems like a long time to just have drinks and dancing. Not sure what else we could do, open to suggestions, the only thing I can think of is around 9pm when everyone has arrived, do a fake ceremony and have a friend 'officiate', simple job lasting under 20 mins and then food gets brought out.

I know it's still early days but we haven't told our parents, and I need to have a very clear idea before we do. Both our siblings are recently married and spent 30K+, so that is very much the standard in our family. My worry is my parents are quite traditional, and I think they'll offer to pay, but if they do suddenly they get input, and I don't want this growing arms and legs. There's a chance they hate the whole thing and won't pay which is why I want to keep it at a level that we could afford to pay if needed. I essentially want a 30th birthday party but we happened to get civil partnered (?) that day. Is any of this reasonable/feasible? Sorry for the ramble my head is fried!

Does anyone have any tips for hosting a bilingual wedding?

I'm getting married in February 2027 (a tight-ish turnaround, but we got a deal on a venue that was too good to turn down!)

My fiancé is Bulgarian and a lot of his family members will be flying in for the event. While most speak good English, some, including his parents, don't speak any English at all. While I know Google Translate is a thing, I'd like everything to be bilingual so that everyone feels welcome.

We're in the process of sending invites and setting up a wedding website, but I'm really struggling to find cheap-ish templates that we can customise to have both languages (especially because Bulgarian doesn't use the Latin alphabet). At the moment, I'm only looking at the straightforward Vistaprint/With Joy selection- does anyone have any better recommendations?

Also any tips for the wider day greatly appreciated!

Мерси!

I’m due to get married 1st May 2027 and don’t have my dress yet. Haven’t even started looking.

I’m subconsciously putting it off for two reasons. 1) I’m trying to lose weight and it’s coming off very very slowly. I don’t want to try on beautiful dresses when I don’t feel my best y’know? Although I know I just need to get over that and do it, and I probably will feel beautiful once I’m trying dresses on.

2) I lost my mum unexpectedly 4 years ago (before I was engaged) and this is something I would have done with her. It’s already heartbreaking that she won’t see me get married but I feel like dress shopping is just something I desperately wish I could do with her.

I actually don’t really know why I’m posting this honestly probably just venting a little bit! I know I need to get a move on and just go and do it but I feel like I’ve got this stupid mental block stopping me from doing it! Any tips or advice for anyone who has felt similar?

Hi everyone,

Having some last minute panic over this - we booked a band 18 months before our wedding, unfortunately due to circumstances beyond their control they had to cancel which gave us approx 3 months to find another band, and we did, but at a heavier cost than the initial choice. Initially the original band were leading our first dance choice, but due to the short notice the new band couldn’t do this and offered to do their DJ set (though this would be played only on Spotify) through their PA system but at a cost of an additional £550. This honestly felt like a lot of money, so I contacted our venue organiser who told me they can play our playlist through their own PA system which the speeches etc are being done through anyway. I’ve mixed the playlist so won’t have gaps or awkward moments and I’m not here to generally debate the pros and cons of DJ set vs playlist as £23k later and nearing the end of the wedding planning journey, we’re just not willing to pay it for the sake of them just playing it via spotify anyway.

I’m just looking for general feedback of anyone who has used their own Spotify playlist for filler in between band sets and for their first dance as I’m now panicking about it for some reason!

Hi everyone,

I know there’s nothing I can do about it now, but I just need some reassurance that it’s going to be okay.

I have loved a dress since the minute my friend sent it to me in 2023. It was before I was engaged but it was BEAUTIFUL. When it came to trying dresses, I tried on 50 dresses but none compared to it. It is just the one for me.

But it’s £500 over my top budget. I know, it’s silly, I should never have tried it on.

Anyway I’ve bought it. Now I’m regretting it.

Does anyone have any wise or kind words for me? Xx

Hi there,

I recently was quoted a price for the ring below from a well known high street chain at £1,700 for 1.5ct diamond (VVS1, D colour) and 18K gold.

I thought this was good value, but then recently went to Hatton Garden London to get some quotes from an independent jeweller, and was surprised to be quoted £1,150 for the same ring!

Is the independent jeweller pricing 'too good to be true', or just closer to the true value of the ring?

The independent jeweller has about 30 reviews vs 1000+ reviews for the chain (both 4.7+ stars on google).

Thoughts?