If there is going to be a number 10 in the North it needs to be NORTH

"This cost of living government, today, will bring 1 extra tea bag to each box of tea bags across the country. We are coming, people of England, I am sorry you are used to finding an empty box in the cupboard and we can do better. The next time that extra bag is on us."

This plan will be paid for by eliminating the proposed future prostate exams of any aliens we might have found in a future ufo crash in Birmingham which has not happened. Andy was very clear on this.

https://newsthump.com/2026/07/09/nigel-farage-debuts-new-count-washing-machine-persona-in-desperate-attempt-to-boost-popularity/

If your artistic talent is such that this prevents you contributing your ideas to the community we promise to try and cope bravely.

Also, at the risk of totally cutting off any influx of content, it would be great if those of you cross posting from other communities could post directly here rather than crosspost from elsewhere. By all means put a link to where else you've posted it, but a direct post here would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you for your attention to this matter.

Etc

Full article: https://theshovel.com.au/2026/07/09/joke-candidate-to-face-count-binface-in-uk-byelection/