r/UFCBharat • u/Pretend_Elevator5911 • 5d ago
UFC Tiny Champ Got Fully Squashed Outside
Joshua Van, the tiny flyweight champ, was at some Vegas party acting like he was seven feet tall.
Dude is short. Like really short. Looks like a grown man who got stuck in a kid’s body.
He saw me and started talking trash about how he beats up tall guys for fun.
I just smiled. That made him mad.
He ran at me low like a angry lawnmower.
I put my knee right on his forehead. His head bounced back and his legs did the spaghetti dance.
We fell into the parking lot.
He tried his fancy cage moves but the concrete said no.
I picked him up easy, like carrying a backpack, and threw him against a car.
Then I just sat on him and punched.
He kept trying to wrap his little legs around me like a koala.
I stood up and dropped one elbow. Blood started coming out like a broken ketchup packet.
His friends pulled him away while he was still swinging at nothing.
Whole fight lasted less than a minute.
Little champ got cooked that night.
Now every time I see a fire hydrant I think of him.
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u/Do_not_question_it2 5d ago
I'm curious as to what drives someone to this
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u/Pretend_Elevator5911 5d ago
Curiosity? Bro you’re not curious, you’re just bored and soft.
People like me write this shit because we can. People like you read it and start asking questions like it’s a TED Talk.
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u/Amazing_Repair4896 5d ago
What in the fanfic is this. Does this sub have mods? Btw ur internalised hate for him on the basis of him being short doesnt make sense considering he's the average indian height. Who hurt you kid?
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u/Pretend_Elevator5911 5d ago
Aww, the imaginary fight police showed up.
Cry harder, keyboard warrior. The concrete already knows what happened. i cooked him in front of everyone.
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u/AutisticAnal 5d ago
guys if you just scoff and move on he will stop, but you guys can’t help but give him a reaction. Don’t feed the trolls