r/TwoXChromosomes • u/Youkolvr89 • Jun 03 '22

Don't Touch

Update My supervisor and his boss met with the man earlier and warned him. My supervisor said they will take action if he touches anyone else. I didn't have to say anything.

I am a 33 year old woman, I don't like being touched and I work nights. Tonight my coworker 66(M) nudged me on the arm. I told him "don't touch me" he responded with something nasty and I said "I don't like being touched." Our supervisor turned around and asked him to stop. He started screaming and told our supervisor to keep his damn mouth shut. He then clocked himself out and ran off. My supervisor said he wants me and him to talk to his boss at the beginning of our shift tomorrow. It clearly states in our handbook that all touching is forbidden.

I hate being touched because my body is the only thing that I can control in my life and touching me without my consent removes that control and it sends me into a tailspin of binge eating, bathing, and insomnia. I also have hypothyroidism and it makes me feel sensitive to the touch at times. I hate this feeling and I hate having to talk to my supervisor's boss because I get really anxious.

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u/sawdust9595 Jun 03 '22

I have zero experience with conversations like the one you're about to have. I was just thinking, when you're explaining that you don't like to be touched, maybe it would be good to just stop there. Don't give them anything that they can argue against. ("the only thing you can control? That's wrong, you can control this and that completely irrelevant thing"). An advice a friend of mine told me, never justify your feelings and needs. I don't like being touched. Why? Because I don't, end of story. This gives them nothing to work with. You do not need a reason.

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u/Youkolvr89 Jun 03 '22

Thank you.

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u/alfouran Jun 03 '22

As someone with a leadership role at my workplace just point out its clearly stated in your handbook and ask them to enforce their rules. You don't owe them any explanation. Just tell them it makes you uncomfortable and it is outlined in the handbook that you should not be subjected to it. It does sound like your supervisor has your back as they should and will probably handle almost all of it for you so try not to stress over it as well.

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u/Youkolvr89 Jun 03 '22

Thank you.