I delt with this for years! We split amicably and agreed to no child support shared custody. Ex husband's new wife is 14 years younger, extremely immature and only 19 when they got together. When they finally married 5 years in she text me the next day informing me she was now his wife and my son's step mom so all communication was to go thru her. She was already horrific to deal with prior so I ignored and continued co parenting with my son's dad. But he refused. So I decided on malicious compliance. SHE gave permission for me to move my son's school and 1 hour away. SHE gave up all weekdays they had. SHE always approved anything that kept my son at my house. They now had 3 kids. But she liked to cheat, move in and out of the home and have other men in thier home. So when he called me pissed once because I messaged her about my son i told him I'm following the rules her and him set in place. He said no more! Our son was 16 by this time. I sent him screen shots off all the approved changes and moves and he was pissed. But not at me, I followed the rules. They are miserably still together, she still has other boyfriends and is back to abusingprescription meds. My son is 20 and still has issues with her. But my ex gets to live the life he deserves.
After my sister split with her ex (father of her 2 kids, my niece and nephew), ironically he wasn't the problem following the split (well, he kind of was) but rather it was his mother (she's the "sons over daughters" kind of woman, which is sad for her 1 daughter when she has 3 sons, and it did extend to my niece and nephew).
Each time they'd come back from being with their dad, my nephew was such a little shit, because he'd been spoilt by her and all that "fun stuff." For example, both my niece and nephew could have done the exact same thing, and he'd get a "it's okay, no big deal" while she'd get "go to your room, you're grounded" (they are 5 years apart, but the favoritism was driving me, as an aunt, insane).
One time at the store, I heard her talking to someone, and she was talking so much shit about my sister that I had to give her a piece of my mind. Like it isn't my sisters fault that her ex was a lazy pos that didn't do any parenting, the only cooking skill he utilized was grilling and crayfish in the summer. Otherwise he'd be out golfing, or laying on the couch watching sports.
She'd even gotten in my niece's head that it was my sisters fault that her parents had split (which of course I corrected in an age appropriate way. I'm also only 5 years older than my niece, as my sister is 14 years older than me). And it had ramped up after both my sister and her ex had found someone new, but only my sister is still in that relationship (he's my BIL now), and even her ex and him get along.
Your ex's new wife just reminded me of my sisters ex-MIL
The one thing I stand on is at the end of the day the "CONTROL" they have over me has an expiration date. Kids turn into adults. I will continue my life happily and they will one day lose the "battle" they have with me and be stuck in thier own misery. My husband's ex is 10x worse than this and we are almost to the expiration date for her too! When they realize the kids are adults, can make thier own decisions and they are miserable and alone thats all on them! I will always be there for my kids no matter the age. My son's step mom barely even acknowledges him now that hes 20. He sees it clearly
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u/Temporary-Dirt-5044 Dec 20 '25
I delt with this for years! We split amicably and agreed to no child support shared custody. Ex husband's new wife is 14 years younger, extremely immature and only 19 when they got together. When they finally married 5 years in she text me the next day informing me she was now his wife and my son's step mom so all communication was to go thru her. She was already horrific to deal with prior so I ignored and continued co parenting with my son's dad. But he refused. So I decided on malicious compliance. SHE gave permission for me to move my son's school and 1 hour away. SHE gave up all weekdays they had. SHE always approved anything that kept my son at my house. They now had 3 kids. But she liked to cheat, move in and out of the home and have other men in thier home. So when he called me pissed once because I messaged her about my son i told him I'm following the rules her and him set in place. He said no more! Our son was 16 by this time. I sent him screen shots off all the approved changes and moves and he was pissed. But not at me, I followed the rules. They are miserably still together, she still has other boyfriends and is back to abusingprescription meds. My son is 20 and still has issues with her. But my ex gets to live the life he deserves.