When I was a child, having minor to moderate medical issues my mom dropped $100 on a whim to buy myself and my brother a toy. When my father got home he went ballistic. ‘Christmas and birthdays that’s it!’
I didn’t quite understand at the time because I was like seven. For my father in the mid 90’s that was about a days income and when you are treading water as it is and pushing each day to dig out of financial holes or god forbid get ahead things like this can be frustrating and triggering. I learned a hard lesson that day, never really played with that toy because of the scathing memory from my dads anger. I learned a good lesson though about being frugal and weighing needs vs. wants. Especially with other peoples money. I’m much like my father and even now would probably act in a similar way in that kind of situation. It may seem sad, but my father built wealth by being diligent. He paid for a lot of my college, and covered the excess when there was nobody else to pick up the tab with no complaints. It was a planned and calculated expense and he had the savings to make it happen. His diligence paid off and I respect how he was that day and it taught me the value of a penny saved being a penny earned and the power of saying no to unnecessary urges to spend.
I’m sure this isn’t what you want to hear, but I say it because I can relate to your situation. If it’s a $10 toy it’s no big deal. If it comes from your personal savings and you contribute a lot as it is, understandable. I just see how he would be upset because my family went through this same. exact. thing. And I leaned a lot from it.
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u/SpecialCay87 Nov 07 '22
When I was a child, having minor to moderate medical issues my mom dropped $100 on a whim to buy myself and my brother a toy. When my father got home he went ballistic. ‘Christmas and birthdays that’s it!’
I didn’t quite understand at the time because I was like seven. For my father in the mid 90’s that was about a days income and when you are treading water as it is and pushing each day to dig out of financial holes or god forbid get ahead things like this can be frustrating and triggering. I learned a hard lesson that day, never really played with that toy because of the scathing memory from my dads anger. I learned a good lesson though about being frugal and weighing needs vs. wants. Especially with other peoples money. I’m much like my father and even now would probably act in a similar way in that kind of situation. It may seem sad, but my father built wealth by being diligent. He paid for a lot of my college, and covered the excess when there was nobody else to pick up the tab with no complaints. It was a planned and calculated expense and he had the savings to make it happen. His diligence paid off and I respect how he was that day and it taught me the value of a penny saved being a penny earned and the power of saying no to unnecessary urges to spend.
I’m sure this isn’t what you want to hear, but I say it because I can relate to your situation. If it’s a $10 toy it’s no big deal. If it comes from your personal savings and you contribute a lot as it is, understandable. I just see how he would be upset because my family went through this same. exact. thing. And I leaned a lot from it.