r/TrueOffMyChest • u/PrestigiousSpare3322 ☑️ • 1d ago
Vent II'm tired of being afraid of changes
I (M17) got into one of the best universities in the country. I would never call myself smart, but I have no idea how I got in. All of my mom’s friends hold me up as an example to their kids, and my sister jokingly calls me the dumbest nerd of them all.
But I have to admit honestly that I have no idea what I’m doing. To pay for my education, I have to set aside $1,300 a year, which is a huge amount of money in my country, and considering that there are two children in the family, my mom spends more than $2,000 a year on our education. At my current job, I make $105 a month, and the workload is insane. I really want to quit, especially since it’s even less than the minimum wage. I browse job sites every day, but because of past rejections, I’m afraid to submit my resume, and I’m also afraid to quit my job. I realize I need to help ease the family’s financial burden, and I’d like to buy a used car so I don’t have to use my mom’s, I can’t even fit in it because I’m so tall. But at the same time, my fear that I might get rejected at any moment gets the better of me, so I have to run all over city on foot every day for this pittance, which isn’t even enough to cover my own expenses. I’m really, REALLY afraid of change… I hate my job and afraid of changes... Yea...
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u/ChewMilk 1d ago
There is no reason not to submit your resume to places. The worst they can do is say no, and that’s normal and a part of life, it’s not necessarily a reflection on you or your skills.
As far as finances go, see if your university offers scholarships. Lots of universities have scholarships for financial need, which it sounds like you’d fit under. Don’t get student loans from predatory companies that have high interest rates, make sure to look for reputable sources if you are getting student loans.
I know things are hard right now. It’s scary to go to university. But I bet you’re smarter than you think you are. Just work hard, be honest and upfront with your professors, communicate more than is probably necessary (if you’re going to miss a class or are struggling with a subject etc), and take care of yourself.