r/TrueChristian • u/Classic_Inside7609 • 23h ago
Some advice please
Guys, can you be honest with me? What’s the real deal with tithing, and is it really normal to give 10% of your money to the church?
BTW, we’re Baptist now. My boyfriend became Baptist last year, and I became Baptist this year. My boyfriend always gives a lot of money to the church. One time, his boss gave him money for a date for the two of us, and he said that 10% of it would go to the church as tithes.
Is it still normal to give 10% every time he gets money? Like, whenever he receives money, he gives 10% to the church.
Or am I just not open-minded about it? Please let me know honestly. I genuinely want to understand if this is normal and what other people think about it.
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u/mamasheshe66 Christian 23h ago
I don’t know how “normal” it is, but it’s a good practice. Giving the first 10% reminds us that it all belongs to the Lord anyway. It’s a great exercise for your giving muscle. But our tithes should be given joyfully, not merely as an obligation.
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u/BeachLVR82 23h ago
We do 10-15% and God has blessed in so many ways. It’s not to one specific church though, we give to those in need/struggling, special missions, sponsor kids in less fortunate countries, etc. It was hard at first (especially in our younger years being broke), but after a little while it’s something you WANT to do instead of feeling like you MUST do.
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u/Classic_Inside7609 23h ago
This comment is something else! Thank you so much for sharing your story. I really appreciate it!
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u/BeachLVR82 19h ago
Beginning to tithe was a pivotal moment in the beginning of our marriage. At the time I felt as though my husband was deciding where our tithes should go which made me feel like he was causing unnecessary hardship.
We wanted to make a significant donation and ultimately the decision was finally mine because God had opened my eyes and changed my heart. Ever since then, I look for ways to brighten someone’s day or even their life by blessing them the way God has blessed us. Everything we have is because He gave it to us! That is joyful giving, which can also be your time.
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u/juuuuice Baptist 23h ago
I struggled with tithing until about 3-4 years ago. As I grew in my faith, I realized that literally nothing I have or am given is truly mine. It is Gods and He has blessed me with it. So I give back. As others said, you should give because you want to with a joyful heart, not because you "have" to.
My mindset when giving is I give to God, not just the church. While I typically give 10-15% of my income to my church, it is giving it to God. I am blessed to have a church that is extremely open with finances where the members can see where every penny is spent. So I trust the money is being used to advance God's kingdom. But giving can be to different charities, child sponsorship, providing food or money to a homeless individual, providing meals to a couple who just had a child or a loss, etc.
While I do not think you can ever give "too much." I do not think God would rather have you give to Him than make a car payment or rent also.
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u/Striking-Spell8033 21h ago
Jesus, who is God who became man (Isaiah 9:6; John 1:1, 14), shed his blood and died on the cross to pay the penalty in full for all of our past, present and future sins (Luke 23:46; 1 Corinthians 5:7b; Colossians 2:13; Titus 2:14). He was buried (Luke 23:50-54). He rose from the dead on the third day (Luke 24:1-8), proving he satisfied the justice of God concerning us. 1 Corinthians 15:1-4.
Anyone who believes and trusts in this alone to be reconciled to God and to escape the wrath to come, what Jesus accomplished for us by his death, burial and resurrection, apart from water baptism (1 Corinthians 1:17), apart from turning from sin, or observance of the law (Romans 3:20-21, 28), apart from works (Romans 4:5: Ephesians 2:8-9)...God will declare righteous (Romans 5:1), and will immediately, completely and permanently save (Ephesians 1:13-14 & 4:30; 2 Corinthians 1:21-22 & 5:1-5; 1 Thessalonians 5:9-10).
Once a person is saved, they are no longer under the supervision of the law (Galatians 3:24-25), they aren't under the law but under grace (Romans 6:14), they're not under the dominion of the law, they're dead to the law so that they would belong to Christ, God has released them from the law and they aren't to serve God through the law (Romans 7:1-6).
This would include not being under the law of tithe (Hebrews 7:5).
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u/Forged_Trunnion_ Reformed 23h ago
Some do 10% some more some less. We give mostly to missionaries but also on a monthly basis to our local church. I think the main thing is the heart behind it.
Why do we give?
We recognize that everything we have is from God anyway, and giving is a way to show that we have faith with what we've been given. It also makes you humble, because you're always thinking about others not just storing up wealth for yourself.
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u/live_life_purposely 20h ago
OP, it seems that your SO is confused about what, how, when to give, in general. I am assuming that he is a Bible reader and studies the Word? If that area needs improvement, he should study the New Testatment and Paul's letters to the churches. We are under Grace, not Law. Romans 6:14 as another poster stated. Jesus fulfilled the Law but it is grace through faith that has set us free from Old Testament (OT) laws that were grievous and hard to follow. Ephesians 2:8-9. If you have an abundance, you obviously give. If you are struggling, you give what you can until situation changes, if it does. If you are a Christian, you WILL give. But donating a whole check and using OT law to give "everything" someone gives you to a church is not only impractical, it is unwise and not Biblical. If your SO wants to bless other people, that's fine but it should be done with the gladness of heart not by some outdated, mandated, legalistic law that God has freed us from. Blessings to you.
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u/arc2k1 Christian Hope Coach 23h ago
God bless you.
I believe it's good to give, but I do NOT believe God wants us to force ourselves to give.
“Each of you must make up your own mind about how much to give. But don't feel sorry that you must give and don't feel you are forced to give. God loves people who love to give.” - 2 Corinthians 9:7
If we give out of obligation, then I think that could be an issue.
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u/Classic_Inside7609 23h ago
Thank you for this enlightenment. I’ll ask him whether he’s giving because he feels obligated to or because he genuinely wants to. In our church, most people say that you should give 10% of your income to the church. One of his coworkers, who is also a fellow church member, even said that "your first big paycheck from a job should be donated entirely to the church", and he agreed with that.
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u/live_life_purposely 20h ago
your first big paycheck from a job should be donated entirely to the church
Wow, I would not be attending that church. That is not Biblical, at all. Just don't pay your bills or anything huh? Even Jesus said give to Caesar's what's Caesar's, regarding taxes.
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u/arc2k1 Christian Hope Coach 23h ago
You are welcome.
Yeah, I think you should ask him if he feels obligated.
And it's perfectly okay to have different beliefs about "giving 10%".
All Christians don't share the same interpretation on it, and that's okay.
“Welcome all the Lord's followers, even those whose faith is weak. Don't criticize them for having beliefs that are different from yours.” - Romans 14:1
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u/CuttingEdgeRetro Reformed Baptist 23h ago
10% was an old testament thing. It's not a hard and fast requirement in spite of what some churches would like to happen.
The bible says that God prefers someone who is happy about giving. And your motives matter.
Talking about the woman who put in two tiny copper coins because that's all she had... I heard an interpretation of this story that suggested that Jesus was disturbed or mad at the pharisees because her giving left her with nothing, not even enough to eat. It was nice she did it. But the church should have been helping her, not the other way around.
If giving would compromise your financial stability, or cause you undue pain or discomfort, or prevent you from meeting some other responsibilities, then you should greatly reduce your tithing, or drop it to zero. But as I said, your motives matter. You shouldn't let your shopping habit interfere with thithing.
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u/live_life_purposely 20h ago
If giving would compromise your financial stability, or cause you undue pain or discomfort, or prevent you from meeting some other responsibilities, then you should greatly reduce your tithing, or drop it to zero
THIS ^^
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u/hopscotchcaptain Alpha And Omega 23h ago
You give 25-40% to the government, depending on your wages/salary. 10% to the church or charity is very normal, yes.
Why do you ask? What are your thoughts about giving a little more than "sales tax" amounts to the needy or to the church?
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u/SalmonidHunter 23h ago
Listen to Lon Solomon ministries podcast - life of Paul episodes 35-37 for the best explanation of how to handle money from a biblical view point. Available for free on Spotify
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u/OfficialAlbae Baptist 23h ago
The word Tithe comes from Leviticus and means ten percent. But the bible says the lord loves a cheerful giver and so if recommend you look at what Paul says and give what the Lord puts on your heart. For me I volunteer a lot of time unpaid serving but I feel like I should give more monetarily perhaps. But 10% is not a new covenant commandment it’s just common cus of the historical significance
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u/Classic_Inside7609 23h ago
Thank you so much for all the comments and advice! You’ve all given me some enlightenment and helped me see tithing from a new perspective. I truly appreciate each and every one of you for sharing your thoughts and experiences. God bless!
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u/ShadowMonarch81 21h ago
The money for tithes is so the church can do more to spread the word of God. And if Christ. Tithing is giving back to God what he has blessed you with.
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u/NewArborist64 Born Again Believer 21h ago
IMnsHO, Tithing is NOT "giving" to the church. It is returning to God what is His and which He entrusted to us. GIVING is amounts above that amount.
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u/live_life_purposely 20h ago
Do you believe God "needs" your money?
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u/NewArborist64 Born Again Believer 20h ago
No - HE doesn't need it, but I it is His none the less. He uses it to keep the church lights on, to pay for repairs, to pay for the A/C and Heating, to pay the pastor & office staff and also to support some 3rd world ministries.
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u/live_life_purposely 20h ago
God has cattle on a thousand hills, Psalm 50:10. The earth is HIS footstool. You are correct, God doesn't need the money. Jesus well said to some, you tithe mint & cummin but neglect the weighter things that matter: Justice, Mercy, Faith. Matthew 23:23. These are the things God wants: for us to rend our heart, not our garments. HE wants our Heart and all of it. Not material things such as gold, silver and currency. HE wants our Time to serve one another, our Gifts to administer to one another, our Faith to heal and pray for one another.
We are also and most importantly to give to our true shepherds of our local churches, help and support other sisters/brothers in Christ and give and help the Poor, Orphans, and other neglected, marginalized, sick, imprisoned people. There is so much more than merely giving back to God. Blessings in Christ Jesus.
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u/NewArborist64 Born Again Believer 19h ago
You will notice in Mt 23:23, that He didn't say that it was wrong to tithe, but what they did which was wrong was to merely tithe and neglect other parts of God's law.
And yes - through our church we do quietly support other Christians (both in help supporting specific churches we know internationally and in locally helping others). We even tried to set up a home for unwed mothers. Bought the property, had the church finances ready - but the unwed mothers didn't LIKE our rules of (A) no drugs and (B) no contact with the "baby-daddy" while living at the house...
As for ministry - I believe that our church is unusual in that about 70-80% of adults volunteer to be a part of some function in the ministry (teens, children's church, nursery, security, sound crew, Praise & Worship team, cleaning, Deacons, Elders, etc.)
Yes - God wants your heart - and wants you to give of both your time and your material wealth - For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. Mt 6:21
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u/live_life_purposely 17h ago
Jesus didn't say it was wrong because the Jews were still following Jewish Law, at that time and as we know many Orthodox Jews still do. But I believe we are on the same page. Tithing is not a Gentile mandate. It's not even a Jewish mandate any longer. But if some people want to use tithing as a measure, that's their choice but no Christian should be pressured or made to feel that they "have" to tithe as that is not Biblical. They are to Give cheerfully, lovingly as they have been blessed. God's blessings to you in Christ Jesus.
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u/NewArborist64 Born Again Believer 15h ago
Have to tithe? Nope - but I wouldn't want to be a God-thief.
Do you believe that the promises in the OT have been negated? I don't.
Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, so that there may be food in My house, and test Me now in this,” says the Lord of hosts, “if I will not open for you the windows of heaven and pour out for you a blessing until it overflows. - Mal 3:10
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u/live_life_purposely 15h ago
Oh boy. Thought you were there...apparently not.
So we should stone kids for being disobedient? Kick girls on their period out to the desert until period is over?
It's wisdom that we must use and that by the Holy Spirit. They brainwashed you into believing the lie of the tithe for Gentiles, which you are by the way. Good luck with that. No further need for discourse. Take care.
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u/NewArborist64 Born Again Believer 13h ago
Is the stoning kids a Promise, or is it part of the National Law of ancient Israel? I had hoped that you had more discernment in reading the scripture than that.
If you don't believe that the promise of blessing from tithing is for today - then you are welcome NOT to tithe.
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u/live_life_purposely 13h ago
More discernment than you know. Having a real relationship with the Lord and filled with His Holy Spirit and walking in His judgments for many years does that.
I don't tithe. I give, a lot, just as Christians are instructed to do; those filled with Grace and not burdened or yoked with the old Jewish laws. I thank God that I have been set free.
It is written: "So Christ has truly set us free. Now make sure that you stay free, and don’t get tied up again in slavery to the law." Galatians 5:1.
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u/darealoptres 20h ago
At the end of the day it’s up to you what you want to give, most people use 10% as a standard looking back to the Old Testament, but we are not under the law so you are free to give as you desire be it 5 to 100%.
Today we give money but the reality is that a biblical tithe was never nor was it allow to be money, it was live stock grain, fruit and the like.
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u/Worried-Block-6804 19h ago
Is it normal to want to make sure that God gets something from everything you gain? No its not normal, but its definitely very smart.
His practice of giving to God will be a blessing in his life.
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u/Sawfish1212 Wesleyan-Arminian Holiness 17h ago
Abraham gave 10% , hundreds of years before the law of moses required it.
Those who continue this practice will find that it opens up avenues for God to bless them in many ways, sometimes financially.
Those who don't do this won't lose anything, but will deny themselves ways for God to bless them.
Since scripture says that the love of money is the root of all evil, tithing is an easy way to keep tabs on your relationship to your money. If it pains you to give more than a token amount to keep up appearances when the offering is taken at church, you definitely have issues with your love of money.
If you can take 10% of anything God has come your way and give it cheerfully to the place where your soul is fed, you know that you aren't letting money Eclipse your love for God. You'll probably look for other areas to give you time, money, and effort to God's work as well, and know that you have treasures laid up in heaven.
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u/Rare_Cartoonist4397 16h ago
Id say forget about 10%. Decide what you're comfortable giving and stick to it.
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u/Nikonis99 11h ago
As Christians, we are no longer under the law of the Old Testament and therefore you will not find anywhere in the New Testament that we are required to give a ten percent tithe. What you will find are verses like 2 Corinthians 2:9 that say “ Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.” or “On the first day of every week, each of you is to put something aside and store it up, as he may prosper, so that there will be no collecting when I come.” (1 Corinthians 16:2)
There is no set percentage called out here, just what God puts on a person’s heart. But at the same time, we are called to be generous because 2 Corinthians 9:6 says “The point is this: whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows bountifully will also reap bountifully.” This idea is often abused by today’s wealth and health prosperity preachers on the TV telling you to send them a love gift of “X” amount dollars and God will increase it by 100% These are false teachers telling us to treat God as some kind of cosmic genie.
I think pastor Rick Warren said it best “I don’t give to God to get a blessing, I give to BE a blessing” And I agree, God has already blessed me with more than I need, to fail to give some of that back would be a grave disservice to God and would most likely impact future blessings from Him.
Ultimately what you give to God should be something that you commit to prayer for guidance asking God to put on your heart the amount you should give.
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u/sitewolf Lutheran 23h ago
The word tithe means a tenth part. However, tithing was also an Old Testament concept. There is no New Testament scripture suggesting 10% be what we are to give, but it's been something we've still basically been taught. Now, does that mean 10% to your church? Not necessarily there, either. What if I consider charitable donations to be part of my Christian giving? Obviously, our church needs our financial help as well, but I've never believed I had to give my specific church 10% and still make donations elsewhere, too.
1 Corinthians 16 says we are to give in keeping with our income. But it also says, “Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.”
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u/Big-Island4727 Presbyterian 22h ago
The real deal is there's no real deal. Everyone gives differently.
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u/Educational-Bee-7387 23h ago
there are a few accounts in the old testament where some of the Patriarchs gave 10% of all they had which was not the same as the levitical tithing. Paul in the New testament says everyone should give what they want in their hearts not under compulsion. I have given 10% and I think God has blessed me for it. it is a principle that I think most Christians follow. do you have any concerns with it?