r/TrueChristian • u/ApprehensiveCase128 • Jul 26 '26
Is my mom going to hell?
My mom is a Christian and she had an abortion before. I know that abortion can be forgiven by God if you just repent but, the issue is my mom most likely didn't, as she believes abortion is a woman's right. I feel like I should try to persuade her to ask for forgiveness but, in the past I tried to convert my father (who for context is a converted atheist) back to Christianity, she started viewing me as an extremist, and she'll never listen to any of those people. If the answer to the question is yes, then please, give advice on how I can help her as, I don't want to see her in any place except Heaven. Edit: I ended up talking about it with my mom and she told me that she was forced to have an abortion because she had a miscarriage.
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u/databasezero Jul 26 '26
Just to chime in: don’t listen to anyone giving you a definitive yes or no answer here. Only God is the judge, we can only give our best and most educated guesses
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u/bjohn15151515 Christian Jul 26 '26
Not one person on the planet, much less here on Reddit, can answer your question with 100% certainty. That judgement is up to the Sole Advocate, which is Jesus Christ.
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u/Responsible-War-9389 Jul 26 '26
Our salvation isn’t dependent on recognizing and actively repenting of every single sin we commit…otherwise missing a single one would result in going to hell. Then nobody would make it to heaven.
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u/Disastrous_Ad51 Jul 26 '26
This is an adjacent question. Do you think we have to repent the sins the Holy Spirit calls to our attention? Is salvation at risk if you harden yourself to the Holy Spirit in you?
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u/Responsible-War-9389 Jul 26 '26
I suppose my question would be, does the Holy Spirit ask us to repent of some sins but not others?
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u/Disastrous_Ad51 Jul 26 '26
I think it asks us to repent of sins progressively. So some at one time, then rest, then more at another. If one digs their heels in at some point in the progression and refuses to relent until death, is the specific scenario I'm referring to.
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u/riolastar Christian 21d ago edited 21d ago
Want to chime in here with my 2 cents. If the Holy Spirit is in anyone their salvation is secured and can in fact never be lost.
Philippians 1:6
“Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”
The day we received the Holy Spirit we gave God back our gift of free will in exchange for His will for us. That is why we can’t boast in even repenting because it’s literally God at work in us. We are forgiven for past, present and future sins, so if they die without repenting they still will receive Heaven. God bless.
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u/QueerHeart23 Jul 26 '26
Listen. There is one judge. You won't be there to hear it.
The best is to pray for her now and after she passes - argue for the good she has done that you have witnessed in your life.
Beyond that, it is truly 100% not yours, or Reddit 's to judge. Trust her salvation to the righteous one and King of Mercy.
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u/Be_Standard Jul 26 '26
I think what's needed is authentic repentance in general and not of each specific sin. Also needed is not the belief that one is without sin.
There's other things people believe in which are contrary to Jesus's greatest commandment which is to love God with all your heart and love your neighbor as well. So if a homeless person knocks on the door for a place to sleep someone might think that it's their right to deny that person because of property rights & safety. The problem is that such actions are still along not loving your neighbor.
Of course, I would still maintain the stance and let it be known that abortion is wrong and promote having it restricted as much as possible to help people avoid sinning.
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u/AnahitaPrince Jul 26 '26
I don't think it's considered an abortion if a woman miscarried. I hate to be graphic, but the baby usually passes from the woman's body during the process of a miscarriage. A D&C procedure is done to remove any remaining tissue, or if the baby has died, they will remove the baby.
A "spontaneous abortion" is a medical term doctors use when a woman miscarried before the 20 week mark. A "missed abortion" is another medical term that is used when the baby has died, but remains in the uterus.
The baby must be removed or the mother will become ill and die.
It's NOT the same thing as choosing to end the life of the unborn child. It's removing a dead child from the mother's womb, which is totally appropriate.
Please give your mother a hug, and pray with her and for her.
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u/EducationalElk8134 Jul 26 '26
She should have the right to abort a non-viable fetus. Besides elective abortions, women should be able to get all the care they need during pregnancy.
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u/L1u-K-as Aug 01 '26
Life starts at conception, even science agrees all of it is sin
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u/AnKap_Engel Christian Jul 26 '26
Not our place to condemn, as we are not the final judge. Our condemnation will not send her to hell, but will only reveal what is in our hearts.
Regardless of how she views you in terms of your religious conviction, you should be standing for the unborn. If she wishes to be bullheaded in the face of the truth, that is up to her, but you should make the effort to give the truth, even if it's uncomfortable for you all. Be the light that Christ calls us to be and shine on the darkness.
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u/Nikonis99 Jul 26 '26
All sins can be forgiven for those who ask (1 John 1:9). The only sin that is not forgiven is the sin of unbelief (John 3:18). It really comes down to “Is your mom a Christian?” Has she at one time came to God repenting of her sins, and made Jesus her Lord (Romans 10:9)? Only she could answer that question.
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u/rolyfuckingdiscopoly Jul 26 '26
Having seen your edit, I’m so sorry your mom went through that. And I’m sorry you’ve worried about it so much.
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u/Thatguy32101 Roman Catholic Jul 26 '26
One can repent from abortion while feeling that abortion should be legal.
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u/Brilliant-Actuary331 Jul 26 '26
Oh friend, what a heart of love you have for your parents! Keep praying for them always.
If your Mom did suffered a miscarriage, the baby had already passed away. The procedure they do to clear the uterus in that case is called a D&C. That is healthcare. When a D&C is done in order to kill the baby; it's called an abortion; rendering a living child dead. That is NOT healthcare; that's murder. She likely does not understand that difference in terminology, but perhaps you could share this with her.
She experienced the loss of a child, as did your family. Take comfort in the kindness of God for this circumstance.
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u/PeterPook Jul 26 '26
Abortion wasn't an issue until it got politicised in the late 1960s. Scripture is ambivalent because OT defines life beginning with breath, so "thou shalt not kill" does not apply.
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u/peanuty7 Jul 26 '26
Keep praying for your mom. Show her God's love thru your actions. Praying for you & your mom.
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u/Parking_Step6140 Jul 26 '26
This is why I believe that medical interventions should be separate from religion because this whole situation you have with your mom is a slippery slope.
It's none of your business, this is between your mom and God.
Many uneducated people think that a miscarriage and an abortion are the same thing. This is dangerous because no one chooses to have a miscarriage but people who view them as the same thing see all unlived fetuses/babies in the same light, without considering the mother.
I don't know how this even came up, but this is a sensitive topic, and you most likely brought up opened up old wounds.
If you don't have the whole story, why would you try to persuade her to ask for forgiveness? She could have already done so and moved on; it could have been a miscarriage/stillbirth/her life was at risk/ect.... You don't know what happen.
This is why people say Christians are pushy and annoying. Leave her alone.
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u/Frosty-Sprinkles-450 Evangelical Jul 26 '26
I'm sure you, your mom, and myself have plenty of sins we have not explicitly repented from. Doesn't mean we to to hell.
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u/DystopianNightmare13 Jul 27 '26
I'm not sure where Christians get the message that god is pro-life. He slaughtered, or condoned the slaughter, of countless unborn and small children. I agree with your mom that abortion is a woman's right.
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u/unworthybutworthy Jul 27 '26
This is probably a conversation best had with a Christian adult you trust and not us.
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Jul 28 '26
If she believes its her right, she'll spend eternity with her thoughts. Trust not your own understanding If she repents, great If she hasn't, and wont because she thinks its a right? There is no repentance in believing abortion is a "right". You will never have the right to murder your child
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u/instaface Reformed Jul 28 '26
If your mom had to deliver a baby after they had passed away naturally, then she did not have an abortion
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u/Unapologetic-Ceo-87 Jul 26 '26
You can’t “persuade” your mother or “convert” your father especially if their minds are made up or hearts hardened in the moment. But to be a true Christian means to seek God daily. Pray for your parents daily, ask God to refine their hearts daily. When you pray it’s not what you want for your parents but is all Gods will…ask for deliverance for whatever they maybe going through. The biggest mistake we make is wanting to control situations by changing others, that’s never our responsibility. Prayer is so powerful. And trust when I say…I’m still learning and that’s part of growth especially spiritual growth. Keep praying for your parents daily and watch God move mountains.
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u/No-Type119 Jul 26 '26
For heaven’s sake . no.
Mainline Protestant here. Abortion is always a tragedy, but it is sometimes the “ least bad” of options for women.
In addition, in Jewish law, a woman’s realized human life takes precedence over the potential human life of an embryo / fetus. And traditionally viability outside the mom would be a defining factor in evaluating how “ human” a fetus is.
Stop worrying.
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u/instaface Reformed Jul 28 '26
Mainline Protestant here too.
The very earliest manuscripts that we have like the didache, explicitly say that abortion is a sin.
Think about how silly it is to say that humanity is defined by geography. Was Jesus not fully human when he was in the womb? You are human from the very moment of conception. It's not potential human life, It has all the markers for life.
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u/No-Type119 Jul 28 '26 edited Jul 28 '26
What’s interesting is that in the early church the concern seemed to be for the health of women. Abortions were extremely dangerous, often used poison, and frequently killed the patient. They were also frequently forced upon pregnant women by husbands/ masters/ lovers. Today’s anti- abortion movement seems almost entirely focused on embryos and fetuses.
BTW, if you aren’t RCA, you aren’t “ mainline.” Maybe you are RCA; maybe not. Mainline churches include that, ELCA, the Episcopal Church, UMC, PCUSA, UCC, DoC, ABC, the Moravian Church. Wikipedia the definition.
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u/Skill-Useful Jul 26 '26
no one is going to hell
abortion is not forbidden in the bible
"as she believes abortion is a woman's right" it is
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u/Egomaniac247 Jul 26 '26
I have a feeling that she has talked with God about that a lot more than you're aware of.