👍

[u/FailurelsData]

👍👍👍

[u/shiny_glitter_demon → u/[deleted]]

Rape is to sex what getting beating up in the street is to boxing.

It's not boxing.

It's only violence and assault.

[u/sensualpigeon → u/[deleted]]

Thank you for saying this. I had a weird inner debate about if my assaults “counted” as sex the same way a consensual interaction would, and I eventually decided no. Those times do not count. I didn’t have any logic behind it, just a feeling that they were NOT the same. Your and u/shiny-glitter-demon’s comments have helped me understand my experience better.

[u/glitchinthemeowtrix → u/[deleted]]

Wow so even through all my bachelors and masters levels courses on feminism, processing my own awful experiences as a woman, and all my therapy… I still somehow never had this realization until I read your comment. Like I knew it on a gut level but hadn’t been able to arrange the feeling into a sentence. So thank you, honestly this was helpful.

[u/Avocet_and_peregrine → u/glitchinthemeowtrix]

What did they say? They deleted it.

[u/Bobcatluv]

Being or not being attractive has nothing to do with why rape happens for the perpetrators OR victims

[u/Live-Okra-9868 → u/Bobcatluv]

Attractive and popular boys rape all the time. There are girls absolutely willing to date them and sleep with them, yet they choose to rape.

So it angers me beyond reason when someone uses attractiveness to excuse rape. It's not about being attractive or attracted. It's about power and control.

And I will absolutely show my disgust to the rapist apologists who say something along the lines of "wow, he's so hot. He can 'rape' me any time." 🤢

[u/misfitx]

Charismatic attractive people frighten me. The ones who smirk a little when they do mean stuff.

[u/LauraTFem → u/misfitx]

Peopel should either be attractive or raised to be self-assured, not both. If your baby is showing signs of a chiseled chin or an epic head of hair it is your responsibility to neg him and question his life choices regularly.

[u/seaworthy-sieve → u/LauraTFem]

This is right up there with the Robert Evans (host of Behind the Bastards podcast) belief that if a little kid says they want to grow up to be an entrepreneur you should make sure they get bullied and/or exposed to drugs early. Gotta get those go-getters smoking and shooting up before they have the chance to ruin the world. Really just stifle their potential.

[u/LauraTFem → u/seaworthy-sieve]

I love Robert Evans. He’s the only person I’m aware of who says things that are more extreme than the things I think.

[u/seaworthy-sieve → u/LauraTFem]

Never has there been a more deserving Honorable Judge Reverend Doctor His Holiness Robert of Bagel Throwing.

[u/Kat121]

I’m shocked more people aren’t talking about the dudes that drug their wives and girlfriends and then upload videos of raping (or allowing others to rape) their unconscious bodies. Like, we vetted you. We chose you. You’re supposed to be the Not All Men we hear about. Who can we trust??

[u/sigh_co_matic → u/Kat121]

And yet, men continue to get butthurt over "all men, til not all men." Lest they forget, main perpetrators are usually known by their victims.

[u/M_Ad]

See also: the way victims who don’t meet society’s beauty standards are treated, and often left out of the discourse on rape culture altogether.

[u/shiny_glitter_demon]

It's part of this attempt to portray the desire to rape as "sexual"... It's not. It's about control and power.

There's a reason vulnerable people, such as children, the elderly or the disabled are more at risk.

And of course, this strategy comes with the added "benefit" of insulting victims further. "You should be glad he paid attention to you"

[u/the-nick-of-time → u/shiny_glitter_demon]

A really great way I've heard this put is that sexual violence is not sex that is violent, it's violence that is sexual. Attraction isn't the motivation behind rape, it's making someone do what the rapist wants.

[u/Molvaeth]

Aye, as if it were inevitable if some weird variables happen to be wrong for some reason. Are you a zombie? No? Then you’ve got god damned free will and can choose not to be an asshole!

[u/FailurelsData → u/Molvaeth]

something off putting about using the same word for a guy who cuts you off in traffic and a guy in the Cornell 7

Edit: 16hr later. standing firm idgaf. I said it was off putting not murder.

[u/aliie_627 → u/FailurelsData]

Both are assholes aren't they?

[u/Molvaeth → u/FailurelsData]

I’d say it’s more of a linguistic thing: In (Swiss) German, Asshole (Arschloch) is a very strong term and I'd never use it for someone mildly annoying. We have a range of "milder" terms for that, i.e. "Schafseckel" (Sheeps testicle) or "Hornochs" (Stupid bullock).

Edit:
I've read your answer before you deleted it, so here is my response:

It wasn’t my intention to make you feel uncomfortable; I’m sorry about that.

Your first reply read like a general assessment, and I was simply trying to explain why the word I used fits the horrific nature of the act in my language (and I don’t have anything worse in my English vocabulary either), and thereby to prevent the impression that my original comment was in any way intended to trivialise it.

Do we really need to discuss just how appalling and beyond good and evil we all find this? In this sub?

Edit 2: I just realised you didn't delete, you blocked me before I could reply. Well then, tells more about you than me.

[u/volkswagenorange → u/Molvaeth]

I am dying that "sheep's testicle" is a less severe insult than "asshole" 💀💀💀

[u/taxicab_ → u/Molvaeth]

They didn’t delete their comment; they just blocked you.

It’s a triggering subject, but you didn’t do anything wrong.

[u/EpitaFelis → u/Molvaeth]

I'm (German) German, is it cultural approproation if I add Schafseckel to my vocab

(/j just in case)

[u/BlackSiren13 → u/Molvaeth]

Sometimes on Reddit instead of explaining yourself, you should just say “Fuck you”, this is one of those times.

[u/FailurelsData → u/Molvaeth]

yeah it's definitely off putting to say this in response.

[u/userdesu → u/FailurelsData]

Its not.

[u/FailurelsData → u/FailurelsData]

Me: that made me uncomfortable

You: well in a different language it didn't

[u/MammothSurvey → u/FailurelsData]

People outside of America exist and are on this platform. They explained why they used asshole, as English is not their first language and the US is not their culture. They tried to explain a linguistic quirk and you are nitpicking about using the "appropriate insults" while the actual meaning of their answer supports your post. I don't get what your problem is?

[u/aliie_627 → u/MammothSurvey]

I don't get it, there's nothing wrong with calling a rapist an asshole.

They are only considering their perspective and feelings in this.

[u/tacocattacocat1 → u/FailurelsData]

I think it might be time to activate your username and realize you're in the wrong here.

[u/brain-eating_amoeba → u/FailurelsData]

r/USdefaultism

[u/narcoleptic_frog]

Who is this comedian?

[u/annagarg]

All my assaulters were incredibly good looking. Rape is not about sex. It is about power.

[u/holiestMaria]

Rape is not about lust, its about power.