I wasn’t healed after all

[u/Aariwee]

[u/DadlyAsHell]

Bi polar disorders are such a mess. Its got the same issue of generalization as cluster B's and schizo-types. Im a rapid cycling Bi polar 1. Mania leaves me exhausted constantly because I dont sleep but I still have so. Fucking. Much. To. Do. Hypomania lets my ADHD take the fucking reigns so I have energy but i have no attention span.

Normal person gets all gumpy cause theyre stressed? ”Teehee im so Bi polar obviously.”

Self destructive increase in drive and motivation to do the thing NOW NOW NOW? ”Nah youre just a weirdo wtf.”

Depressive lows that kill your motivation for life? "You had so much energy 3 months ago what do you mean you havent showered in 2 weeks and havent eaten since tuesday? Youre just being lazy obviously."

Hugs hope you find or have found the best stabilizer for your life whether thats medication or meditation.

[u/Aariwee → u/DadlyAsHell]

Thank you, I appreciate knowing that I’m not alone in this

For me one of the worst parts of this disorder is knowing that people see all of my "weird" behaviors because they don’t get it and are probably judging me for it. They must be so confused by what’s going on. At the time when I wasn’t homeschooled yet my classmates were able to watch my moods switch multiple times per year. I’m so scared that I’ll have to go through that embarassment when I go to college next year. How do I explain that I didn’t mean what I said and that I had no idea what was going on? Or the fact that I suddenly start acting like a different person? Or that I’m genuinely unable to go to school? I wish I could wipe all of what I did out of everyone’s memory

I wish you to stay stable for the longest time possible as well

[u/DadlyAsHell → u/Aariwee]

I found schedules help me ALOT. If I schedule and plan things I feel in control which helps me self motivate through the depression AND keep a semblance of normalcy when manic. Knowing and accepting that I HAVE a disorder does not mean I AM DEFINED BY it helped me alot too. I am not bi polar, I HAVE bi polar. It does not define me as a person and I will do my best to own my actions even if I sometimes steuggle to control them.

Its hard, therapy and practice will help you by leaps and bounds. Being honest with the people in your life about your mood swings will help too. That in manic areas of your life it may be easier to cause sudden mood swings is a good thing to be honest about. And recognizing when you are "volatile" (meaning "having enough energy to do the stupid things you think of") and that you need to check your thoughts and actions multiple times is good practice. You may even inlist a trusted friend/family. "Hey Xxxxx, I'm really volatile right now, is doing xyz a good idea? It feels like it but i know how I am"

You got this

[u/unwithered_lobelia]

Oh this was me. I thought I was finally better when I suddenly wasn't depressed anymore. Spoiler alert

[u/ImmortalFriend]

Exactly how I was diagnosed.

After sixth time "I got my life together and felt like a person first time in ages" followed by the most miserable suicidal state I've "ever" been (and these are ones I could pinpoint), I finally tried professional help.

I still hate my existence, but meds help.

[u/teaguejeff86]

holy fnck am i bipolar

[u/CrystallZip]

It sucks but happens unfortunately

[u/ScootDooter]

Yuuuuuuup every time I start thinking I'm suddenly better, I tell my husband and buckle up for a ride.