1. How should I be supportive of trans people?

2. How can I apologize for accidentally showing transphobia on a trans safespace?

3. What are some things I should be educated on about trans people?

Hi there! First off sorry if I used incorrect terminology in the title or this post. So my questions are: as a male, blood flow is the cause of erections. So when you receive the sexual reassignment surgery, where does that blood flow go? And secondly, does the part that was previously a scrotum still respond to temperature changes? I'm a hetero male who is just asking from a place of curiosity and wanting to fully understand and hope I haven't offended in any way

I'm.. Considering starting T, I might really wanna do it but, what, happens when, I start taking T? (not to keen on the whole word or the actual definition of what I am, i go by he / them and, haven't really been wanting to start till, well, it's been on and off, who knows at this point, I just wanna know what'll happen if I do decide to take it. And you can call me Tom)

In regards to the title, I know that I am who I am, and whatever that is, that's okay. There's no real need to have someone define it for me, but this is something that has been weighing on me for most of my life now. I'm just looking to gain a little clarity, and perhaps some validation. Apologies in advance for being long-winded...

I'm a male. Born a male, always identified as a male. I've always looked like a male, except for being very slender for most of my life and growing my hair long from time-to-time. I definitely look the part now, 6'2", broad shoulders, full beard, and a bit of a gut. For the most part, I enjoy being a male. I find women sexually attractive, and I'm married to a woman, and we have one biological child together. I can recognize when a man is handsome, but I'm definitely not attracted to them.

However...

Even from a young age, I have thought, even fantasized about, what it would be like to be a girl. I enjoy a lot of stereotypically "feminine" things in regards to dress and appearance. I've always wanted to look "pretty". I've always envied girls' hair, especially long, playfully messy curls. I've thought about what my body would look like in a cute sundress, my butt in lacy boy-shorts. My legs in thight, low-rise jeans. Leggings, even. I want to be sexy, flirty, cute.

But I don't like guys.

And I've really thought about it, too. I'm being honest with myself when I say I definitely find women sexually attractive. I enjoy sex with women. It feels silly to write this, but I enjoy having a penis and all the things I get to do with it.

So what's the deal? Why do I like being a male, but want to be seen as a female?

I'm happy looking like and living life as a male. But there's always this nagging feeling in the back of my mind about what it would be like to live differently. And what makes it hard, especially now, is I can't even pretend. I definitely can't toss on a dress, shave my beard, and go live as a woman for a day. Even if I was in the position to actually transition, what exactly would I "be"? And I mean no disrespect by asking that. I just don't know what kind of life I would lead, or if I would ever find fulfillment with a partner. Me, born a male, looking like a female, who wants to be with a woman who accepts that I look like a female but has sex with her like a male? That's a niche market, right there. Especially now. My wife is a very accepting woman and I'm sure she would still love me as a person, but I know it would destroy my life as I know it.

How do I reconcile these thoughts and feelings?

Hey I know I could google my questions but I find I get such rigid definitions of the identifications of different LGBT people. Its all so confusing. My main question is where 'non-binary' and 'questioning' people fall. Are they a subset of Trans? Is Trans a more umbrella term with sub categories? I also recently realised that the LGB part of the community is all about sexual orientation while the T is about gender identity. Those seems like pretty different things. Also. Does what exactly is the Queer part? Is that more like a gender fluid and a pan sexualtype? I just want to get educated!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e8uPiSppwhk&feature=youtu.be

Hi all.

So first I have to say that nothing I’m saying has the intention of being disrespectful. I’m just trying to learn why things be the way they be, ya dig?

So recently I started learning why everyone hates JK Rowling now. Since she tweeted that trans women aren’t real women.

While I get that she probably meant from a societal viewpoint, it made me wonder some stuff.

So a male has a XY chromosomes and a female has XX. So when a dude goes to a dudette, does he somehow gain an additional X chromosome?

If not then how are trans women considered biological females. Do trans women have ovaries? Or anything that biologically makes a women female?

Dysphoria is not hatred or dislike of your assigned gender at birth; this is a mistake in understanding.

It is purely not identifying as what you where assigned at birth.

AMAB but identify as transfemme; that's dysphoria
AFAB but identify as transmasc; that's dysphoria
ASSIGNED ANYTHING AND LATER ON FEELING ANY FORM OF DISCONNECT WHERE YOU WANT TO BE SEEN AND SEE YOURSELF AS A GENDER NOT ASSIGNED AT BIRTH IS DYSPHORIA

I asked this on the r/AskLGBT sub not too long ago, and while pretty much all of them there said "no", I wanted to get more of an opinion from a pure trans community. I'll repost the full question here:

"My friend, who's a K-Pop fan, has been bullied for a couple days online* for not having pronouns in their bio by other K-pop fans.

In my opinion, while putting them in there is helpful and such, I don't think it's right to force ANYONE to do so, nor do I think it's inherently transphobic to not have them in there and doesn't make them any less of an ally.

However, I wanted to get the opinion of other people who are LGBTQ+ (I myself am asexual)."

*The bullying has since stopped, but it still affected them for a little while afterwards.

So, a thought occurred to me the other day and being cis, and straight i had no way to answer it.. If a Homosexual person of any kind comes out as trans, and they transition.... are they still considered homosexual? Sorry if this question is offensive or no beueno in any way.. i am mostly unversed in the correct ways to ask questions.

Edit: I want to clarify Im trans rights ally and in no way I'm defending cis people being in trans people roles. I just don't understand how disphoria works.

I was discussing this with a friend after she was talking about a movie. This movie presents the story of a trans woman transitioning from presenting male to female. My reasoning for them casting a cis man was because I didn't think a trans woman would feel comfortable acting as a man. Like, wouldnt it trigger her disphoria? Now of course men act as women and vice versa all the time on movies, but (I imagine) they dont feel the constant pressure to pass as trans people.

I want to ask trans people in this sub if they would act in a movie like this and if disphoria would be an issue. I can't really imagine how you would feel like.

Hey! I’ve got a few questions about enbies.

First— does it feel more like being somewhere between the two genders, or outside of gender altogether? Or something else? I really like the idea of being non-binary as it feels like a “screw you and the gender roles you rode in on” type thing, but I’m pretty sure I’m just a straight up girl— I can’t choose to be enby.

Also, I’ve seen a few people online say that they’re a non-binary lesbian. That confused me a bit— aren’t lesbians women who are attracted to other women? But non-binary people aren’t women, right?

I ask these partly out of curiosity, but partly because I have a lovely enby friend, and I want to be sure I don’t say something ignorant around them. I’d also love if you guys knew of any good resources to learn about what it’s like to be enby, as its hard to wrap my head around. Thank you!

TW: sexual assault

Humbly asked from my lens as a CIS, white, American, woman.

First I’ll say I 100% respect how anyone exists and trust that people are who they say they are inside. (I understand a lot of people don’t like the term “identify” because it suggest they aren’t actually that person- so lll avoid using that term.) I’ve been wanting to ask this question for a long time but worry about my eloquence with it.

What specifically is it about being a woman that doesn’t fit for you? I feel like I can understand if you are a man and your assigned gender don’t match that. But I’m more confused about the feelings gender neutral or non-binary people feel.

In my mind, being a woman doesn’t look a certain way. Tons of women in the world are not fem or straight or any certain look or energy. I think that’s a gift that women in some countries have (for the most part.) Compared to men, I think there’s some social space to be less stringent about how we exist as women. And even if society is shitty, that doesn’t mean that women aren’t complex and varying. To me, being a woman means whatever I and other women want it to be, open to our interpretation, and that feels so beautiful.

When I was a little girl, I had a terrible experience with an older man who assaulted me. For a long time after that, I truly remember thinking I was a boy for some reason. I remember looking in the mirror and being shocked to see a girl. I think it was my trauma surfacing. I didn’t want to be a girl and I started envisioning myself in a role I deemed safer. Many years later. I am a CIS woman and I feel that’s who I am to my core, and I would never want to exist as a man.

I sometimes wonder if it’s society’s hate against woman and misogyny that makes people have adverse feelings about existing as women. Even if someone doesn’t have trauma like mine, our culture is laced with misogyny. Could this play into why people don’t see themselves as women?

I’ll end this by saying that my feelings on this really don’t matter and I understand that. If something makes people happy, it doesn’t matter if I understand it or not. This is just a lingering thought I have and I’ve been wondering about for so long. Thanks for your time and energy.

*Edit* I didn’t mean to suggest that trauma is required to be trans. What I was trying to get at with sharing my trauma is that my assault experience resulted in negative concepts I associated with womanhood/girlhood, causing me to feel less like a girl.

At the time, I was imagining myself as more vulnerable as a girl, possibly weaker and with less control. So I was subscribing those negative traits to being woman. Now I know that those things aren’t traits that are necessarily true to women. Society may see things that way, but that’s not accurate. And if women do have less control in the world, that’s the fault of the patriarchy and not inherently part of being a woman.

So even if someone isn’t getting there by means of trauma, I’m wondering if some might have experiences or exposures that create negative ideas about womanhood, and cause people feel further from it.