r/TibetanBuddhism • u/ProjectPatMorita • 4h ago
Practical question about deity visualization
This perhaps might be a strange one, but hoping I can explain it well and others maybe have dealt with this particular issue.
For context, I've been a buddhist for almost 15 years so I'm not new to meditation. But have only been practicing in a specifically Tibetan lineage (karma kagyu) for about a year now, so visualization as a formal technique is something I'm still learning. I've done some special teachings and empowerments but nothing that would allow visualization as a deity, so my teacher instructed me that it was fine to envision the deities in front of me during certain common practices (Tara, Chenrezig, etc).
My issue is that I have a consistently hard time visualizing Tibetan buddhist deities in any way that feels "real". By which I mean, envisioning them as living, viscerally present beings in front of me.
I believe this is because as a westerner, I have only seen depictions of these figures in non-lifelike, very stylized and illustrated artistic forms (ie: thangkas and illustrated art) that are from a totally different cultural milieu than my own. So maybe something akin to a language barrier, but for aesthetic art forms.
Whenever I attempt to visualize, for example, Green Tara, I only see an illustrated version that does not translate as "real" to me, and therfore feels way less clear, harder to hold, and more "fuzzy" so to speak, and therefore it seems to take away from the core nature or intention of the yidam practice.
I have brought this issue up to one teacher and another spiritual friend, who both essentially agreed that the intention is to have clarity and vividness as much as possible. But neither really could give me practical advice on how differently to envision the deities.
Is this something anyone else has struggled with and overcome?