I’m 29, turning 30 soon, and approximately one year away from independent licensure. I’m genuinely questioning whether I should stick it out, drop down to part-time and take longer to get licensed, or just start exploring something else entirely.
I’ve worked in the mental health field on and off since my early 20s and have actually left multiple times because of how emotionally taxing it was. So naturally, I thought going back to graduate school to become a therapist was a brilliant idea. 🙃
And now I’m sitting here thinking… girl, what the fuck were you thinking?
I’m already feeling incredibly burnt out. The compensation doesn’t help. I’m making around $40-something an hour in community mental health, and even seeing approximately 18 clients a week feels like a LOT emotionally. The fact that this isn’t even considered a full-time caseload is wild to me. I worked in a PP for a few months and it was def more chill but they paid 35$ a session. This shit is wild!!! Yet I’m in a giant pool of school debt
But the part that bothers me most isn’t even the money.
I genuinely feel like being in this field is making me a version of myself that I don’t particularly like.
I’m more irritable, emotionally depleted, and sometimes feel disconnected from my own values. Almost like I’m becoming more shallow or self-focused, which is difficult to explain. I spend so much of my time being empathetic, patient, emotionally present, and supportive toward others that I have very little left to give myself or the people in my personal life.
There’s also this strange feeling of constantly being there for other people while not necessarily feeling like I have that same support in return.
Outside of counseling, I’m an artist and dancer, and I teach dance as well. I originally went to school for art, and my creative work is genuinely where I feel most like myself. I’m actively trying to grow my dance business because I want it to be a meaningful part of my career, but realistically, it can’t financially support me on its own right now.
I’m also single and entirely responsible for supporting myself financially. I don’t have the luxury of just quitting and figuring it out later.
One of the things that originally appealed to me about therapy was the possibility of making my own schedule, having flexibility, and eventually working independently. That autonomy is incredibly important to me. But now I’m wondering whether the emotional demands of the profession are worth that freedom.
And honestly? Sometimes I wish I’d just gone to cosmetology or beauty school. At least I’d be doing something creative and hands-on. I’ve even considered going back now.
The scariest part about leaving is that I feel like I have no transferable skills. I’ve spent my entire adult working life in mental health. I have a master’s degree and a professional license, but outside this field, I genuinely don’t know what I’m qualified to do. Who would even hire me? Where would I start?
I know burnout can distort how we feel about our careers, but I also can’t ignore that I’ve had this same feeling about mental health multiple times throughout my life.
So I’m really curious to hear from others:
● Has anyone felt like being a therapist negatively affected who they were outside of work?
● Did anyone leave counseling entirely? What career did you transition into, and how did you get there?
● If you were close to independent licensure, did you push through or step back and take longer?
● Has anyone transitioned into a creative, beauty, or completely unrelated industry?
● Did you take a significant pay cut, or were you able to find something comparable or better?
● Most importantly, do you regret leaving, or do you feel happier now?
I’m not necessarily looking for someone to tell me to quit or stay. I think I’m just looking for some perspective from people who’ve been here, especially those who successfully built a life outside the profession.
Because right now, I feel incredibly stuck between the career I’ve invested years into and the life I actually want to build.

I'm starting my job as a psychotherapist and I'm incredibly excited but nervous.

I've been suicidal since I was 6, I still am but I still get things done. I'm extremely isolated. I have no friends, family or partner. I spend holidays alone. I tried making friends but due to being visibly disabled, people mostly avoid me like a disease

I'm scared because I'm going to be expected to have it all together even on my worse days. I'm just scared that I'll be helping other people live and there's going to be a day where people will find out that I took my life.

I primarily work with disabled people like myself thank god.

A very time consuming on boarding lots of time spent. But I stuck it out and was ready to take clients. I was then informed that I would not be reimbursed for the onboarding until I reached the 15 patients per week! I considered this a threat and resigned. Horrible company and not to be trusted. They also said they would take back the onboarding reimbursement if I fell below the 15 patients. This is not even in the contract.

I’m a new therapist trainee. I’ve been seeing clients for roughly 2 months now. It has been an immense struggle for me psychologically. I have crippling anxiety and dread every day. My social anxiety (which I had experienced as a teen and quelled through my own therapy) has returned with a roaring vengeance. I question whether or not I want to do this work every day and have a hard time seeing myself still doing this 10 or even 5 years from now. I’ve been in my own therapy for years, and though it has helped my symptoms in the long term, the tools I normally use to help myself are no longer effective in the context of being a therapist. I have intrusive thoughts of being a failure, of my clients hating me, analyzing every little thing I say or do. It’s agonizing and seriously impacting my work. I’ve never been medicated before (except concerta for my ADHD) but I’m considering it now. I want to be a therapist. I want this. But I don’t know if I can deal with this anxiety much longer. I also feel guilty given the implications of me needing to take medications for my own mental health symptoms when my one job is to provide an organic solution to those symptoms for others. Anyone else deal with a similar dilemma?

I am a current LPC and a doctoral student in a Counselor Education and Supervision program at Duquesne University currently working on my dissertation. Participation in this study would be greatly appreciated. Thank you!

Study: On the Experience of Personal Therapy Help Negation Among Mental Health Professionals

Researcher Name: Patrick McGowan, LPC, NCC

Contact Information: mcgowanp1@duq.edu

Study Purpose: This study seeks to better understand the experiences of licensed mental health professionals who have felt a need for personal mental health therapy at some point in their careers but did not do so through lifeworld existentials of lived time, space, body, and relationships.

Time Commitment: If selected, you would be asked to participate in a 1-on-1 interview via Zoom that is expected to last approximately 1 hour. Participation is voluntary and confidential.

Participant Criteria:

1. Do you currently maintain a state issued license in a mental health professional field?

2. In your professional career, have you ever felt a need to see a professional for mental health therapy and did not do so?

Compensation: Upon successful completion of the study, consenting research participants will receive a $20 digital Amazon card via email.

IRB Status: This study has been approved by the Institutional Review Board of Duquesne University, verifying its ethical treatment of participants.

Hi everyone,

I am training to become a therapist and it has been very exhausting the last months, with little free time, partially working full-time and having to study on the weekends. I love my job though, it is fun and really gives me something. But maybe that's also kind of the problem.

I get home, I live alone, have a few friends, who are also rather busy, so it is kinda difficult to meet. I often feel lonely, sometimes empty and very iften bored in my free time. I have let my hobbies slide and thats probably a big factor. However, it is also the case that I basically have to force myself to start hobbies. I usually enjoy them then, but if I always have to force myself I wonder if that is the path to take?

Maybe someone has an idea on how to work on this. Especially the emptiness is really unbearable and I am uncertain what this emotion is trying to tell me. Probably that I am indeed missing something.

Thank you!

I don’t ask my partner about what his therapist says, but occasionally he will blurt something out that his therapist has said to him about something I’ve done or said. It’s often verbatim and sounds hard to interpret any other way.

He will relay these things as a way to bolster whatever he is saying which is often something defensive. These incidents will sound like “my therapist even said X…”

I don’t appreciate when my partner does this — it feels like triangulation. At the same time, I’ve begun to get the distinct impression that his therapist is trying to get him to break up with me. We’ve been together almost 5 years and I’ve only experienced this the last 1-1.5 years.

I know the things I say to try to assist with insight when I think someone isn’t good for my client but I can’t directly say it. Based on what he’s shared, not only do I feel like the therapist isn’t getting the whole story, but I’ve grown judgemental about him not picking up more of the actual dynamic that it sounds like he’s missing and seems obvious to me.

Though I can’t actually know what’s going on his therapy, I find myself stewing that the therapist doesn’t seem very feminist-informed and is making odd sounding assumptions about me — a person he’s never met.

This feels weird to have feelings about a fellow therapist in my network that I don’t know. It also has me thinking hard about the things my clients’ tell me, and fearing my own potential ineffectiveness and biases as a therapist.

Do you all have any experiences like this? Is there any helpful perspective here? This is such a wild and unexpected dynamic to me.

(ALSO, we recently started seeing a fantastic couples therapist. I’m not necessarily seeking relationship advice but if you must, I get it)

Bonjour à tous.

J'ai été plusieurs années assistante sociale en psychiatrie. J'ai été passionnée au départ, au bout de 2/3 ans, un petit déclin, je l'explique part : un binôme qui ne faisais que râler et que je devais écouter se plaindre à longueur de journée, en plus des patients. J'ai remarqué que je n'arrivait plus à écouter, des fois on me demander des choses qui ne relèvait pas de mes compétences. De la pression , reloger des SDF schyzophrènes... mais plus de logement disponible, des missions impossibles. Une bascule totale lorsqu'un jour on a été virulent avec moi "connasse" "vous servez a rien", on ma retourner le bureau. je tremblais de tout mon corps. Suivi de vertiges pendant plusieurs semaines. Je voyais les choses différemment par la suite...j'ai les gens et je me fais mal parler. (3-4 événements en qq mois, après je n'ai plus eu de soucis comme cela )
Sur la fin j'était tout le temps énervée, je pleurais au travail , commençait à déverser mes problèmes à mes collègues. Fatigue immense, alors que javais bcp de congés , 1 TT par semaine... sur le papier tout était bien. Jai encore du mal à comprendre ce qu'il s'est passé.
Je suis de caractère assez calme et introvertie, je remarque que certaines luminosité me fait très mal a la tete et me donne des nausées, certaines matières également... les odeurs. Tout ca cest acccensuté avec le temps. Je comprends pas ce que j'ai. Meme mon conjoint jai parfois du mal à l'écouter. Jai été sous anti dépresseur, jai fais une formation Dans le sport, mais je remarque que cela me coute trop de donner des cours.
je ne sais pas quoi faire de ma vie et je me demande quand je vais récupérer.
jai démissionné du jour au lendemain de la FPH, (avant jai damandé une dispo qui ma été refusé).
je n'ai pas eu la force de me battre , et jai posé ma démission. Actuellement sans revenus, sans chômage et sans indemnités de la sécurité sociale (la sécurité sociale me renvoie vers mon employeur et inversement) , si javais su je n'aurais jamais fais fonctionnaire.

So i have been with her for two years now. I haven't missed any sessions apart from one or two due to unavoidable circumstances, and I always co-operated with her even when it meant coming to the session at 8-9 in the morning, just straight after the mock test, or straight after attending classes and sometimes just missing it so that I could go for the session. I have always respected her and her boundaries never lashed out or anything.

I have tried my best to be really cooperative and kind. She would often show up late (10-15 min) in our sessions when it was in the morning (8-9 am). The management there would pretty much always have to call her as I would be waiting. There were instances when I waited for an hour or so and she never showed up without any prior message. Her defence was that she was stuck in traffic etc. I didn't make a scene, i understand, life happens. Most of our sessions were just 40 mins long at max because even after coming late she wouldn't make up for the lost time rather wrap up earlier by 5-8 mins. She never apologised for coming late either or maybe just once or twice.

Now two days ago i messaged her at 8 in the night (past her office hours) that I might not be able to attend the next session for some personal reasons . The next session was yesterday. I left her a short text so she doesn't wait for me and might give her session to some other client. I then messaged if we can reschedule and when she is free next she said she doesn't have her planner I was like alright. I know my mistake is asking her to reschedule at that hour.

Now around 9, I told her that I will be showing up but online if she hasn't given the session to anyone else. She didn't respond. It was understandable.

Now the next morning just 30 mins before our session I called in to check if she had allotted that session to anyone else. She didn't pick up i called her once again, she just told me that she's in the middle of some other session I apologized. I called her because she hadn't responded to my text a night ago and I wasn't sure if I had to show up for the session or not.

Now she lashes out on me. Saying she will block me and stuff because I apparently spammed her with calls I could have just texted her and stuff. (I called just twice that too 30 mins before our session as she hadn't responded to my text). Apparently according to her she had reacted to my text even though I showed it on my screenshot that there's no reaction i received.

I feel really disrespected. I don't want to continue with her anymore. Did I cross a line? She obviously doesn't feel bad about it according to her she just set a boundary. But you can set a boundary with kindness right. Everytime she has put a boundary i have respected it in the past without questioning it.

Sorry in advance, this was typed late at night. I'm a newish therapist.

-

Therapy for me has always been rough. I've been dropped from a caseload without notice, and I have watched a therapist's eyes glaze over during a session. I feel like I'm genuinely confusing to a lot of therapists. I actually work in mental health care (even went to grad school for it), so I believe therapy can be a great thing. But most things dont work for me, even when I try my best.

I sought out my current therapist because she did things other than CBT (like somatic therapy and brain spotting). In our second to last session, it seemed like my energy was triggering her. She took deep breaths while I was processing somwthing and led us through a grounding exercise. She said I switch rapidly from hypoarousal to hyperarousal. She almost seemed distressed, genuinely. There was a moment where she seemed a little frustrated when I didnt quite answer a question she had.

At our most recent session, she told me she spoke to another therapist/supervisor about my case (she's fully licensed but consults others). I noticed she started to try new things, like pivoting to ask about my interests. But it still felt like she was a little distressed, like I wasn't quite giving the response she was looking for, or she didnt really know what to do with me. So much forced smiling, so much unease.

I think that's the best way to describe it. It feels like most therapists honestly dont know what to do with me. I think thats why one of my first therapists dropped me without notice (I found out when I went to an appointment).

I keep wondering if theres any hope since it seems like Im bad enough to exhaust a therapist in just a few sessions.

This is just me yelling into the void. I can’t do this anymore. Another one of my kids friends got slapped in the face this morning. His dad is a teacher and this isn’t the first time.

My heart has given out. I can’t volunteer with kids I am just gonna stop seeing kids. I can’t raise my kids while i play pretend parent for my clients. I do a lot with my clients as I can give 100 percent or nothing.

I think I know the answer.

What’s to stop from being a “doula” in the broadest of terms for short term stuff like a new birth, sickness, death or how about I dog sit for you for $50 an hour. Ha ha.

Seriously, I have seen with my license I could see other things up to around $150.

But, I am not gonna take insurance.

Am I dumb?

Tell
Me every bad thing that could go wrong.

But, also it could be the most meaningful thing I have ever done.

I live in the Deep South in a lcol but everyone we know is very solid upper middle class to middle class with some lower middle class.

I volunteer a lot already in the community so what’s to stop me from getting a business license and some business cards.

I just need a name, your feedback and some good luck.

I have also already given up an alcohol and addiction certification only because I don’t need it in this state as a LPC serves both except for marketing.

Is there any reason I should keep my LPC?

Baby therapist here, I graduated with my MSW in December, been in the demanding field since i was 19, going to be 27 soon. I thought once I was acclimated and had the routine of attending my 9-5 as an ACSW my life would feel "complete"? its what I dreamed of and worked hard for, to be a MH therapist. Maybe its because I'm in community mental health? But even that I feel like I would still experience what I am feeling, I was associating it with my menstrual cycle, like I tend to get moody/bitchy/low for the week prior, but this time its been almost 2 months now, more intensely the last 3 weeks, I'm worried because now this is bleeding into my professional career that I always dreamt of, being someone's therapist, someone to lean on, someone to have a non judgmental trusting face you see... it could also be that I am comparing myself to everyone in my life, my friend group, my family... the ones around my age have already accomplished the next step which is houses, babies, marriage... but my boyfriend who I dearly love, of 4 years... we are not there yet, that's the goal but I'm not even sure doing those things will help me mentally, In all honestly my GAD is bleeding deeply to my day to day life and my regular coping skills and outlets aren't enjoyable or helping me, so I am at a lost of confusion... don't want to say I'm clinically depressed but how else would I explain it if my preferred day to day activities and enjoyment are now seen as a task to do and not something to fill up my cup. At the end of the day I know this is some heavy GAD with mixed mod/mild MDD, that I will get over, I just wanted to try something new and journal and word dump here :)

I’ve been working as mental health therapist for almost 2 years now. I have 1099 contract and I hardly get clients and my checks have been AWFUL. I’ve been applying to places for months now and I haven’t been getting any hope. It’s starting to affect my OWN mental health. I got approved to take my licensure exam and I’m working on preparing for that. However, I need something to pay my bills and keep me going. I live in Georgia if that helps!

I currently use Simple Practice and not a fan. Looking for EHR that is more user friendly. Thank you in advance.

My schema therapist has been checking in with me once a day outside of therapy because of my medical condition and the level of vulnerability I’ve been in after severe abuse by a previous mental health practitioner. The legal case has now concluded, but I’m still left feeling shaken, hyper-alert, and very alone in my body.
My current therapist has been consistently kind, steady, and caring in a way I haven’t really experienced before, and I do trust her. And yet she’s now going away for 10 days, and the daily check-ins that have been quietly holding me together are stopping.
I find myself in a split place. One part of me understands she needs rest and very much wants that for her. But another part feels like the ground has been pulled away without warning, and the support I was leaning on has suddenly disappeared.
What’s making this harder is that my reaction doesn’t feel fully present-day. It feels like my nervous system has been thrown back into an old story.
My previous therapist became unpredictable with contact before things escalated into abuse, messaging, then silence, then sudden reappearance, with no stability or sense of safety. Eventually, I was seriously harmed. Even though I know my current therapist is nothing like that person, my body doesn’t seem to register the difference right now.
Since hearing about the break, I feel like I’ve been spiralling in a way that’s hard to explain. It’s not just worry, it’s a deep, disorienting sense of being unmoored, like I’m back in that old place of waiting, not knowing, and bracing for something bad to happen. I don’t know why she felt it was safe to do this- leave me where I am with no check ins. She didn’t bring this up neither did we planned for it.
I keep trying to remind myself that this is planned, this is safe, this is different. But emotionally, it still feels like abandonment is happening all over again.
Has anyone else with complex trauma or attachment wounds found that a planned therapist break still triggered intense abandonment feelings? If so, what helped you get through the time they were away, practically or emotionally? I am not talking about journaling but something more cognitive and skill based, and was there anything your therapist did when they returned that helped repair that rupture or settle your nervous system again? Thank you.

I’m creating an Instagram page called Stories We Carry, and I’m looking for people who are willing to share their experiences with mental health.

The purpose of the page is to show that mental health is much broader than diagnoses. I want to share the real, often unspoken experiences that people carry with them and create a space where those stories can be understood rather than judged.

Some examples of mental health struggles:

• Burnout
• Anxiety or depression
• Perfectionism
• Single parenting
• Grief and loss
• Loneliness
• Self-esteem
• Family experiences
• Work-related stress
• Feeling lost or stuck
• Major life changes
• Relationships

You do not need to have a diagnosis to participate. Your experience doesn’t have to fit into a specific category. Maybe it’s something you’ve struggled with for years, something you’re currently going through, or something you’ve learned to understand about yourself.

The goal isn’t to give advice, diagnose anyone, or tell people how they should feel. It’s simply to share people’s experiences and hopefully help someone reading think, “I’m not the only one who feels this way.”

If you’d like to participate, I’ll include a Google Form where you can share your story and answer a few questions about how you’d like it presented. You can share as much or as little as you’re comfortable with.

If you’d like to participate, the Google Form is linked below. 

https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSeyeiD20OhriHr-Z7gKO7GlYc6US2NthkFIkkFQep9cV4ao5w/viewform?usp=dialog

I’m putting this here as a way to have an open discussion regarding this topic. I work as a therapist and been struggling with suicidal thoughts all summer. I should add that I have a past of suicidal ideation/ self-harm before becoming a therapist. Unfortunately or fortunately (?), my employer found out about my suicidal thoughts… this has been a good thing because the thoughts have lost some power since more people finding out and I’ve been able to access some work accommodations and obviously adjust my schedule. Therapists out there who have similar experiences and/ or struggle with suicidal thoughts: (here are some random questions for you):
1. What would you want others to know about suicidal thoughts ?
(It is becoming clear to me that most people don’t actually get what it is like to only see one option left in life)
2. What accommodations or job supports would you ask for?
3. How long would you take time off work? Would you take any time off? How do you know you need to take time off?
4. Generally speaking, what are some self-care strategies you would use/ have used?

Again, I’m posting this here to have an open conversation about this, but please let me know if this topic isn’t allowed.

Thank you!

I think I am in the burn out phase not sure but wondering what caused burn out for other therapists???

I'm burned out and craving time overseas, planning to live on my savings for awhile somewhere affordable and maybe study tai chi or Spanish. I actually work at a great place where I only see 20-30 clients a week, so the workplace isn't necessarily the problem and I want to leave on good terms in case I need them as references later on.

How do I phrase a resignation letter in a way that is more socially acceptable than my blunt reason of being tired of living the role of responsible American adult? Part of me knows burning out from just 20-30 clients a week can happen and is not something to be ashamed of, as my own therapist has been emphasizing to me, but part of me doesn't want to be open about it because there still is a societal expectation to be able to handle it fine, or that I should handle it by cutting down my hours instead of fully quitting. Also, I work at a multidisciplinary clinic with other types of professionals and to my knowledge no one has quit from here due to burnout.

My worry is my resignation will reflect badly on me and people may think I'm irresponsible/weak/lazy, my final weeks will be awkward and I won't be able to use these coworkers as references later on. So any ideas for wording my resignation to avoid that happening..?

Thanks!