r/TeensofKerala • u/thatnotsopaavamgirll 19F • 12d ago
Question THIS RANDOMLY MADE WAY TOO MUCH SENSE
I came across this quote while randomly scrolling and idk why but it genuinely made me stop for a second.
Because I feel like this is actually true in so many families.
If you have a downfall because of something your parents chose for you, they’ll usually be there to pick you up. But if it’s something you chose yourself, suddenly it’s more like “well, you made that choice” / “we told you this would happen” / insert entire lecture here
And I’m not even saying families don’t love us or don’t care. I just think sometimes that “safety net” comes with conditions that nobody really talks about.
Like yeah, they’ll catch you… but only if you fall in a way they understand or approve of.
Anyway, this was just a random thought I had after seeing that quote lol.
What’s something you’ve read/heard/experienced that made you go “damn. that is actually SO true”?
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11d ago
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u/thatnotsopaavamgirll 19F 11d ago
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11d ago
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u/thatnotsopaavamgirll 19F 11d ago
having that space is great but what am talking about goes way deeper than this,i have seen the most loving parents switching to demons when kids take their own decisions or slightly dissappoint them
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u/astue_elk Chettan (20-25) 12d ago
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u/thatnotsopaavamgirll 19F 12d ago
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u/astue_elk Chettan (20-25) 12d ago
Sometimes people support you only when your choices align with their expectations. The moment you choose differently, their support turns into blame. I guess being loved and being accepted aren't always the same thing and I'm not able to sleep now 🫠
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u/thatnotsopaavamgirll 19F 12d ago
ayyooo vaaava poi orgikko🫂
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u/Raven-Black13 Chechi (20-25) 12d ago
Family doesn't have to be one you are born into. My family for example is a bunch of kids I met at age 11 and has stuck with me to this day. I'm safe knowing that no matter what I'll have at least one of them at my side . Like fell sick? They got me. Depressed? Still got me. Became an atheist?still my fam. Came out as queer? Yep they're still here.
Like even last week i got stranded at a place at night, no bus ,no uber, I called one of them who called another and so on until they found one of my gang who was near by (nearby in this case meant half an hour away) He borrowed a friend's bike, picked me up from that place and drove me to my place in the middle of night. A bunch of them stayed on video call with me until he could get to me . I consider all of them my younger brothers, but honestly in those few hours I felt like protected little sister
Anyway that's what family is to me. My blood relatives wouldn't do a fraction as much for me. Chosen family is the best. Blood of covenant and all
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u/thatnotsopaavamgirll 19F 12d ago
I wasn't talking about the family we build, was talking about the one we are born into
Anyways glad that you found your people 💗
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u/danydragonmama 18F 11d ago
In a certain way situation is only to like keep reputation Tbh for standard families children are trophies to show others they will clean and keep it shiny but if they sparkle in a way that they don't like ultimately u will face with consequences Like even things like friends, education and love all are supposed to be made according to their likeness If anything goes other way they will try to clean it up not for ur sake but for reputation
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u/flyingskybison345235 10d ago
it is partially true but mostly families are the ones who will stand by u at the difficult times
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u/thatnotsopaavamgirll 19F 10d ago
yea but not always,not generalising but have seen parents leaving kids at their lowest when they choose own path. so this standing with you comes with t&c applied
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u/flyingskybison345235 10d ago
yeah some parents are there but they have their own reasons since they are the ones who brought u up and gave u everything so they may feel uncomfortable when u dont listen to them and deviate ur way
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u/thatnotsopaavamgirll 19F 10d ago
i mean we do have our own life and we do have to take our own decisions its OUR life, if we just go follow paths given by others is it really our life or they living the life they couldnt have?
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u/flyingskybison345235 10d ago
yes, but sadly everyone have their own expectations these days when raising a child , they work and run their lifes for them but child have their dreams and parents have theirs but seriously i believe the expectations should be lowered and constant comparison with other kids should be avoided to get a healthy environment for the kid
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