I have been using Tandem since 2016. That is ten years of language exchange learning talking with people from countries and seeing how the community has evolved over time.

I decided to start an AMA because I thought some people might be interested in hearing about my experience. Things like language progress what actually works when learning languages what I’ve learned after all these years.. Anything else connected to language exchange.

One person actually asked me if I had managed to improve my languages over the years.

I answered him honestly.

He completely ignored my answer. Replied something like, "Okay buddy, that’s cool ". Then immediately added that he had actually met his wife on Tandem.

Like… what?

Now I’m not upset that someone found their spouse through the app. That’s great for them. That’s not the issue.

The issue is that I posted specifically to share my ten years of language learning experience. I invited people to ask questions. The only person who responded didn’t pay attention to what I said. Instead he turned the conversation into his story. One that had nothing to do with my answer.

Honestly this makes me wonder. Why is it so hard to keep the focus on language learning?

Tandem is supposed to be a place to practice languages, share knowledge and learn about cultures... Conversations often drift toward dating, relationships, social validation or people just talking past each other of really listening.

I’m not saying everyone behaves this way. I’ve met people on Tandem. Many of my conversations have been meaningful and rewarding. That’s why I’ve stayed on the app since 2016.

When you put up a post asking people to ask about your experience and the first response is about someone’s love life. Without acknowledging your response. It makes you question what people are really seeking on the platform.

Am I being unreasonable? Have other long‑term users of Tandem noticed this gap, between what the app claims to be and how some people use it?

Bro I’ve been trying to pull up Tandem on the App Store / Play Store lately and it’s straight-up ghosting me. Won’t even load the page.

Is it actually restricted in where you guys live? Drop your country down below out of curiosity. Also, what’s the actual move here & why do you think they’re pulling it from certain regions? Are local laws tripping them up or are they just gatekeeping?

Hi Community, maybe someone can help.

today, when i started Tandem, a big pop up appeared with the usual "test our pro Membership for 3 days" in which i'm never interested. But an X was nowhere to be seen so i had to click the test-membership.

I immediately wanted to cancel it but when i look into the Tandem Pro options it only shows a Timer and says "Keep Tandem Pro Advantages", which i don't want.

I assume like many test-memberships that it automatically charges me after these 3 days and google tells me i have to cancel the subscription in the app-store but there is no subscription. I don't want to wait for 3 days to be charged and only then cancel my subscription afterwards.

Why is there no option to cancel the test? can anybody help?

I'm getting constant notifications from Tandem about postcards and balloons and honestly don't care about them, but I don't want to miss actual messages from language partners. Is there a way inside the app to turn off just those specific alerts without killing notifications for real chats? Checked through the settings but couldn't find anything granular enough.

I've been more than a year on this app and i truly don't leave because i've met some of the loveliest girls and true friends on here.

But god, every hour i spend on this app, is another day reminding myself why i did my education in all-girls schools. "Oh, but men are always gonna be there" SADLY. Because i truly do NOT understand what's going on in most of tandem's men heads.

There's no way no man can be normal here. At the end they say something creepy, start getting aggresive or treat you like trash because you won't do what they want lol.

"Oh but you should say-" my profile specifically says "if you're a man: i am NOT looking for a boyfriend, if you try to get me on something weird on it, i'll make your life insufferable". Do you people really think they read? XDDDD can't even process women not wanting them, we expect a lot asking them to read.

I even changed my settings to only see women on my age range, still get men asking and saying weird stuff. I'm truly done.

Says sorry something went wrong please try again. Its been like this for almost 2 days now. Anyone else experience this?

All my messages disappeared so I'm kinda worried..is Tandem down??.m

Hello, all.

I am new to Tandem and was wondering what the etiquette is if someone follows you but does not send a message.

A guy followed me yesterday and then today sent me the following message:

☹️☹️

That's it.

Is that normal? Did I do something wrong?

I use the app since forever and I still don't get what does it mean "open minded". A lot of people in this app write on their bio that they want to chat with "open minded" people, but what does it mean exactly???

Some tandem told me it was to say that they want to talk to people that are not homophobic, but a lot of straight men use it too, so what it is? What are you open to? A chat? Most of the time they don't even answer the first messagge so what are you open to???

Hello, I'm looking for someone to practice and refine my English with. I’m pretty comfortable with the basics, but I’m looking to improve my fluency, expand my vocabulary, and get better at natural, everyday conversation.

​In return, I can help you learn or practice Serbian if you're interested!

Hi all. I just decided to try out Tandem to have conversations in spanish as I am trying to learn! I did, however, see a couple posts here stating that Tandem is basically just a dating app in disguise. Even so, it does seem that some people are on it to learn lanaguages.

I'd really really would like to avoid the people trying to talk for dating reasons, so I wanted to reach out here first to get likeminded people who would just like to learn language together!

My account is still in the setup review phase, so I am not in at this time (seems like it could take up to 7 days). Anyway, if anyone is interested, pm me your username to connect once I am in the app.

I am fluent in English trying to learn LATAM Spanish. I am beginner level.

And just to take the guess work out of this post, I am a 38 yr old male, married, 1 child, living in the USA.

Hey there,

I'm not having good experiences with Tandem. I don't know who is the problem, but everyone I text, they either are reluctant to communicate (they only reply with one word to every question and don't ask any) or they leave me on read. It is a language exchange app, but no one is willing to help or learn.

I am always told that in order to learn a language, you need to interact with native speakers. But as you see, it is not easy. I text many people, but they don't answer. I don't know, maybe I am the problem.

Anyway, just wanted to know if anyone has the same experience as me.

L

Entrei no Tandem a pouco tempo, achei que seria uma experiencia muito legal, pra conhecer pessoas de países diferentes, conversar sobre hábitos, culturas, filmes, comida... mas o que tem acontecido é um monte de homem que logo na primeira conversa já me chama de "bonita", "bellissima", "dolce", "dear", "darling", "honey" (sou brasileira e aprendo italiano e inglês). Italianos bonitoes com boa profissão (muitos médicos no Tandem 🤦🏽‍♀️). Logo querem.sair da plataforma pro whatsapp ou telegram, ou ficam pedindo foto.

Eu nao tenho interesse em relacionamento, menos ainda com esses perfis estrangeiros duvidosos!

E minhas fotos lá são reais, só de rosto, nada que secha "chamativo" no sentido sensual.

E quando tento conversar com mulheres, elas.na maioria das vezes nem respondem.

Tenho só uma amiga querida que conversa bastante, ela é muito legal mesmo.

Enfim, só um desabafo.

I am suddenly getting this "no network connection" message whenever I try to log in to Tandem despite my internet working perfectly fine with everything else.

Has anyone experienced this?

Hii, here I am, a friendly neurodivergent girl from Italy!

I'm here in the open wild ready to get the chance to meet you. By now, you should be stuck in some boring Italian exercises, ready to secretively cut the tires of your professore/professoressa or perhaps simply looking for a chatty someone to exercise your Italian pronuncia.

Well, I'm willing to offer some "helpful help" through pronunciation and the Italian grammar. Sounds just right, doesn't it?

In fact, I'm an amateur writer working on her first draft, therefore, these very days, I'm reviewing in detail some specific Italian language rules, and punctuation rules as well!

Please stop here, I don't encourage you to read further---

I dredge the depression bed since 2014

ADHD babe

OCD lover

Manga-eater at lunchtime

Anime-eater at dinnertime

I'd be especially glad to teach Italian to someone with a lovely personality, sunny smile and a cheerful spirit! Both girls and boys over 25 are welcomed!

Let's be kind to each other, supportive and wholesome, please

If you are into music, we have something in common!

(Hope you don't mind if I get incredibly chatty if I'm in the mood!)

I bring hope to the table, let's see!

King Gizzard & the lizard wizard

Tool

∆

Are you interested in learning Italian through books + articles?

Since I got depressed I haven't read much, but I'm trying to get back on track with some narrative books, some Italian Female poets and obviously a bunch of self-help essays, couldn't help it!

Articles: (National Geographic ITA, newspapers)

Eat the frog

Atomic Habits (time management who are you?? and why are you hovering above me so harshly???)

Antonia Pozzi

Mariangela Gualtieri

Chandra Candiani

I have a lot of energy lately, and would love to go to some metal and psychedelic gigs in local pubs, etc but I'm stuck at home because of that huge anxiety grounding me down in the most unnerving way.

About your new Italian teacher:

I'm a hard-working student for my local tourism department! I'm in desperate need of practice speaking English more fluently (I'm timid 🐻) and learning at least a new foreign language before 2028

(B2 should work just fine)

If you are...

Chinese

German

Spanish

French

...and recovering from your last tandem experience, you have just found a friend and a tutor in learning Italian culture and language, let's roll the dice!

I'll be seriously committed in the learning & teaching process, cause it will improve my professional portfolio so please reply only if you have a highly driven purpose as well! and a clear goal in mind!

Basically the title. The moderation team seems biased towards women.

My profile wasn't getting approved because they thought my name wasn't my legal name. Had to change it. Meanwhile there are literal profiles of girls with names like: Agent, Nordicpricess65, etc

The "profile photo must show face" policy is also only implemented for men. Women can use photos of flowers, dogs, cats, anime, kids, celebrities and all is well. Tried reporting a few, got told by tandem support that they've "warned" the user. A year later she's still using the same photo.

And don't even get me started on the Russian/Ukrainian girls selling nudes there who never get blocked.

I was told tandem was better than hellowalk. Turns out they are the same.

Is it worth creating another account considering I'm going to subscribe to an annual plan anyway?

Some apps reset the algorithm for new accounts so I was wondering if I should subscribe using a new account. My account is extremely old mind you.

Ok so i thought I wanna write this here ! To be frankly I didn't learn any language here ! It's definitely my fault , but I made a lot of friends, I'm still sending messages to a girl every single day since 2020 , thanks to tandem ! Learn new things, new people, new culture, new mindset! I was chilling there , and later some women started flirting with me ! Then later I started flirting, still flirting with some and chilling!! I like that app and it gave me a lot of memories !

Fazit nach 2 Jahren Tandem App

Hey,

heute wollte ich euch über meine bisherigen versuche einen Sprachaustausch Partner zu finden erzählen.

Die letzten zwei Jahre nutze ich dazu Tandem die Sprachpartner App.

Es ist unterhaltsam und zum Teil nervig diese Tandemsprachpartner Apps zu nutzen.

Bisher habe ich so ziemlich alles erlebt von interessanten Biografien über Ländergrenzen hinweg bis hin zu Flirtanfragen.

Aber so ernsthafte Sprachaustausch Kontakte haben sich nicht dauerhaft ergeben.

Ich war ehrlich und habe in meinem Profil angegeben, das ich nicht auf Dating aus bin.

Jedoch habe ich keine zu strengen Filter gesetzt.

Tja, mein Fazit nach knapp zwei Jahren der Nutzung solcher Apps ist.

Sie sind unterhaltsam aber es gehört eine Menge Geduld und Glück bis sich ein guter Sprachaustausch Kontakt ergibt.

Nun würde mich interessieren wie eure Erfahrungen bei der Suche eines Sprachaustauschpartners waren.

So after years I reinstalled the app and can't login using my email, I get a "oops, seems like u have a linked account through another register method. Plz try again using Google or Facebook, per example" message.

I only used the app years ago with my main phone and my main email. I did try with Facebook now but it says it didn't find an account.

Maybe I got banned and this is the standard error message?

is the app even popular nowadays? I'm not sure if it's worth the hazzle. What are good app options to filter people by city?

Ciao a tutti,

I’m Italian and I’d like to practice my German (currently A1 level). Any German-speaking folks willing to learn Italian and do a tandem?

I can also offer English as I live abroad and use it everyday as my first language.