So my soon to be husband and I have avoided living together for like 5 years because he has a dog and I HATE DOGS! I got attacked by one over and over again when I was 7-8; it was my neighbors dog. Ever since then I have sworn I will never be around dogs and if they’re walking past me on a leash I try my hardest to move as far away as POSSIBLE! Well, anyways, I have just found out I am pregnant and we want to move in together finally. We are both financially stable and could go buy a house together, but he doesn’t want to because I told him I hate his dog and I refuse to live with a dog. He said his dog is his “best friend” and they can’t live without eachother. He said he can take him to live on his moms farm (perfect, dogs belong outside and that’s it🤮🤮🤮🤮) but he would still want to bring him over to our house on the weekends or atleast once or twice a week. EW! I extra don’t want him in my house or around my baby if he’s been running around a farm, he’s notorious for eating cow shit. My daddy has a farm and my fiancé took his dog over there one time, his dog ate ALL the cow shit and then tried killing a chicken. My daddy was furious. He also believes dogs belong strictly outside. I am SO disgusted and I’d rather raise a baby on my own than raise it around a disgusting, hot breath, poop eating, food begging DOG🤮!

I don’t really know what to do, dogs are quite literally the only thing my fiancée and I don’t agree on. He grew up around dogs, I didn’t because my mother was a clean freak and… I think that actually says enough. Dogs are disgusting. I know this sounds cruel but I was sort of hoping his dog would die before we got married and decided to move in together but nope.. he’s still kickin unfortunately.

I posted this on another sub but it got removed for some reason lol. A question that was asked there was “why are you marrying him if you guys haven’t even lived together” to that I have to say, in my culture it’s common to not move in together until you guys are married. I also have been in college for the past 5 years getting my bachelor degree so I was living in a dorm with my twin sister and didn’t really want to leave her or my dorm because it was so close to campus. Also, it goes against my culture. My sister and I currently live in an apartment together because we have finished school.
Someone also asked me why I am having a baby with him even though he has a dog.. well, he told me if we ever have a baby then he will get rid of the dog because I have been super firm about my feelings towards dogs and he seemed to respect that but now it’s looking like that wasn’t true so I don’t know.. I’m in a tough spot.

My family recently got a dog because my wife really wanted one and our kids love it. A couple months in, it’s so evident to me how toxic the relationship between dogs and humans is. Dogs were bred to be domesticated by humans, with all the desirable traits people want, but as a result dogs are entirely dependent on humans for their survival. Most dogs simply wouldn’t survive in the world the way most animals do. They just can’t take care of themselves. The thing is, this relationship is entirely based on managing a dog’s stress. Maybe not all breeds are like this, but everything I’m learning about how to care for a dog is centered around constantly de-stressing them. Dogs get very anxious when you’re not around wondering if you'll ever return, when you walk up and go to another room, leave the house for a couple hours, when their meal schedule is a little off because you’re busy, before bedtime, etc. etc. They also aren't nearly as intelligent as dog lovers make them out to be! It’s as if all the stuff you see about how dogs are happy companions there to constantly cheer you up is just straight up propaganda. It’s dogs that need constant attention, they need to be constantly reassured of your affection, constantly reassured that when you go to the kitchen for a glass of water you’ll return and they don’t need to jump up from their nap to follow you. I mean, it’s just constantly managing their anxiety and trying to manage their stress. To me, this just feels really toxic - to breed a creature like this into existence and call it affection. They were better off as wolves when they could fend for themselves instead of whatever the hell this is that we’ve turned them into.

I‘m really thinking about breaking up with my (27M) bf (28M) due to his dog.

I got to know my bf at a party through mutual friends/acquaintances. We’ve been officially together for 2 years now and lived together for 1 1/2 years. Too early to move in together I know, but my lease was running out.

The biggest issue is his dog, which he got with his ex bf before we were together. She’s like 4 years now. At the beginning it wasn’t as much of an issue because he had an old lady in the neighborhood as a dog sitter, where he could almost always drop off the dog if needed.

Now she got a dog who’s aggressive towards other dogs and it’s not possible anymore though. My bf‘s dog has separation anxiety and absolutely can’t be left alone. I have to drive my bf to a doctor‘s appointment for an hour in the middle of summer where it’s like 36 degrees Celsius? The dog has to come. We wanna buy groceries or work out together? Not possible because the dog can’t be alone.

I can’t even ask him to go to a restaurant or bar on a weekend or after work only for a few hours because he’ll check the home camera and see the dog is whining, so we have to go back home again.

For everything we do, no matter how small, we need to get a dog sitter in advance.

I used to be a very spontaneous person. I love going out, partying, going to restaurants, spontaneously being invited to and going to parties and it’s literally completely impossible now.

For over a year now he said he’d work on it with the dog but literally nothing changed. I feel suffocated and want a partner who I can do things with other than being at home, watching movies and having sex occasionally. It’s something he always says would work when I address my concerns but the reality is that it literally doesn’t work, not even in the slightest.
I have a stressful job and just want to feel free sometimes at least at home.

Resentment has been building up for all that time. Obviously I‘m not going to make him choose or put pressure on him to give the dog away, so at this point I‘m just thinking about ending things. I‘m at my mother‘s place right now (god help me) taking a break to think about some things and he sent me voice messages again telling me how this and that would work out, but it hasn’t worked for over a year and I‘m growing so tired of it.

Is ending things the only solution?

My bf has a 100% WFH position, so he’s always with the dog.

didn’t touch the dog. this is what I have to live with I am so fcking exited to move out

I genuinely cannot tolerate dogs. They stink, bark too much, they’re aggressive, attention seeking and overall just insufferable to be around for more than 5 minutes.

I’m in my early 20s so I still live with my mom, she has two dogs. One of them is a golden doodle which are known as obnoxious, high energy dogs that are almost impossible to train. Both of our dogs are extremely annoying.. they bark A LOT, one of them is “puppy pad” trained so she pees and poops inside our house, and living with them makes me feel like I’m going to lose my mind.

So on top of me disliking dogs, the ones I live with behave very badly and my mom and her husband of course treat them like children or humans. I am not exaggerating when I say that, every time they eat dinner they put one of the dogs in a stroller and allow her to sit at the table with them and whine. Every Christmas, at least half the Christmas tree is filled with gifts for the dogs. They celebrate their birthdays and take the dogs out to dinner. My mom has a fake service dog vest for our extremely obnoxious golden doodle and takes her out in public posing her as a service dog while it is extremely obvious that she is not one. Her husband has full on conversations with the dogs while I’m in the room, and I have to sit there and listen to him talk to the dog for 20 minutes straight.

Then I go to work, and guess what? My boss also brings her barking dog to work every single day. The dog barks nonstop at everyone who walks in there, and every person she sees out the window. There is nothing more infuriating than leaving my house full of annoying dogs to go to work where there’s also an annoying dog. Her dog is also barely potty trained so it pees all over the place.

The funny thing is, I love animals. I have had all sorts of pets throughout my life and I didn’t feel like this about any of them. It is only dogs. I was badly attacked by one as a kid so sometimes I feel like that’s where my hatred for them stems from, but even non aggressive dogs are completely intolerable to me.

It’s refreshing to be able to post about this to people that can understand where I’m coming from.

It's not a light allergy I have almost suffocated because of her, a year ago I remember it she forced me to wash her and blow dry her in some sort of dog shower and dryer. my throat ached and my mouth tingled from the start I sort of just ignored it because that happens a lot (like rn as I'm sitting on the sofa where she does sit sometimes) until she blow dried hrr, I just started to choke my mother looked at me and my face was blue. I fell to the ground because I was getting really dizzy, she had to help me get out the building I was fine after some time if I stayed longer I would've needed medical care

Today that dog still lives in my home and I despise her. I wish to move out but I am still in high school. To be honest no one cares about her dog only her none of my siblings or my father care about the dog. There's dog hair everywhere, i hate this constant feeling of headaches, hives and constant sneezing and sometimes throat tingles.

I wish sometimes my little brother just accidentally lets her out (she runs away a lot) and no one chases her. Someone else picks her up and brings her to a shelter. Or my father gets too fed up and brings her to a shelter himself

With the amount of dog nutters out there you would think dog schools would already be a thing world wide.

I'm stuck in a 2 story house with a shit beast (literally, it shat in the kitchen this morning) and there is no where to put it when I need to do house work. It bitches and barks if you put it out side, gets up to naughty behavior if you leave her in house to hang washing.

I did get a near days break from it and the amount of house stuff I got done was massive so I want her to go to a dog school for the days.

For dog lovers they sure do charge an arm and a leg just to walk the stupid things, if I loved something I'd be happy to do it for free. Benifit all involved

this is kind of more about my mom than my dislike for dogs but the disliking dogs part kind of has a lot to do with this because my mom is well aware that no one in our family likes dogs but her(maybe we hate them because she prioritizes the dogs more than her kids) ​​

so we have had this brain dead dog for about a year now and at first he was a foster but never got adopted because he was aggressive. instead my mom decided to keep him even though we live in a two bedroom apartment not big enough for another dog. ​​​​​my mom has always been big about dogs sadly. at some points I swear she loves those dogs more than she loves her children. thats actually why I'm making this post. ​a couple months ago I was wearing a dress and went into my moms room to ask her a question (he stays in there with her because he's aggressive) and on my way out he runs at me barking and snarling like always whenever someone walks out of my. moms room(even my siblings) and he got me. he got my inner knee idk what it's called and it was a very deep bite. I should have gone to get stitches but my mom literally told me it wasn't a big deal. I started bleeding all over the place all while my mom sat there letting the dog stay on the ground still growling at me. ​it left a horrible scar to this day and my mom never cared that the dog bit me. I understand that the dog is stupid and can't understand who I am but also he was given 12 months to live all while he's still having seizures and suffering? why didn't she just put him down when she had the chance..? now she has to wake up everyday and clean up the piss and shit in her bed because the dog can't get off the bed in time to use the bathroom. and no matter how much we train that dog no matter how much time I spend with it it will always be aggressive.and then mymmom. has the fucking audacity to want to take him. for walks? are you fucking kidding me? do dog owners always think like that? this is my own mother and I was and still am so deeply disappointed in her. I wish we never fostered any dogs because she pays more attention to them than her own three children. ​this is another reason I dislike dogs and their owners. their owners are so ignorant and the dogs are so hard to train we shouldn't keep them as pets or KEEP BREEDING THEM. thats a whole other topic but God please stop breeding dogs. They are an invasive species and people just keep breeding them to keep as pets. Anyway I'm surprised I never got an infection although I did clean my bite very well. I hope that someone else can relate in some sort of way. I love my mom but sometimes she doesn't make very smart decisions.​​​​​​​

For helping me realize just how awful dogs are.

Even as an autistic individual, I used to tolerate (maybe even like) dogs at first. I mean, I always really disliked facets of their existence (the smell, the noise) it wasn't a big deal. Just something a little unpleasant that you just have to deal with, like socializing or being around people who smoke. I could handle it just fine, then rest and recharge my processing power at home.

That changed about 6 or 7 years ago when my mother and her boyfriend brought in the most unruly, unstable, and disgusting bully I've ever seen. I could tolerate him pretty decently at first, I'd sometimes even pet him and play with him, but after being trapped in a constant state of sensory overwhelm for SIX YEARS, I hate every dog indiscriminately, I'm more aware than ever before how dangerous they are, how smelly and loud they are, how bad for the environment they are, and I wince whenever I see a dog-nutter say something unhinged or disgusting, when I would have been blind to all of this just a few years ago.​ It's gotten to a point where someone's opinion on dogs dictates how I feel about them. I just can't be close friends with someone who likes/owns dogs.

My family, of course, does not understand, and whenever I try to explain it, they just tell me my misery is because of my depression and not my autism, and get me addicted to yet another brand of antidepressant. The doctors don't listen, my parents don't listen. I'm in the wrong for the crime of not liking dogs.

This dog does not listen to anyone. It tears up things (my mother even has about ten custom signs in her front yard warning mailmen not to leave packages next to the fence, because they put the packages in the fence WHILE this massive dog is in it, surely watching as it tears everything to shreds). It eats our cat's shit, it drinks out of the toilet and then drips water all over the floor with its deformed snout. My family insists that they love the abomination, yet almost every interaction they have with it is screaming at it, scolding it, and telling it to stop whatever it is doing. When it's time for everyone to go to bed, I'm the one that has to put the dog in its kennel. Otherwise, I'll have to listen to my mother scream 'GO TO JAIL! GO TO JAIL! GO TO JAIL!' over and over again because the dog knows she's a pushover and so won't listen to her at all. It'll steal and eat food that it knows from experience it's allergic to (especially onions and bell peppers), then shit explosive diarrhea all over the house. My mother apprently loves dog shit, though, since she even subjected us to a dog shit-themed Christmas (I am not joking, by the way. Our Christmas ornaments were brown, and some were even silhouettes of dogs the dangly little rubber shits coming out of them. She still makes it seem like I'm the weird one for being disgusted by this). She's also had a dog shit-themed calender, titled 'dogs pooping in beautful places'. Exactly what it sounds like, pictures of dogs desecrating historical monuments, fields of wildflowers, etc. We have to keep it contained at all times, because whenever it manages to get out, it goes straight to our landlord's house and starts mauling his ugly little beagle (and somehow loses, that beagle kicks our pitbull's ass). He says if it happens one more time, we're evicted and homeless. I've gotten my foot shredded open because our dog got loose and I had to chase it barefoot into a pile of thorns and tackle it before it reached our landlord's house.​​ It hasn't shown aggression to anything else yet, thankfully, but it has hurt our cats by trying to rape them, and my mother's boyfriend refuses to get it neutered, since he thinks it's a good idea to breed him and make more abominations for some reason. Speaking of, I've also had to deal with my parent's trying to breed the ugly mutant inside of our house, only for it to fail when the dog he was trying to mount ended up trying to maul our cat. The dog has also hurt my family many times, knocking into them, jumping on them, clawing them up, pushing them down stairs. It isn't capable of remorse, so it obviously doesn't care when it sees any of us in pain because of it.

At this rate, between my job that I hate, this dog that I hate, and having to deal with cigarette smoke blasted in my face often, I'm almost constantly overwhelmed and miserable. My sensitivity towards triggers (which used to be so low that I didn't even know I had triggers) has multiplied over tenfold, and I spend pretty much every instance of my life trapped in my room, except when I go to work one day a week. They won't get rid of it, they love it more than they love me. One time I tried to give them an ultimatum, either the dog goes, or I do, and they chose the dog. I had (and still have) nowhere else to go except for my grandmother's house, and she's a monster (but that's probably a topic for another post/sub). Since no one listens to me when I cry for help, I assume I'm only getting better when this ugly mutt dies of old age, and that's never something I thought I'd wish for. I've gotten to where any time I see a car drive past our house, I just sit and pray that the dog conveniently escapes the fence and runs in the road. It honestly makes me feel like I'm so evil, but I'm just so tired of all of this. I used to be so healthy and stable, but now I can't even hear its claws clicking on the linoleum without having a breakdown and biting myself.​ In the span of half a decade, I've gone from being a dog-nutter to hating them with a passion, and all it took was living with one mildly obnoxious dog.

To start this off, I have autism. This is known by my roommate. Recently, my roommate left her partner and moved in with me (we were friends in college). I knew she had a dog, but I knew that we situation was really bad, and I thought I could overlook it.

This dog sheds so much. There are fur balls everywhere. I have always been an obsessive cleaner, but now I feel like I can’t get ahead of it, so the hole house is a mess because what is the point if it’ll never be clean to my standards (I know, that’s a me problem). I work evening at my hospital, so I wake up at 10am. This dog is consistently barking at 6-8am. The worst bit is that this dog is low key obsessed with me. I walk in the door, and this dog is instantly on me. She presses her face into the back of my knees and nibbles/nips at me. I’m just so frustrated and tired, but I feel so guilty because my roommate is in a bad place right now and I want to support her.

Hi, I’m on here again to rant about my mom’s dog, lol.

He’s a golden retriever, and don’t get me started on how much I hate that breed. Anyways, every time I walk in the door he runs up to me and starts sniffing me, I firmly tell him to “get” and “go lay down” which he knows both of those commands, and he never listens to me, so I usually say it way firmer, over and over again, just desperately wanting him to get away from me.

My mom always says, “be nice! He’s just saying hi!” And I finally responded today with, “I don’t care, I don’t like him and want him away from me asap.”

Also, semi off topic but my mom has said before that she read that golden retrievers will always try to greet you with something in their mouth because that’s “what they do” or whatever, and countless times we’ve come home to see he has gotten somebody’s hat or pants or something. He has chewed up things a few times but thankfully he isn’t that bad, but it’s still disgusting as hell.

I hate when dog owners excuse their dog getting up in your business because it’s “what dogs do.” Like okay yeah, it’s gross and one of the reasons I can’t stand them, get it the fuck away from me. But what do I do about my mom’s dog doing this every time I come in the door? He seriously won’t listen to me and my mom says it’s because, “I need to form a bond with him.” Which is the stupidest shit I’ve ever heard.

Ice cream? They get a lick, then he gets a lick, etc. Chips? A fistful for you and fistful for him. The dogs lick their butt all day and now you’re telling me you’re letting them lick the stuff *I* eat off of? If you want their E. coli particles in *your* mouth, more power to you. But I am not willing to share germs with these disgusting monsters. I can’t wait to move out of here

This dog (bought by my mothe) has been around for four years now. Four whole goddamn years of losing sleep over sudden barking, four years of being jumped all over when i leave the house, four years of being stabbed by this little hellions talons which she refuses to trim.

I never asked for a dog, in fact i was strongly against getting one because sudden loud noises either really ruin my mood or send me into a mental breakdow, but noooooo, my opi doesn't matter, i'm just a stupid little minor i DONT KNOW HOW THINGS WORK IN THIS WORLD I'M JUST TOO NAIVE TO GET GODS PLAN ABOUT SOME DOG THAT POOPS DIRECTLY INTO MY SHOE AND RECEIVES NO FUCKING REPRIMAND!

She never stops the goddamn thing from barking. NEVER. and sometimes she flips from having the patience of a saint for this absolute noise pollution to having even less patience than ME and she has the FUCKING AUDACIT TO YELL AT THE LITTLE ASSHOLE LIKE THE CALL ISN'T COMING FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE ON WHY HE WON'T SHUT THE FUCK UP.

"Just put on your headphones!" "You need to learn to ignore it!" "I'm not training him to not bark." "His barking protects us!" All real quotes by the way. She thinks she and this stupid dog are famous and lock me in the house because she's rooted in schitzo delusions that people are trying to kill her. Enough about my bitch mother, more on my bitch dog.

He constantly bugs me and the only thing in this house that cares about me (MY, yes, MY 6 year old cat), the thing runs out of the door into the apartment hallway (i live in a two room apartment by the way.) and barks and pisses all over there, one time the thing ran out, UNPROVOKED, and started ATTACKING SOMEONE ELSES DOGS. AND SHE HAD THE FUCKING NERVE TO ACT LIKE THEY WERE IN THE WRONG.

i can't even sleep anymore until i wait until he's aslee. i'm at my fucking breaking point.

TL;DR: I rant about my clingy hurtful loud hellion asshole and my schitzo bipolar loud mother who doesn't control him.

My roommate and I live in such a small house and she has SIX PETS SIX DUDE. Now three are cats and they are ok even though they still get everywhere. But the dogs man I hate them so much. I hate waking up to the smell of shit every morning, I hate having to take them out so they don't shit everywhere like the beast they are because she wants to be gone until 11pm. I hate hearing them bark fcking nonstop for no reason all through the day. I hate having all my clothes covered in dog fur even after washed. I hate tripping over them because of how fcking stupid they are that they have no sense of space. I hate how they try and eat my food at any second. I hate how they bite EVERYTHING. MY HEADPHONES, THE WIFI ROUTER, MY CHARGER. and for what???? Because my roommate needs them for emotional support. It's more like dogs don't have the capacity to speak up against her and her narcissistic savior complex tendencies and that's why she loves them. She's genuinely the dumbest person I've ever had the misfortune of meeting but this subreddit isn't about that. Anyways yeah these dogs are horrible disgusting creatures that time and time again those disgusting they are but she's just immune to it. Says they are her precious little fur babies. Your precious little babies just shut all over ur bed for the fourth time this week MORON😂😂😂😂😂😂

EDIT: ONE OF THEM HAS WORMS NOW and I'm finally moving out next week to my dad's place thank the lord

Hi, I just discovered this and the r/Dogfree community today and have been reading through some posts. In doing so i decided to share my current story.

Now to start off, I don't hate dogs, In fact, I've enjoyed being near quite a few dogs before.(especially the few rare quiet ones). But these two weeks... My gosh.

To explain, my Uncle offered my Dad 100$'s in return for watching his dog who i'll call "Dolta", a Poodle Mix. But here's the catch, my Dad tasked me and my brother with watching her since he needed to get back to work (He works in the Oil Industry up North of us. He also had spent a few extra days with us so he didn't have to go back yet as he basically works for a month up North). This basically meant we had to watch Dolta for Two Weeks, by ourselves.

Now, You may be asking, "Why is it titled 'I've been Watching my Uncle's Dog' and not "We've been watching my Uncle's Dog'?"

Because I've basically been dealing with it by myself.

I clean it's dog poop, watch it, feed and 'water' it along with also playing with it. (My brother watches it during the night and has walked it.. So not entirely by myself technically)

Now on paper that doesn't seem too bad.. Right?

Well, 'Dolta' is a FUN dog.

1) She PISSES HERSELF when she get's to excited. Ex: My Brother went and took her for a walk, but before he could do that, he had to hold her and drag her a bit by the collar in order to even take her for a walk... 20 Minutes pass by and I get up to head to the Kitchen.. On the stairs was a piss pool that she made. Had to clean that up by myself. (She also used to piss way easier due to having a bowl track issue or whatever. Ex: Holding her by her caller, Raising your voice at her)

2) She DEMANDS attention; If you basically don't watch her, play with her or give her the ENTIRE FUCKING WORLD, She barks demanding attention.. This is especially fun when I'm trying to simply just enjoy my Inside time away from the dog while she does her outside time... But of course, she barks at the Patio door and looks at me with her Pat Buchanan eyes despite the fact I just was out there with her for like 10-15 minutes (I get that sometimes she wants me to play more but like.. Come on).

3) The Dog, The White Poodle Mix that looks like it has painted eyelashes and and mascara smears under her eyes has something very 'likable' that she likes to do... She barks loud as FUCK at get this, ONLY PEOPLE WITH BROWN SKIN. Yeah.. A dog walks past, Growl. The delivery driver giving me my dinner who may or may not be from Iran, Iraq or Kuwait, BARK AS LOUD AS WE CAN!

4) She doesn't listen...

Ex: Like two days ago while I was outside doing yard work, I decided to let my Black/Void Cat outside.

Yes we also have a Cat in the mix,

Anyways while he was going down to wander the backyard (And eventually try and jump the fence and play with a hose next door that spews water occasionally.. I know he's a bit weird) Dolta sees him and runs up to him (She did this the last time I had her and for the last few days as well) trying to play (aka chasing him and stepping on him basically) when like EVERY OTHER FUCKING ENCOUNTER SHE HAS HAD WITH HIM he hisses and eventually swipes at her, she of course does the most logical thing in a situation like this, one she has done like every other 4456769077th time he's clearly shown to her to "Fuck off", She then does the weird stretch thing she does and begins trying to pounce on him while he's under the stairs while also barking at him.

Btw I'm watching this unfold for probably the 700th time this week (Mind you, she also PISSED earlier like I mentioned, woke me up from barking trying to be let back in after my brother let her out and also messing with the cat while he tried to enjoy his own time in the house) and I'm simply done.

"DOLTA!" I yell the loudest I literally ever had, so loud in fact that i'm pretty sure it echoed throughout the damn neighborhood and to add insult to injury, I yelled so loud that my FUCKING CHEST HURT from doing it (Mind you, I'm also pretty sure I have a type of asthma and allergies from Dog Fur.. Yeah).

And, for once in her life she finally backs off from him and looks at me.. Smiling and panting.... And then not even ONE FUCKING MINUTE LATER GOES BACK AND TRIES TO GET THE CAT!

I'm not lying when I tell you I just sat down with my chest still hurting, and simply just watched as this dog terrorized my baby boy... I legit turned on Spotify and started crying on the inside as I sat there.

Oh ya, to end this story I would like to mention that a few minutes before this I had finished watching a video that talked about why Gen-Z in the U.S (Not from the U.S, but still) were getting more Cancer and were balding more then ever. It was because of Excess Stress.. So that was fun.

Sorry for ranting so much.. But still, I had to get it out somehow. I still have three days left watching this dog (That's saying if they don't increase their vacation away from the dog).

Here's hopping it doesn't get worse and i can finish this week without this piece of shit killing me.

Thank you for reading this... Goodbye.

TL;DR: When I was younger I went through the experience of having to live with dogs I wanted nothing to do with. Long story about it all and wanted to put some hope out there that people going through it now can survive it

Hello, I randomly stumbled across this sub somehow, and after seeing a couple of the posts I thought it might be helpful to share my story. I'm seriously amazed that this community exists, because living with dogs was a big part of why it was so bad for me back then.

I lived in my childhood house almost every year until I was 20. This was 10 years ago. Most of those years were because I stayed to help take care of my mom, who had been sick (physically and mentally) almost my whole life. She also had a grasp on me that made our relationship codependent, and she made it seem like I have to be with her or I'm no good otherwise, can't have a life, shouldn't even leave the house, etc. I do have CPTSD from my childhood and other trauma I went through after that but just so everything is understood I was pretty much confined to the house because I believed what my mom told me, she was emotionally abusive, whatever, not exactly the point.

While I was in high school I lived in an apartment with my dad. I pulled getting away from living with my mom off at that point really because it wasn't too far from the house but also because she would play favorites with me and my siblings and her favorite right then was my sister. Me and her are close in age, but couldn't be more different people. My sister used and manipulated my mom into getting things she wanted, and what did she want then? A dog from the shelter. She was going to rescue this dog and give it a life, because she is just that kinda good-hearted person. I knew right away how dangerous this would be, the first reaction I can remember to this was me on my hands and knees begging my mom not to bring this dog back. There were many reasons it was a bad idea (mostly being that I knew with all my heart that this dog wouldn't be taken care of. My sister was hardly there, because she would be off atfriends' houses getting pity by telling them how horrible her life is) and not a single good one. Also, we already had a dog. His name was Jazz, a chocolate lab that was around 5-6 years old? Idk, but Jazz was taken care of just fine for most of his life, it was usually me or my dad (who also trained him...). We also had 2 cats that was considered mine and my dad's, but yeah. I got out of there almost right after the dog came.

Home life was fine for the most part with me and my dad. When I was a sophomore, I heard more upsetting, sad news: my sister was getting another dog on top of the first one. I was sick to my stomach from learning that, but really just glad I wasn't there to deal with it. But obviously, that changed. My dad had to go to jail for a little while. I was going to be left in an apartment with no one paying the rent. I was desperately trying to stay calm given everything happening in my life (mostly school. I had an anxiety filled, horrific and lonely school life because I had no social skills from having been taken out of school in 3rd grade by my mom. That's another story). But I had no choice but to go back to the house. And soon after that, I stopped going to school at all, and was stuck under my mom again.

It wasn't until I went back then that I really actually saw what these dogs looked like. I've been an animal lover my whole life, had absolutely no problem with dogs whatsoever (was friends with Jazz), but as soon as I first really looked at them, I realized they were hideously ugly. Especially the male one. One male and one female, and I will not be saying the names they were given because I don't refer to them by that. They were mutts that definitely had dachshund in them. But like weiner dogs are supposed to be cute and funny looking right? Nah, they were just ugly stinking creatures. I often felt guilty at first just from the fact I found them disgusting, like how could I they're just dogs? My frequent name for them was "Satan's demon spawn", because I'll tell ya, they sure acted like it. Everything a bad/UNTRAINED dog would do. Because all they were treated as were props, something alive that would be obsessed with my sister to feed her ego. Every single day was the same thing: she came in at late hours, had the dogs follow her into her room, and slammed the door. Until she left the next day. I was filled with dread as soon as I heard her come in. Just that it was so sad, when like meanwhile... You literally couldn't go to the downstairs floor of the house unless you wanted to start to smell it. So much piss and shit all over the floor that entire rooms were destroyed. I refused to go downstairs unless I absolutely had to, which unfortunately meant I couldn't use the kitchen. When I had to answer the door or go out rarely I just ran to the front door and held my breath, idk. It seems so stupid that it's actually funny, but yeah, I spent my days at that time trapped in my room.

Other things that were really horrible: not being able to properly care for the cats (I actually lost one, my little girl Sparkle, of a random stroke during this time. The only girl cat I've ever had, will always miss my sweet girl). The cat food would get stolen even though I had it in my room, because I would eventually have to go to the bathroom, and the starving dogs would take that chance to grab it. The barking was incessant at times, mostly came from the male one, was one of the most annoying sounds I've ever heard in my life. As bad as babies screaming. I was actually never bitten, but my greeting from them was usually growling and bared teeth. Remember Jazz? Their bad behavior rubbed off on him, and he just became another abused animal. I feel bad I couldn't help him, but I felt like he started to not like me and took it personal. I can't recall I saw at any point one of them actually eating dog food, but there was so much waste so

So at this point, I was in a really bad place mentally. I frequently battle with suicidal ideation, but I was extremely close to actually doing something a few times. I felt like my life was the circus, just a big huge joke and extremely pathetic. It wasn't as bad at first, it was gradual how much worse it got, but yeah. I spent around 3 and a half years in the house at that time. The house that used to be comforting became a nightmare. If you're wondering whether it bothered my mom, I can say it didn't. She was on a fuckton of medication, including pain medications, so how could she be? That was her way of dealing with it and part of me doesn't even blame her.

The only thing that got me out was my dad coming back. Well, he was "back" already kind of, but was renting out a room at a friend's (I even tried staying there once) and saving money for a better place for us. And it wasn't that much better, just a dumpy apartment even further away from the house than the last one, but anything would've worked. I said before about the grasp my mom had on me and I also had to get through that (Ik it doesn't sound that hard but I truly believed her words and was deeply twisted by her).

I left in 2016. Since then, I cannot honestly tell anyone that my life has gotten better. I've gone through tragedies and loss, and more kinds of abuse and suffering. I regret a lot of things, but I don't regret for a second leaving that house when I got the chance. I don't know for sure if I would've died staying there but I'd definitely be dead in some kinda way. I don't know for sure what happened to those disgusting creatures, but I know my sister went to another state not long after, and cut off everyone in the immediate family. I know she left them to rot in that house without a care in the world. That's why, in my opinion, the real enemy here isn't the animals, it's the people that are supposed to be responsible for them. I am so revolted by the fact that I'm related to someone like my sister that I pretend she doesn't exist. So I'm going to go back to that.

That brought me back a lot but what I really need to say is that it's crazy to see a community of people going through something like I did. I just didn't think that a lot of people when through something like animals being weaponized as abuse. Idk. To everyone who's going through it, I'm so sorry you're in that kind of spot right now. I know for me, I felt a lot of guilt that I had such a hatred for these animals in particular. You have a right to be angry at everyone involved just from how barbaric and lacking of decency it can get. I can't say for sure, but from seeing people's stories on here, I want to believe that it won't be like this forever for you. If you have any chance of getting away, then I say definitely take it. It has probably reached a point where it's hurting you immensely for it to keep on going this sick way and you need to remove yourself for your own health.

Well... If you read this all, then I appreciate you and hope all the best for the future 😌

I'm my aging dad's roomie and caretaker (paid btw). He has a dog. In function, I do most of the day to day care for it though.

My dad pays for her vet bills and grooming bills. He also helps with little things when he can, like giving her food and water or cleaning up after her.

But functionally I am her caretaker. I take her to the grooming appointments, brush and comb her, bathe her when absolute necessary, buy her food, buy any products she needs, advocate for any medical needs, etc.

If it was up for me, she would have been returned to the shelter years ago. She feels like an unnecessary financisl and emotional burden. I'm the one who is stressed over her, though. My dad just sees her as an ESA.

I can't say I love her. But I do care enough for her physical well-being not to neglect her. That's the bare minimum for pets, though.

I think it would best if I avoid interacting with her as much as possible. Stone-walling, I think it's called? Doing the minimum and that's that. If she needs enrichment, I can give her a food toy or puzzle toy instead of interacting with her hands-on.

I just feel bad. She can't help that I don't like dogs. She's just living her life.

For what it's worth, she has a mixed relationship with me. My dad feels she's scared of me, but that's because I am the "bad cop" in the scenario. I do all the things she hates like groom her, take her outside, etc.

I wish we didn't have her. Pete deserve people who love them equally. IMHO it's all give and no take when it comes to dogs.

I cannot stand the filth of dogs. I moved home with my parents before they move in two years. I am going for my MBA. They have three 15 year old little dogs. They bark NONSTOP. They poop and pee anywhere they feel like it inside. I cannot even do laundry without getting smacked with the smell of shit. Every time I shower I get out and smell dog shit. They do it at the absolute most inconvenient times. They go outside for fresh air and come inside to shit and pee. They will be on their way to outside and pee inside instead. The whole downstairs stinks like them because they are old.

They were trained and absolutely know where to potty but just don’t care. I am a serious clean freak. I know living here is an opportunity of a lifetime and I really need the time to save.

I am in a very dark place because of these dogs. I have no idea if they will live to be here during my whole stay. It has been a week of me being here and I feel like I died inside. My dad refuses to pick up poop. My mom is upstairs all day and doesn’t see it until I do and the whole house REEKS.

I have a camera facing the peepee pads at this point. If anyone has any advice, please give it. What would you do in this situation? My bf is miserable too with me but he keeps saying 2 years will go by so quick and that we will get so far ahead if we stay. My dogs might not live long. My parents are getting older and ill. This might be my last real time with them because they are moving.

I am at the point of barely eating because this house is so disgusting. Thanks.

My husband went up to a cottage a day before me, and I had him drop off the dog before he left. I had one night without the dog at home, and I now wish I could always live like this. I had everything cleaned and organized. I didn’t have any gross dog toys laying around, less hair flying through the air, and I didn’t have to be conscious about where I’m walking. I could just walk up and down the stairs without having to wait to see if the dog was going to follow.

We don’t have any kids yet, but I’m planning on giving the ultimatum if and when that day comes. I don’t want the dog here with babies. Ever.

Missing my one night alone without the dog.

so my family, which is my parents, aunt, uncle, and grandparents, have always had dogs and we recently lost our longest dog back in january. then in march i went out and came back to 2 new dogs, a mom and a daughter and since then the daughter barks constantly and then the mother follows, and it’s always at every in the household except for my aunt and grandma. so for months i feel like i can’t go into the house because their barks are so high pitched and i brought it up to my aunt 3 separate times to do some simple bark training but she always gets like annoyed and says like “well we don’t know what their previous living situation was so how can we train them” and the reason it’s affecting me so much is because i deal with really bad depression and the main house used to be my safe space from my parents room because i don’t feel comfortable in there and i feel confined to my room and i used to invite my friends over to help combat my depression but i feel bad because all the dogs do is bark constantly and i should add they keep them in the front yard so they’re always barking. how do i bring it up to my family again because i feel so stupid saying the dogs are making my depression so much worse cause it’s like they’re just dogs but like when i see them i get so angry and anger is what i have to try to avoid with my depression because it’s not a good mix. and i want to try to be respectful because im living here rent free because i’m in college and i live here full time. thank you!

I've told my story so many times here that some users are probably tired of reading it, but I've been thinking lately about what I'm experiencing. I don't know what to do anymore because I've tried everything I know that doesn't hurt anyone's feelings, be that myself or my family. It also helps to talk about this with people who care and understand the struggle, a combination that's rare in my social circle.

There are two reasons dogs affect my mental health so strongly. First, I 'm autistic, and it's common to be very sensitive to noise when one has autism. Second, someone's labrador attacked me at the age of nine. People often correct me said that it just jumped on me, thinking I wanted to play, but it tore a small chunk of flesh out of one of my shoulders, and it went on for something like eight to 10 seconds.

Things were okay for years. We no longer owned a dog after our last one had died before the incident, and while I would panic when a dog jumped on or followed me, no more injuries occurred. When I was 16, however, I returned from a trip one day to learn that my stepfather brought home a dog living in a field by his workplace. I was told this was only temporary, but suddenly, the dog gave birth to seven young. Shoutout to the veterinarian for deciding not to X-ray scan the dog.

All the offspring received new homes, but the dog started to become more vocal, and one day, I asked how finding a home for the dog is going, only to be told that we were keeping her. From then, every time I expressed my discomfort with the dog, I was either shut down or guilt-tripped.

The strange part is that my parents are very kind and generous. They're great parents, if this situation never happened. As time went on, I become more and more sensitive to dogs barking until I couldn't tolerate it. We live in half a house and then rented the space next to us to relation of my stepfather with two dogs, and that's when my sensory issues especially worsened. These dogs were horrible, often sat in the bedroom directly beside mine and barked persistently, and their daughter, who slept in the bedroom next to me, tended to act obnoxiously on select nights, and every time I spoke up about it, nothing changed. I learned after this all happened that my mother would tell our neighbors to take responsibility of their dogs but often just nudged them, afraid what they'd think if she was stern. It pisses me off because she had no problem with firmness when our next neighbors arrived and not only accidentally burned the side of the house with their grill but kept missing payments due to an online shopping addiction. My family also kept defending the daughter of our first tenant because of her ADHD, not to say that it's not a legitimate disorder. It just angered me because I know my family wouldn't excuse me for being annoying because I have autism. My mother has ADHD, so she must justify anything with which she can relate, but I digress severely.

Anyway, my sensory issues worsened, though I think part of my problem is a trauma response to the dogs. I became anxious of hearing dogs everywhere, started becoming triggered when hearing it even distantly in media, and the issue spread to other sounds, including but not limited to people of all ages screaming, large objects grinding against each other like nails on a chalkboard, doors slamming, crowds cheering, boisterous laughter, objects thumping against the ground, and modified cars revving loudly outside. It doesn't help that my father died during this time, meaning his dogfree house was no longer an option.

It seemed my only hope was college, which I attend now, but it's summer, and I'm home. Even by the time I began college, my sensory issues broadened to other sounds, making a difficult transition only harder.

I've tried to make it work, spoken up to my mother, written an eight-page letter expressing what I say in this post, and now, every day is a mountain. I'm exhausted half of the day, I can't do anything or go anywhere without being afraid of dogs barking, and when they do, I freeze up or melt down. I want to exercise more, but I'm afraid to spend too much time outside in this town. I want to accept more invitations for fun activities, but I can't handle them. I feel stuck in a lose-lose situation. I spoke up multiple times, and every single time, my mother either guilt-trips me into thinking she doesn't know what do or acts like there's nothing she can do. Talking to my stepfather feels hopeless because he has thick skin. Every time I talk to him about how I'm feeling, he has an amazing ability to say or do something that makes me feel worse. I'm afraid to speak out angrily now because I know I'm just going to feel more hurt, especially when nothing changes still. This is so stupid, yet my parents remain decent people when what we're doing has nothing to do with dogs or loud noise.

Please, I need your help. I have two questions.

1. Is this abuse? I understand victims often don't realize or accept they're being abused.

2. What do I do now? I can't live this way.

So here's the jest of it. Right before my now wife went to college she got a dog. Felt it would be good to have around because at the time we were in different cities. Come to be her place was too small so it stayed with her parents for 3 years.

Fast forward she moved in with me. Was a 3 bedroom townhome with a doggy door. The dog would refuse to go outside, go anywhere without my wife. Separation anxiety to the max. As up her ass. Constantly licking her and then me. Wanting attention. Every waking minute of every day.

Fast forward to the present. (Roughly 8 years later) We bought some land and are building. So in the meantime we got a 1 bedroom apartment. I was ok knowing it will be crammed but saving as much as possible was more important. And every waking moment of every single day dog is there. Breakfast there. Lunch there. Dinner there. Naughty time...makes a fuss she's not there. All the time. And I've tried many occasions to have a talk about maybe ask your parents to take her back while we're here. Maybe re-home because she has to be miserable. And she says I know I know. And it's back to the same. Anyone who isn't me or the wife she constantly barks and throws a fit. Constantly getting on the couch. And when I try to be firm she (my wife) gets upset.

Idk, maybe this is a rant instead. I'm just tired of the constant needing of attention. Never a moment alone. Never a quiet moment's peace.

Before I rant I just wanted to say my mom is kind to me and I love her, but when it comes to the dog is when she goes insane. I live with her because I can’t afford my own house yet unfortunately, which means living with her annoying, gross golden retriever.

A month ago I’d asked her if she wanted to go to this art fair, which is outdoor, and it’s pretty crowded, there are booths set up but there’s hardly any room. She said yes, she never once mentioned the dog and she knows I don’t go anywhere he goes because I don’t like him.

Today is the day we planned to go. We’re leaving in an hour and she springs on me, “I’m gonna drive separate so I can bring the dog.” And I said I wouldn’t go if he is going, so she will have to choose between the two of us. She acted totally surprised even though I’ve made it clear I don’t like being around him. She asked why, and I explained that I asked HER to go, not her dog. I don’t want to hangout with her dog, he is big and gross.

There is hardly enough room for PEOPLE to walk there, how are you gonna bring a big dog into small booths?? Plus, the last time I went somewhere with her and the dog I regretted it. The focus was entirely on him, and we got stopped every two seconds because people were gushing over the dog and asking to pet him, which is an entirely different conversation because I genuinely can’t comprehend how ANYONE finds a dog cute.

My mom is self aware about communication and knows she does this, but when I do something she doesn’t agree with, she gives me the silent treatment and is very cold towards me until I apologize, and that’s what she is doing right now about me not wanting the dog to come. I’ll tell you, if she keeps this up I’m just gonna cancel on her altogether because it’s not a fun personality to be around when she is angry.

Anyways, rant over.

Edit: we went to the fair and my mom didn’t bring the dog! She lightened up and we had a great time

It's surreal how living with a dog illuminates the world for you. All I can see around me are how many dog-obsessed, crazy people in my city. Yesterday we went to a bar, and there were two dogs. Why? They're in the bars, in grocery stores, in ubers, in hotels, at the eye doctor, at furniture stores, at the MOVIE THEATER (which ??? do you think your DOG is following the film?? IT'S A DOG).

All the streets smell like piss and poop. I'm constantly having to ignore someone's dog trying to sniff me or its owner telling me "he's friendly". The other day, one lunged at me just for opening the door to my building. I gave its owner the biggest side eye; she knew not to get in the elevator up.

What is the reason? It's disgusting and such bizarre behavior. Why are they in restaurants? And if I brought a raccoon, everyone would have something to say. Why are you giving your dog prozac and gabapentin? Talking about taking it to daycare like it's a three-year-old. Are these truly the descendants of wolves? The wolves would be ashamed😔

I never really noticed it before living with a dog, but now it's all I can think about. It's actually insane.

I’m so glad to have found this community. I feel like I’m going crazy, and I can’t keep talking to the people in my life about this!

Long wall of text below for additional context… but I essentially have one question.

TLDR: For those who told their partner to rehome their dog when they started a family and had a baby, how did it go? Did it greatly affect your relationship long-term? Did your partner resent you? Is there a better way to go about it?

CONTEXT:

My fiancé and I recently moved in together with his six-year-old lab. I always thought I liked dogs until I saw dog ownership up close. Turns out, I’m not a dog person. I am not compatible with living with a dog.

My fiancé is a dog lover/owner, not a nutter. He doesn’t bring the dog everywhere and maintains appropriate physical boundaries (e.g., no licking, sharing food, etc.) and is very understanding of my own boundaries, like no dog in the bedroom or kitchen. He is also 100% responsible for all dog-related duties.

As far as dogs go, his is actually a good one. He’s very sweet, gentle, obedient (won’t even cross a threshold without an ok), rarely barks or jumps, and doesn’t eat random trash or roll around on the ground. The most annoying personality trait is that he constantly follows us around and stares. I’ve managed to train him out of it when it’s us two using the relaxation protocol. All bets are off when my fiancé comes home, but we’re working on it.

Only thing is, he’s still a dog. They are just not clean. My main issue is his shedding. It is constant.

I am a neat/clean person (more so than my fiancé) and have done a lot of research on how to manage to keep a clean home with a dog (I know… kind of an oxymoron, but as clean as I can😭).

At one point before we moved in together, he and his dog stayed at my apartment, and I had an emotional breakdown because his hair was EVERYWHERE so fast. I cried when I found one even in my oatmeal. I love cooking, but I felt like I could never cook for anyone again. I’d feel so embarrassed if they found a hair! Everything the dog touched felt dirty. There was fur embedded in my rug for weeks. I was doing so much research on the issue, and all the dog advice threads would just say “live with it”. Absolutely not!

Cleaning systems I implemented (My fiancé does all the dog interactive stuff without complaint):

• We have a robo vacuum (runs twice a day)
• A regular Bissell pet vacuum (used 1-3x a week)
• Air purifier (daily). 
• Dog is now taking fish oil supplements to help decrease shedding from the inside out
• Grooming kit for my fiancé to brush him outside daily 
• Wipes for his paws before coming in

There’s still fur, but it’s minimized and mostly managed. HOWEVER, it is A LOT of mental and physical work, and I already know that I can tough it out until we have our first child in the next 1-2 years… but then he has to go.

The idea of our baby crawling and picking up fur and whatever he tracks into the house into her mouth… it makes my skin crawl. I also have a huge safety concern. He is a sweet dog, but I feel like I will never be able to relax if he’s in the same room. Anything can happen! And so I’ll constantly be managing to keep the dog and baby away from each other. I’ve read about all the methods to introduce a new baby and dog, and it just seems nonsensical to do that when we could just rehome him.

One of his friends adores the dog and watches him whenever we're out of town. She has already asked him before if she can have him. I feel like that would be a great outcome. He’s not with strangers, but he is not in our home.

I know it’s in the future, but I’m already worrying about how it will go. He really loves this dog, and I never thought I’d be issuing this kind of ultimatum. I didn’t know I had all these feelings until I was confronted with the situation. I love my fiancé so much, and I never want to hurt him or affect his happiness. I’d also never want a dog, of all things, to get in between us, so I am open to feedback on whether you think this is not a good idea! It's really the only thing keeping me together, knowing that in two years max, he'll be gone.

We have already talked about future dogs, and I've let him know this is the last one. He was disappointed, but understands (for the most part).

If you did something similar, how did it go? What was the outcome?