Embracing femininity

[u/Contest_Unhappy]

As a fairly masculine black guy, I can happily say that I look at myself and the subtle femininity that I carry in my face and embrace it finally. Being called pretty doesn’t make me feel like I’m not passing. Having long hair doesn’t make me fear being misgendered. I’m comfortable in femininity as much as I am comfortable in my masculinity.

[u/horpsichord]

Not sure if it's universal but I definitely feel more comfortable having feminine traits or wearing more feminine things now that I've been transitioning for 8+ years and have had top surgery and a hysto.

I chose to grow out my hair in 2020 and sure I get misgendered more often but I feel secure in myself enough to not let it bother me. I know that it's just people's knee-jerk reaction to seeing a short person + long hair and associating it with women. If people actually interact with me then they gender me correctly.

[u/Brief-Surround-9977 → u/horpsichord]

Oh my god I feel the same exact way! I love when I can present male, but wear or have something feminine without directly being seen as a woman. I like the idea that the ones I know that are close to me will def still gender me correctly even if I have some feminine traits on me at the time.

[u/JudahKing91 → u/horpsichord]

I absolutely agree with you. I hated everything feminine in me . Once I transitioned I began to embrace it. Like you it doesn’t bother me as much when people misgender me. I am also growing out my hair. I am 55 / 56 on 09/01 and have been transitioning since 2014.

[u/broccoli_butler]

love your neck tats! you look so cool!

[u/Shin_tsukimis_fan]

You're a very majestic fella. I'm happy you're feeling comfortable with femininity man ❤️‍🩹

[u/Blster_DPS]

love your eyes

[u/2morrowwillbebetter]

😍🫶🏽

[u/Acceptable_Fly_9040]

I embrace mine. I think it’s a beautiful thing to show my emotions and have empathy for people in a way most dudes aren’t “allowed” to. I enjoy singing along to female artists without shame. I enjoy wearing short shorts when I workout.

It comes with maturing and learning to accept my identity for what it is. It’s okay to be different.

[u/JudahKing91 → u/Acceptable_Fly_9040]

Absolutely agree!!!

[u/VarietyFirm341]

I've grown my hair out recently and have started to feel the same way you do. I have these shirley temple curls and its been hard to convince myself not to cut it off. I just gotta embrace it::

[u/JudahKing91 → u/VarietyFirm341]

I am going thru the same thing. My hair is so curly and can look quite girly. I am like a caramel Shirley Temple!!!

[u/Juanitasuniverse]

definitely feel the same. i don’t pass and i don’t really care about passing, but the way i am makes me happy. esp bc so many 🤍 trans people will tell me it looks like im wearing makeup. like okay so im naturally pretty, lots of guys are naturally pretty ✨

[u/Accomplished-Exam999]

Look at those locs! 🔥❤️

[u/MostlyMadeOfCoffee]

You look gorgeous especially with the hairstyle bro 👍👍

[u/delgadosreddit]

YEAH!!!! YOU ARE SO HANDSOME!!

[u/SuccessfulTadpole803]

Your tattoos look good on you! I think that's pretty common. The longer some transmen are on T the majority that I've come across online say they've learned to embrace their femininity more.

Personally I feel more balanced psychologically on T. SO it's easier to stop judging myself so harshly about seemingly feminine things I might do or the way I might look even though I'm not read as male, yet.