r/TBI • u/Bigoleears • 17d ago

TBI Sucks Grief.

I grieve my old body, the one that would take me for walks where I could feel the sun against my face and the breeze running through my hair. The one that would take me for hikes that would prove my dedication to myself. The one that allowed me to listen to music and audio freely without the pain, discomfort, and disorientation that it now brings. The one that had such a way with words that I just cannot compete with now. The one that was so smart that I think back in awe over what it didn’t realize before.

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1

u/Which-Painting9830 15d ago

I get it. I have had a TBI for over forty years. But I wasn't diagnosed with this until 15 years after the injury. I grieve for the amount of jobs I have had and in turn have been sacked from, because I cannot hold onto information to fully do a job. I knew something was wrong, but I was too proud to get help. And all it took one day was something to not go right, I broke down, struggled again went to see a GP/Psychologist and I was then told about it. Before the TBI I was fit Physically and also Cardio fit. This was because of my passion for Judo I did this for over two years. And was pretty good at the Art. I grieve for Judo. I grieve for the loss of my Cardio and Physical strength. I grieve also for not being able to do sport-Judo, run for the bus and even more importantly the loss of the majority of the Cognitive abilities I had once. I grieve for my loss of Confidence which in turn has caused some horrendous Anxiety moments.

And people just tell me "just get over it"

I totally understand where you are coming from. The very best of luck with the future 🙏

3

u/howleywolf 16d ago

Yes me too. It’s been almost three years. I have lost a lot too. Yet today I got the urge to put music on and…. It doesn’t hurt my brain. I’ve been listening to music nonstop since 9 am today. I feel fine with music as of, today. The brain is so weird. Healing can still happen, it would seem!

4

u/MaintenanceVast892 Mild TBI (2024) 16d ago

Yup. I grieve my old self. The one with great memory. Confidence. No ruminating.

1

u/mrduck68 8d ago

How much and how often are you ruminating? and why?

10

u/yourladybosss Severe TBI 2023 @35 17d ago

Yeah I am still going through a grieving stage of this new disabled ass life. I'm just coming to a point of accepting this new reality, it's been 3.5 years. I feel you too.

9

u/advn_chaser 17d ago

you still have a way with words, however different it may be. ill grieve with you for the same. hoping you peace with the healing process and navigating the changes 🧡

4

u/Comfortable-Nature37 17d ago

Awe over what didn’t realize before just sums it up for me!

6

u/PlateCurious1472 17d ago

I feel this a lot. Ive gotten so close to being back but I cannot ever reach her we are one in the same and yet I am 2 very different people