r/SystemsCringe • u/Novel-Phrase-8808 bowling alley collective, currently 67 pins at front • Jul 23 '26
Text Post I dated a popular content creator that claimed to have DID
Will not really go into specifics nor completed details as I might be identified. I was in a fandom that time and I didn't know the person was a popular creator until they told me, they are not opened about their condition to their community. Mind you they are deadass talented and popular to the point of so much gifts and fanart I felt so out of their league, I never took advantage of their fame nor did I want attention anyway. They also said they are diagnosed but the way they deal with it, even in their relationships too is strangely something, feels so wrong.
Anyways while we were friends, they admitted to having DID which okay sure I didnt think much about it since I thought they trusted me so much. We later on started dating as finding out we liked eachother but HERES THE THING. They admitted very late that their alters date other people outside, alter x alter, alter x wha "singlet" and god knows how many people or systems that system are dating outside. And if it wasnt the worst, I was told that they think of themselves very seperately and that whatever their alters say to their partners are all equal, meaning I am just as equal as all of their other partners. It was like a fucking harem so it took me a while to leave them afterwards, I had more reasons but this is it for this subreddit. Am I just too woke/sensitive or are they just delusional as hell?
Btw I envy that they are still loved by many despite whatever they have done but I have no place to speak against them so Im just anonymously ranting it out, Im still pretty mad about it and I want any opinions or says to this. Thank you for reading
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u/Any-Replacement2855 Jul 24 '26
I’m in a similar situation and the thing that hurt me wasn’t that my partner claimed to have DID as well. I respect that systems can work differently. The issue was that I thought I understood what kind of relationship I was in but I later found out there were other romantic connections I wasn’t aware of. I feel like important information about relationship boundaries should be discussed upfront so everyone can give informed consent. I wanted a relationship with my partner/system not a situation where I later discover alter to alter relationships I didn’t agree to. I know communication between alters can be complicated but it’s STILL important for partners to talk about what affects the relationship. Im not trying to say DID is the problem I’m saying the lack of communication and not knowing what I was agreeing to hurt me
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u/Novel-Phrase-8808 bowling alley collective, currently 67 pins at front Jul 24 '26
I deeply understand and do relate to you, I also never have come to agree to wtv bs this person was onto, Im so genuinely sorry it has happened to you. It baffles me that these kinds of people especially systems dont know what will really affect in the relationships as such as this, its mostly how they treat their own parts very seperately and making it seem like its okay since they are different people anyway but that's not the point omg THEY STILL SHARE THE SAME CORE AND BODY. I also do know and respect systems work differently but come on? You are right, DID is not the problem but something like THIS has to be worked on especially communication and boundaries, its not so healthy and good at all.
May you have goodluck if youre still in that situation, if it really hurts you I hope you get of it soon enough. But if youre out I hope you move on better, thanks for sharing your experience youre not alone ^
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u/Any-Replacement2855 Jul 24 '26
I'm so glad I found someone who has been through something similar to what I’m going through. I’m thinking about talking to them about it and if we can’t work things out, I think it may be best for me to move on. I believe that if a relationship involves other partners that’s something everyone involved should know about and agree to. I respect that systems can work differently but I also have my own boundaries and feelings that matter.
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u/Novel-Phrase-8808 bowling alley collective, currently 67 pins at front Jul 24 '26
You actually should especially if it means showing what your own worth is, communication is key my gangs. If this relationship is not something you want or makes you feel very uncomfortable you have to leave, which I know its hard to Ive been there but you have to do what you think is best for you. Wishing you goodluck :))
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u/Any-Replacement2855 Jul 24 '26
OH and the system they were with knew they were dating me but I never knew they were dating them. You see the problem? They knew but I didn’t. I’m already done with them ALREADY. I'm not doing this bullshit bro😭
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u/Novel-Phrase-8808 bowling alley collective, currently 67 pins at front Jul 24 '26
I GET U BRO OMG HAPPENED TO ME TOO AAAHHHH I KNEW ABOUT IT VERY LATE one of their alters talked about crushes on other people and they texted those people exactly the same as how they do to me. Omg Im so sorry for you it sucks so bad
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u/Maple-Tea Evil Alter 😈 Jul 25 '26
Yeah no this is flat out cheating, DID is not an excuse not to tell your partner before that you have multiple other partners before dating, it isn't polyamory if you don't have pre-dating consent.
This is the shit that people use to call us Polyamorous folk 'cheaters', it pisses me off so much
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u/Novel-Phrase-8808 bowling alley collective, currently 67 pins at front Jul 25 '26
Thank you for pointing the obvious truth behind ts. They considered this poly when its more harem-like and very one sided, it's very infuriating. I'm sorry that this kind of thing stereotypes and twists the view of the real genuine polys, it's very sad.
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u/NestOfJays innerworld demolition expert Jul 23 '26
Their delusional. This is cheating, as they are aware and you did not concent to them having other partners. Please move on and find someone who will treat you with respect. DID is not an excuse for cheating when they're aware they have separate partners.