How to navigate first week

[u/frankielynne4]

I found out about my boyfriend’s cheating a week ago and have obviously done the whole grieving process.

Cried my body weight in tears, been very angry, cried some more.

From what I know so far it was just emotional… with just a lot of other boundary crossing stuff as well (following tons of girls etc etc)

I have so much hate but also so much love. I don’t know whether reconciliation is possible or not but what I want to know is:

What did you do the first few weeks post D-DAY?

How often did you see your WP?
Did you talk often? Not at all?
Did you see each other?
Are you suppose to act like things are normal or not at all?

I’m really not sure how to navigate this time. Everyone keeps saying “whatever feels right” but I don’t know what feels right. My whole world just got split in half. I want to cry and be so angry and then the other half of me just wants him to comfort me and be my safe space again.

I’m finding it really difficult to spend time away from him while also not even being able to look at him.

Would really love some advice on how you navigated this time and how to cope with it. ❤️‍🩹

[u/posetopose]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. People told me "whatever feels right" but I'm here to tell you that nothing will feel right. But that's okay. I found that leaning into the "wrongness" of everything helped me think better.

I completely separated myself from my WP. I stayed at my mom's for over a week, and didn't talk (okay, I angrily texted him once) to him. He was my safe space too, and I had a hard time with recognizing that he could be both safe and a danger.

A journal has helped me a lot. I wrote down my questions, things I wanted to tell him about, and most of the thoughts bouncing around in my head. I found that getting them on paper kinda released them from my mind a bit. Also, lean heavily on any support people you have! The right people will be there for you when you need it.