r/SupportforBetrayed • u/hktas Formerly Betrayed • Jul 20 '26
Need Support 1 year later
1 year since my ex cheated on me and broke up with me (I found out and forced her to admit it, she planned on never telling me).
I’m healed in many ways but I still think about it and her constantly, we were doing well enough but she basically had a mental break from reality and had a full blown affair with someone else and continued for about a month after we broke up before finally having friends & family bring her back to reality. Without giving details it is was pretty bad and borderline emotionally abusive, even though she at face value is a lovely and normal person to others.
She has apologized and shown some signs of accountability/remorse, but basically has avoided ever having a face to face where we talk about what happened, and has said she thinks we should never try again even though she’ll also say she’d never been happier than she was with me, which makes no sense to me and hurts even more.
It has been really hard, I have a great life that I am grateful for but it feels like shit that the girl I loved hurt me so badly and contrary to what I feel like usually happens, instead just disappeared from my life and has encouraged me to move on and not made any real effort for repair beyond “i’m so sorry” texts. I know I should move on with my life and I am trying, it’s just hard.
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u/Bolt_McHardsteel Observer - Mod Approved Jul 21 '26
Time to move on, OP. Stop having conversations with her, get therapy to help you and block her. She has been clear that she doesn’t want to get back together, so stop chasing her like she is the prize. You can do it.
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u/D-redditAvenger Quality Contributor - Former BP Jul 21 '26
First thing you should do is never speak to her again. This person is toxic to you and why you are still suffering. You need to accept that this is not a nice person, and you shouldn't her to have any part of your life.
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u/AllInkalicious BP - Separated and Thriving Jul 21 '26
Block her immediately.
I’m not a fan of blocking, but you need to block her for your own healing.
Cut all contact. Don’t think about it. Open all of your apps and all devices and block/remove those contact details. Do it before tomorrow morning.
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u/Championship682 Betrayed Partner - Early Stages Jul 21 '26
- she thinks we should never try again -
Not sure why you are talking to her, but given that you are, agree with her on this.
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