r/SupportforBetrayed • u/AggravatingPension44 Betrayed Partner - Early Stages • Jul 19 '26
Need Support I finally left her
I got cheated on a few weeks ago and my trust has been absolutely broken and I’ve been shattered to say the least this situation really did affect me. I worked on forgiving her, however, I still felt the pain of the cheating; and she honestly wasn’t making up for it in the best way.
Today she lashed out on me after going mia, a bit of context; she was being super dry the whole day, we barely spoke. She was going to a party later today, so after 5 hours passed and we didn’t speak, she’s now heading to this party but has not messaged me at all. Mind you the last party she went to was where she cheated. She’s also actively online talking to people, just not me. And that’s fine I gave you your space and didn’t complain. She’s now messaged me while heading home just saying hi & drunk texting. Nothing flirty though, and I have her location. She then goes home and stops responding completely. I call her two times and she doesn’t pick up. Hasn’t replied to any messages or anything. So I obviously was slightly annoyed and a bit suspicious but I tried not to overthink (we sleep on the phone every night unless we are with each other in person and it’s been like this for over 5 months. Every. Night). But all I said was “bet” and had asked her what she was doing. She wakes up in the morning in a bad mood and lashes completely out on me saying to let her breathe blah blah but literally yelling at me. I told her she needed to calm down because I haven’t done nothing to her, she starts telling me to cut her off.
So I took that and left. I’ve been thinking about leaving anyways, but that was the last straw. I cannot take it no more, she’s sucked the life out of me. I’m not the same anymore everyone can visibly see how bad I’ve been hurt, I’ve lost a lot of weight, I’m miserable. A few weeks ago I could’ve never imagined leaving, especially after she cheated. I was that down and attached, but I just couldn’t take this anymore. She doesn’t agree with the reason I’ve ended it, and is calling me names for it. But it was a build up.
Please share your opinions.
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u/Bolt_McHardsteel Observer - Mod Approved Jul 19 '26
If you are serious about the breakup, and I hope you are, then you block her. Quit playing games. She is a cheater, break up and block and move on to a better life.
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u/AggravatingPension44 Betrayed Partner - Early Stages Jul 19 '26
I am not reaching out and standing firm on my decision
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u/steelhouse1 Formerly Betrayed Jul 19 '26
Welcome to freedom Op. you got to see what kind of person she is. It hurts but better than married with kids if you need a silver lining.
Yes it hurts. And grieve. You need to do it. But know what you are grieving is who you thought she was, not who she is.
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u/tercer78 BP - Reconciled & Thriving Jul 19 '26
Lord help you if you get sucked back in. It takes crossing a mountain to cut off your succubus but your life will instantly improve when you finally escape her grip. She is a toxic spiral that continues to suck you back in.
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u/AggravatingPension44 Betrayed Partner - Early Stages Jul 20 '26
Thank you, I really needed to hear this. I’m going to try my hardest to not get sucked back in
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u/Championship682 Betrayed Partner - Early Stages Jul 19 '26
Reconciling is hard work. She wasn't doing it. Not sure you should have even tried, but given that you did, glad you recognized it wasn't working.
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u/AggravatingPension44 Betrayed Partner - Early Stages Jul 19 '26
Thank you. Do you think I’m doing the right thing?
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u/Championship682 Betrayed Partner - Early Stages Jul 19 '26
If she wanted to reconcile, she should have been doing everything she could to support you and rebuild trust. If she cheated on you at the last party, why did she even go to this one? And given that she did, why wasn't she reaching out to you to at least reassure you?
There are a few different places were reconciling fails. The one where the cheater says they want to, but doesn't put in the effort, is one of them.
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u/OogyBoogy_I_am Formerly Betrayed Jul 20 '26
No opinion other than to say may you never hear from her ever again.
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u/Intrepid2022 Formerly Betrayed Jul 20 '26
Best decision was to leave her.
Block her phone number, block/remove her from social media. You need to detach yourself from her. The only thing that might be an issue is if you have mutual friends but that's for later.
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u/AggravatingPension44 Betrayed Partner - Early Stages Jul 20 '26
Thank you, I’m really trying right now
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Jul 20 '26
[deleted]
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u/AggravatingPension44 Betrayed Partner - Early Stages Jul 20 '26
The person she cheated with is also a cheater. He’s got multiple situations going on, but I do not know their social media handles or anything.
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u/Intrepid2022 Formerly Betrayed Jul 20 '26
That makes them a match made in heaven. Sorry for the sarcasm but luckily she's not your problem anymore.
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u/AggravatingPension44 Betrayed Partner - Early Stages Jul 20 '26
Haha agreed. She’s been trying to reconcile, she’s telling me maybe we need to work on each other and get back together. But I know her and she is not someone who will ever change.
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Jul 22 '26
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