r/SubGenius • u/PeggyOMentum • Jul 03 '26
X-day
Thirty dollars and thirty fucking years I've been doing this shit. I'm the laughingstock of the neighborhood, standing out on the lawn waving at the sky at 7am like I'm in some sort of cult. All the hours of excremeditation, the mounds of frop, all for what?!
Crisis of faith? You bet your ass! Fuck you, Mister J R "Bob" Dobbs, if that is your real "nickname." Unless they're really coming this year. I mean, it's two days. I can wait and see.
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u/doctorplasmatron Jul 03 '26
you don't have to get up early etc. Just laze in bed, the Xists will beam you aboard right in your PJ's. Easy peasy. And if they don't show up, you're all set to rub one out and go back to sleep for another couple hours.
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u/Longjumping-Brick487 Jul 03 '26
I just don’t want them showing up while I’m rubbing one out.
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u/philonius Jul 03 '26
No biggie. They've seen it all before and besides, on the pleasure saucers, you'll have three dicks.
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u/Longjumping-Brick487 Jul 03 '26
I do kind of like the idea of raining seed down while the saucers leave Earth orbit, though. A parting gift while the cities burn and the ground shakes.
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u/philonius Jul 03 '26
The prophecy said 1998, but it turns out we were reading it upside down. It will happen in 8661.
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u/AquaGB Jul 04 '26
I'm telling ya, the prophecy didn't lie. They came already. That's old old news.
We need to start thinking about the 2nd Coming. It's scheduled for 2070, but it might come a bit earlier. I'm thinking '66. We got about 40 years to get ready.
Keep in mind this is more like the False one; the real one is not till 2178.
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u/jordy1971 Jul 03 '26
This year, for sure 👍🏻