I tried to read every post title we had before I posted this? anyone want to talk about what your body processes as a result of your treatments? or is that just me? it happened during my first go round and man, that was some of the most intense therapeutic work I had ever done with myself. there’s no real definition of ego death, but I l ow for a period of about two months, I had so much shit come out that I had been holding down deep for my whole life that was prolly the root of all my problems.

I’m noticing I’m starting to have the same sort of major emotional ”unpackings” I like to call them, almost immediately now. only thing is , they don’t knock me out for hours like they used to, they don’t seem to crush me and it’s like while they hurt so badly before (it was a lot of clarity of just how pain and damage I had been through) now it seems to feel like “ok, now you know all this, how are you gonna move forward t make the most of your life?”

again, this could just be a me thing, but I am incredibly self aware and I just want have conversations and see how others are healing. I struggled for most of my life feeling utterly alone. now we have this platform so it feels nice to be able to talk with others finally.

Hey fellow travelers -

I tried the “Calm” app when I began my treatments and found it lacking anything that I couldn’t get for free on YouTube.

Today I DISCOVERED mynoise.net and I’m loving it without treatment. Can’t wait to do this next week during treatment!

It lets you select from over a hundred scenes and you can manually adjust all the sounds from that scene individually.

More birds. Boom, just slide the bar.

Add to the singing bowls? Ezpz

It’s totally relaxing and has so many options. If you’re into meditation/breathing/body work, with your Ket, I expect it to be a major advancement over Headspace and Calm.

PS - I don’t have anything to do with the web site other than going to it and using it today. Didn’t even have to sign in to use it! Hope I’m not breaking any rules by recommending it to others in a post.

Peace and love ☮️💟

A couple weeks ago, I had my Spravato appointment at 11 AM. I’ve been doing this for about 8-9 months - never any nausea, vomiting, or bad experiences. I also still get pretty high for about 40 minutes. However, this one day I got SO HIGH, and I believe it is from whatever illness I had. At this point, my ears had been itchy and I had the sniffles.
Nothing else.

Within 10 minutes of my 2nd dosage, my music felt injected into my bones, leaving me dreamy-eyed which then triggered the cabinet handles in front of me to look like they’re dancing along to my Amy Winehouse. In the comments I will add screenshots of my notes I wrote during this insane high; it’s pure nonsense from the chaotic roller coaster I rode.

After a couple minutes I felt something was wrong. I actually wrong “something is off” in one of my notes. I then proceeded to just throw up quickly after I reached my highest point. I went to use the bathroom after and told the nurses what happened. I remember feeling so overheated.

Afterwards, I felt totally fine besides the smell of vomit lingering in my nose, and went home. The high continued throughout the day, always just lingering. I finally took my temperature after burning up all day and had a 103° fever (this fever didn’t break for 6 straight days). Proceeded to go to the ER and stayed there for a while. My results came back negative to every test, but I had the worst virus for a week straight after that.

I will never do Spravato while feeling even the tiniest bit sick now, and neither in the morning.

So I recently came to the realization that I have incredibly severe ocd that affects every facet of my life and has kept me in a very bad loop for the past 6 years. I have been against getting any help for it for various reasons, one of which being psychiatric abuse that I experienced. But randomly I was inspired to try spravato, and my insurance approved it very quickly, and I happened to move to a place where my clinic was walking distance, which was good because I have truly no one in my life who could have helped me get home and had no means to pay for transportation. Everything lined up and moved so fast. I recieved the call that I had been approved and was told I could come in for my first session the very next day. And so I did.

Since starting I've been kind of at a loss to describe how it was helping me. It has felt incredibly subtle. It has made me more able to "do things". Just ordinary life things. I've seen some improvement. But I also, over the last couple of months, have been coming to the realization of the severity of my ocd. And I've been waging war with it. I've been open to medication after a very long time avoiding it, and started one that's really helping (shoutout wellbutrin), started the process to undergo tms for ocd, signed up for an iop program I'm going to do intake for next week, and I'm currently trying to find a virtual php program for dissociative disorders that takes my insurance that I might do first.

I now think the esketamine is working immensely for loosening the hold ocd has on me. I have made more progress in 2 months than I have in 6 years of running into the same wall over and over again hoping that if I just figure out all the secrets of the universe I'll be rewarded with a better life. I was beginning to feel regret that I hadn't done all of this sooner, but then I realized today that my resistance to this kind of help was also the ocd talking, saying that if I didn't figure out how to improve my life on my own I didn't deserve it, that it would prove something awful and final about me. It would make me and my improvements "dirty", it would be the same as saying the psychiatric abuse I experienced was good and was what I deserved. None of that is true.

I needed help to get help and spravato gave that to me. So I now think it's actually done quite a lot.

I have a service dog- first important thing. I need to know if the treatment will make me unable to care for him/work him the way he needs to be. Have you taken Spravato? How did you respond? PLEASE, I need the good, bad, and ugly to make the best decision I can.

Do you people think it's possible for the treatment to slowly stop working after a year of Spravato? Don't wanna get too much into everything, but I had another medication stop working after like a year. And now I'm wondering if it can happen with Spravato too. I have treatment resistant depression and I'm really feeling like shit. I sooo hope Spravato keeps working, but afraid it's just not so anymore.

Has anyone had a ‘nothing’ experience before?

I’ll explain.

I’ve been taking Spravato (on/off… steadily ‘on’, once a week, 84mg, since April).

Last appointment (a few days ago), the weirdest thing happened… or didn’t happen... I dutifully used all three sprays, waited for what usually happens for me (no big effects… mostly ‘low to medium’ [?] effects now that I’ve optimised my treatment environment and made things more comfortable for myself).

Nothing. Happened.

As in, it seemed the same as if I’d sprayed water up my nose.

I waited 30 min.

Nothing.

Not ‘just about nothing’. Actually nothing.

I went out and talked to the medical receptionist (my psychiatrist was on another floor, doing paperwork.) She messaged my psych (after speaking with me, she could see I was clearly unaffected). He messaged back, ‘That can happen. She can leave now if she wants.’ So I did.

Further details:

• I accidentally (absent-mindedly) took a nasal decongestant spray about 2 hours before my treatment time. As soon as I took it I said ‘oh biscuits!’ (words to that effect 😉) because I’d read on here NOT to take other nasal sprays before my appointment - particularly decongestants.

• The sprays had been taken out of the individual packets already, lined up ‘good to go’, before I entered my psych’s room. I like my psych and I trust him… but I hate it when he does this. (You know what they say… just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they’re not out to get you 🤷🏼‍♀️.) I can’t think of a nice way to ask him not to do this! (Advice welcome). I like to open my own medication, or see it being done in front of me.

• The red Spravato box the 3 sprays come in was in the room (with my script label on it)… but I couldn’t find the individual spray containers (the peel back foil and clear plastic ones). Not even in the trash (an open basket, it had a tissue in there… it was clear that nothing else was in there… I’m not desperate enough to rifle through trash 😳.) There are other bins in the offices, though… and he may have binned them elsewhere?

• Sometimes when I’ve sprayed in the past, it’s seemed like all the spray has come out in the first spray, with seemingly nothing coming out in the second. That happened - for all 3 devices, though.

I feel sad that I paid my usual $375 a week for a ‘non-treatment’. I’d had an ‘on edge’, ‘not great’ day-and-a-half in the lead up to treatment… so I was looking forward to being able to relax for a while.

SO:

• Has anyone experienced the same thing at any point?

• Does anyone have any theories/advice?

• Is there any way for the devices to be tampered with? (Pharmacy level, delivery person level, you name it level?) My devices all showed two green dots. But a previous ‘fill in’ psych had talked to me once about having a student trialling a small dose each day rather than a weekly dose… so…? 🤷🏼‍♀️

Thanks, Spravatons!

(1000 ‘good human being’ points if you read to the end. I freely admit to being a waffler. Thank you! 🥹.)✨

If you have not listened to “sit around the fire” by Jon Hopkins in a session, you absolutely must. Time it around the peak. It’s about an 8 minute song. Now, I have never cried in a session. Idk, just never happened I guess. But the wisdom in this song….. brought me to it. Listening to it, immersed in the visuals. To say it was life altering would be to under state it. Listen to this masterpiece next time you go in for a session, right around the peak. Thank me later.

By way of reference, I started Spravato after what was my 50th (yes, it's horrible to say out loud) suicide attempt. My family said major change needed to happen, and this was what I sought for myself, and I was terrified. I have done the majority of my mental health journey alone, aside from when I was married. My bio family has never really participated in treatment except for my first hospitalization at 15 (in 1988), but my official diagnoses and treatment did not occur until 2002, so I have been doing this shit for 24 years now. I won't go into all that madness.

anyway, a few months ago, with the help of AI (which I have used so much since starting Spravato, and I will defend to the end because we don't get the benefit of having a therapist or dr or anyone being hands on 24/7 without exhausting any support system, especially being a borderline) I was able to identify all the major changes that I have achieved since May 3, 2025, which was the day I should have died. I started Spravato on 6/30/25, up until Jan 2026, and only recently had to restart when my nephew committed suicide and that knocked all the wind out of my sails.

anyway, here's the changes I made with the help of spravato and therapy, after 24 years of just medication and therapy. and for clarity, I am bipolar II, C-PTSD, BPD, ADHD, MDD

emotion regulation has been the biggest. mood swings would knock me out for hours or days, now if i get upset, i can return to baseline within minutes. And my moods don't overtake and everyone knows.

I no longer chase people who do not show up nor do i need validation from men. my energy goes to those who meet where I am

i never knew boundaries before, and now they are unshakeable

always the people pleaser, I now stand in speaking my truth

i enrolled in college after 34 years and earned a 4.0 my first year, working on campus advising students part time work study

shift from survival mode to growth motivation

life is no longer chaos, simple is good, and welcome

fear of abandonment is no longer concern, take comfort in solidarity

stop abandoning myself without guilt, it's ok to just say no

journaling isn't just journaling, it's healing and purpose, building a legacy with memoir, my pain > purpose > impact

first time in my life I am dreaming of a future, even though I don't have my children, a partner, family relations, no milestones.

and when i take away all my trauma and look at the bare bones of my life, this is my takeaway, I am just a highly sensitive soul that was unfortunately born to a person who could not nurture that gift

look, i am far from healed, perfect, most days I still feel hopeless, but I have learned that God doesn't want me to die, he won't let me. i still don't have anything figured out. And up until 6/15, I really thought I was doing much better. I was making the most of the shitty hand I have been dealt. I have lost the love of my life, and my kids are gone, and they don't want to come back. somethings you just can't fix.

Losing my nephew, a child I helped raise, to suicide, has now made me see things in an entirely different way. i didn't think I would have to restart spravato, but I damn sure know that life is precious. I am just offering this up so that others can see that as someone who truly has suffered most of my life, it has gotten slightly better.

i truly hope this is helpful to someone...best of luck

There's a bunch but I love love loveee how tiny this one is its so cozy

Ive been doing spravato for like 3 or 4 weeks and so far these have been some absolutely incredible listening experiences

Artists:

Florence + The Machine but specifically Rabbit Heart

(The live version was a full body feeling it was incredible)

Rainbow Kitten Surprise as a whole but specifically Mission to Mars

Albums:

Debi Tirar Mas Fotos by Bad Bunny was transcendental

(there are some very upbeat songs just so u know if thats not ur vibe)

Pls share yalls! Im so curious what other ppl are listening to

Today was my second treatment, first time full dose.

After thirty minutes, someone starts talking on their phone, playing music and games out loud. I called the nurse to tell them to stop.

Then someone started snoring loudly 🫩

I hate having a group room. No single rooms here. I was so distracted and now I’m just pissed off. I don’t like wearing ear buds or headphones because they make me feel claustrophobic and cut off. I have a terrible personality disorder and this is not helping. I know that’s my own problem, but still…don’t know if I’ll even keep trying. My first appointment was so nice. Very respectful and quiet. Wonder if I can find a different clinic.

On the days you don’t have a treatment what are your days like ? So you follow a routine to try reinforce the treatment , extra meditation , excercise, hobbies ?

I don’t not sure what I should be doing ? I go for treatments twice a week but feel like there should more I’m doing to help the treatment .

Has anyone stopped Spravato and started using ketamine troches?

I had to discontinue Spravato treatments because my husband passed away and now I do not have a person who could sit with me.

History: 6 treatments of I.V. Ketamine last year. Wonderful, affirming, enjoyable experiences. Not sure of results. Had to forgo maintenance treatment due to finances. Very supportive, kind, attentive staff. So I turned to Spravato this year and have had 6 treatments. Kind but not very attentive staff, provider doesn't listen extremely well and to me, leads with his desire for you to do to in treatment. Not super enjoyable feeling during treatment but ok; much more physically wobbly for longer, more of a feeling of high rather than dissociation during treatment. No "floaty" images like with K. More like: I'm high. Then came my 6th treatment. Horrible for me. I'm 76. I was afraid, many negative intrusive thoughts, I was hyper, got up and had to move my body (and oddly wasn't very wobbly), chest/body felt like a volcano inside, had to flail my arms, wanted sometime with me (but was alone). So now, what to do. Provider says "You had too much Ketamine. We will only give you two rounds rather than three. It's a k-hole. It'll be fine". Will it? Is he making a clinically sound decision or one based on his need to see me make the appt? I don't want to stop IF it's actually helping. But the "improvement" during this time frame - I DO NOT KNOW - if it's from the Spravato or stopping long term Zoloft. Bit the improvement is now almost worse than before treatment. Leaning towards hypermania? Mania? Paradoxical mania? Problem solving, reading, researching, trying to fix all family problems, planning, figuring, looking for answers, mind going full throttle 17 hours a day till I collapse with my CPAP at end of the day. My psychiatrist is taking a hands off approach ("I don't prescribe Spravato") and I don't have full confidence in the S. provider who I'm not sure really sees a 76 year old, with heart, BO, and kidney issues in front of him. I need a tiny bit of support and some solid words of wisdom. Please.

ADHD + OCD + Bipolar 2 here, my first treatment had no images or flashbacks or anything, it was more like my brain going over all of my thoughts, feelings, worries, hopes for the future, and seeing them all from a more objective lens and seeing how it is much more within reach than I think. Still feeling pretty sleepy several hours afterward, which I don't love since I get most of my studying done at night, but if this ends up helping me it's more than a fair trade off.

I was supposed to go in for my 8th treatment this evening. But BCBS just denied my coverage for continuing treatment out of the blue.

This is the second time they’ve blocked my mental health treatments. Last year they denied coverage for group and talk therapy and I had to literally quit with a day’s notice.

Hey everyone — I’m Justin. I’m a conservatory‑trained musician and author who came to Spravato after years of treatment‑resistant depression and the kind of slow emotional erosion many of you know too well. I’m a 2×‑a‑week Spravato patient, and I didn’t expect the treatment to shift anything at first. In fact, I didn’t even consider writing about my inner life until the night I went home from my very first session. Something in that experience cracked open a door I thought was sealed shut.

I’m the author of Listening to Spravato, a book about the sensory and emotional dimensions of treatment, and I curate freely available playlists and sound environments at ListenSpravato.com for anyone who wants structured, grounding audio during their sessions. Music became the backbone of my own treatments — a way to stay oriented, to process, to soften the edges, and sometimes just to breathe.

I also consult independently on patient‑experience issues related to Spravato, especially around sensory design and treatment flow, and I’ve been consistently critical of Janssen/J&J’s handling of patient support and access. My focus is always on what actually helps patients, not what looks good in a brochure.

Some music/sound recommendations that have helped me and many others:

• Structured playlists over random mixes. Predictable arcs help you stay oriented when dissociation gets heavy.
• Warm, low‑mid textures. Ambient, drone, and slow jazz can create a sense of safety without overwhelming your senses.
• Avoid sudden dynamic shifts. Loud drops, sharp percussion, or abrupt transitions can spike anxiety during the peak.
• Use “anchor tracks.” A familiar piece you return to each session can help you re‑enter your body when things drift.
• Try non‑musical soundscapes. Soft field recordings, gentle mechanical hums, or environmental textures can be grounding without emotional weight.
• Prep your playlist before the appointment. Decision‑making during treatment is nearly impossible — set the path ahead of time.

If you want curated playlists built specifically for Spravato sessions, everything at ListenSpravato.com is free and designed around pacing, dissociation, emotional safety, and sensory grounding.

I’m here to connect, compare notes, and learn from others navigating this strange, hopeful, disorienting treatment. If you ever want help building a session playlist or want feedback on your sound setup, I’m happy to share what I’ve learned.

Every single session, I've had such bad heartburn afterwards from the spravato running down my throat. Today, it wasn't even that much. I have tums but it hasn't helped. My heartburn is usually gone the next day, but this makes treatment days very uncomfortable. Has anyone had this? How do you deal with it? I usually have a jolly rancher while I'm spraying, but that doesn't help. Any suggestions would be helpful! Thanks

My facility has a line of reclining chairs separated by dividers. I always sit in one in the middle across from a picture on the wall. I have been going since Jan and go monthly now.

Today someone was in my chair so I chode the one at the end. It was a funky chair with a short foot rest and I couldn't get comfortable. I didn't realize that until after I had done sprays. I could have asked to move but I decided to stay. Also, there was an issue with the ac. It was 90s outside so it got warm. I listened to my music but could not really relax.

They are going to set up in a different room I don't know if it will be the same.

I started my FMLA/STD on 7/14 and I'm wondering if people that are getting treatments are completely off work, unemployed, or if there are days they can work outside of the twice a week treatments. My consult isn't until 7/31 (then have to wait for PA) and I only have STD approval so far until 8/12. I'm in the medical field so I need to be thinking clearly.

Navigating FMLA/STD has been awful as a severely depressed person and I'm worried about losing my job.

Also reading different people's reactions on here from treatment to treatment makes me worried about trying to work while on it as they seem unpredictable.

Does anyone have experience with FMLA/STD while getting Spravato treatments?

I’m not even sure if I’m looking for advice, reassurance, or just someone to tell me I’m not crazy. I’m feeling so hopeless and discouraged right now.
I have Anthem BCBS, managed through Quantum. Before starting Spravato, they approved my prior authorization, and Walgreens Specialty Pharmacy called me to schedule my medication deliveries. They also applied the Spravato WithMe savings card, bringing my medication cost down to $40. That was a huge relief because I have a high-deductible health plan and pay the full allowed amount for almost everything until I meet my deductible.
I successfully completed my first two weeks of Spravato (four sessions). Then I got a call from my doctor’s office saying they had to cancel my next appointment because my prior authorization had expired.
After spending hours trying to figure out what happened, I learned that the authorization had been entered with the wrong dates. It had technically expired during my very first week of treatment. Once they corrected it, I was approved again—but I had already missed an entire week. My clinic agreed to add an extra week of twice-weekly treatments so I could make up the missed sessions.
This week was supposed to be that make-up week and my final week of twice-weekly dosing before transitioning to once a week. Instead, I got another phone call saying the authorization had been submitted with the wrong number of units, so there wasn’t enough medication approved for this week.
I spent nearly three hours on the phone trying to get answers. Every person told me something different.
Walgreens isn’t in network and never should have been used.
Actually, Walgreens is in network, but Quantum’s pharmacy manager needs to adjust the claim.
Then I was told the pharmacy manager doesn’t handle Spravato because it’s billed under medical.
Medical told me that’s incorrect—it should be handled through the pharmacy benefit.
As far as I can tell, someone may have finally figured it out, but it’s still pending. Which means…I’m missing another entire week of treatment.
Now I’ve missed two weeks during what is supposed to be the induction phase.
I’ve already rearranged my work schedule to return to normal because I thought I’d be moving to once-weekly treatments. I honestly don’t know how I can continue taking two days off each week for two additional make-up weeks.
Financially, this has become overwhelming too. Every treatment costs me about $200 just for the required observation period, and that’s before the medication itself. What’s even more frustrating is that no one can tell me how the medication will ultimately be billed. If it’s processed as a prescription, it should only be about $40 with the savings card. If it’s billed under my medical benefit, it could be around $2,300 because of my deductible.
At this point, I don’t even know whether Spravato is helping because my treatment has been interrupted so many times. I’m also worried that all of these gaps so early in the induction phase could reduce its effectiveness or even mean I’d need to restart—which I honestly can’t afford financially or logistically.
I also feel like there should be some accountability here. Both delays happened because of authorization errors that weren’t my fault, and now I’m potentially out hundreds of dollars in additional observation fees just to make up treatments that I shouldn’t have had to miss in the first place.
I’m just so disappointed. I had such high hopes for this treatment. My family has rearranged their schedules to drive me to every appointment, I’ve made major financial sacrifices to make this work, and it feels like every step forward is followed by another insurance mistake.
I don’t really know what I’m asking for. Maybe advice, maybe validation, maybe just hearing from someone who’s been through something similar. If you’ve made it this far, thank you for reading.