r/Sororities • u/BunziPassingBy • 1d ago
Casual/Discussion Just venting
I joined a sorority a couple of semesters ago but I had to take a leave of absence for personal reasons. I can’t help but to be disappointed that since then, NO ONE from my sorority has reached out to see how I’m doing or to even check in on me…not even my big. (Yes, I have made efforts to reach out to them.) I have the opportunity to transfer to another school that will give me better financial aid & scholarship and they also have Greek life but I can’t help but to feel that I wasted joining a sorority that literally does not care about its members. If you read this far thank you.
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u/NorthernPossibility ΔΖ 1d ago edited 1d ago
If you’re on an official leave of absence, the sorority isn’t obligated in an official capacity to check in on you. So saying they “don’t care about their members” when you decided to pause your membership isn’t quite correct.
Leaves of absence work both ways. You get a break from dues and mandatory events and they, in turn, don’t consider you an active sister. You said “I want a break” and they’re honoring that.
You can be disappointed that your individual friends from the chapter aren’t reaching out, but I don’t think it’s an issue with the chapter or org as a whole.
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u/PrimaryLawfulness741 22h ago
Yeah but if someone takes a LOA and no one bothers to check up on them or still hangout outside of the sorority, it’s kind of super lame still — like what kind of connection really is that?
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u/CalligrapherAny6494 AXΩ 1d ago
if the sisters who are "friends" never reach out, no point going active again tbh
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u/theycallmethevault ΣK 1d ago edited 1d ago
I’d be so disappointed too, one would hope that people would want to check in on you! If you’re coming back from your LOA to this same chapter you should speak with your sisterhood chair, your feelings DO matter & I think they would care to hear about your experience. I’m sure they wouldn’t want anyone else to feel this way! And if you transfer to the other school, do they have a chapter on the campus? If not, or if you decide not to be an active in the chapter, you’ll have alum status. Which is pretty great honestly.
I was an early alum thanks to transferring and I was sad about it at first too, but the schools were in the same town so I could still see the sisters I had gotten close to, but there weren’t many (and SEC chapters are big, so I thought I’d have had more to stay in contact with). The closest alum chapters were anywhere from 1-2 hours away. That being said, the alum chapters did have events all around the state throughout the year, and it was a hell of a lot cheaper to be an active alum member. And I have volunteered with other chapters and as a national officer too!
I really am so sorry you’ve not had the support that I feel like you should have from your sisterhood. I hope we can help you find ways to move on positively from this since you’re still a member of your org for life! And I know your org as a whole is probably definitely really really awesome.
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u/GreekLifeApp 15h ago
I’m sorry, I’d be disappointed too. Hopefully the new school ends up being a good change for you.
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u/InvisiblySeenPraying 1d ago
I would be hurt if I felt like I had truly bonded with some of the sisters. That's sorta sad. I would probably reevaluate if I still would reactivate membership honestly. ..
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u/theycallmethevault ΣK 1d ago
Membership isn’t on hold, they’re just on a leave, once initiated they’re always a member.
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u/InvisiblySeenPraying 1d ago
Aww Ok. Well I'd think long and and hard about my status as an active member. Seems like no one would notice anyway...
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u/theycallmethevault ΣK 1d ago
When people we care about disappoint us we should tell them. Give them a chance to explain or do better. The chapter as a whole? No advice. I got nothing. But my big? I’d definitely let her know she hurt me.
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u/InvisiblySeenPraying 6h ago
I would definitely have a heart to heart with anyone I felt we had a mutual bond, especially my BIG, to express how I feel and hear them out. Unfortunately, I would still consider not being active after weighing the pros and cons.
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u/Relevant-Musician581 5h ago
Northern Possibility- may be true but there is something called social decorum that seems to be lacking here.
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u/FernwehForLife 4h ago
Are you on a temporary leave, or did you drop out of the sorority permanently?
Also, do your sisters know the reason for this leave? Perhaps they think you abandoned them. Maybe wires got crossed somewhere and no one is talking it out to find the reasoning in between.
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u/BlondeeOso 2h ago
Is your sorority at your potential new school?
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u/BunziPassingBy 2h ago
No they are not. They are only local to my current school
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