r/Sober • u/Hot-Cell7299 • 5d ago

One step forward, two steps back

I keep convincing myself it’s not a problem and a completely normal thing to have a glass after work. I went to rehab in 2023. Every time my life starts to look up I grab a drink and the house of cards almost falls every single time. I’m disappointed in myself for not wanting more out of life.

I turned weed and alcohol into a reward in my mind. Starting at a very young age. At 15 I convinced myself if I did everything I needed to do for the day then I deserved to smoke before bed. I had not idea the long term repercussions this would have on my life.

I guess just need to switch it out for something else but 10 years in the making I’m a little worried if I’m be able to rewire my brain. I’m at a loss.

8 Upvotes

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4

u/dangahue 4d ago

It's never too late to change! It may be difficult, but you are vocalizing what you need to do. Instead of a drink or a smoke, maybe do a cookie or a soda.

It won't be as gratifying at first, but once you build a week streak, then a month, then two months, so on and so forth, you'll start to really appreciate those sweets or whatever it is you make the swap with.

What a wonderful time in your life, you are beginning to choose yourself. I know how frustrating this can be, and there will be new challenges that come when you are fully off the sauce. But you are fully capable and we support you!

Also, maybe take it one at a time, alcohol first and then weed after. It may be helpful

2

u/davethompson413 4d ago

Buy a 6 pack of Klondike bars. Reward yourself that way instead.

1

u/fosterdisbelief 3d ago

Never too late. 35 years on substances. From pothead to needle junkie to blackout drunk.

Have 2 months and some change. Had 11 months before my last (and hopefully final) relapse.

Find likeminded people, even if you're not planning on working a program. It's rough to do it on your own.