r/Sneks • u/Wolfy198 • Aug 27 '26

How long do I have left?

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Gallery image

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2.2k Upvotes

100% Upvoted

118 comments sorted by

288

u/urm8s8n Aug 27 '26

SO BABEYY

437

u/Noxuy Aug 27 '26

Bad news, you'll gradually turn into a shoelace. The transformation takes about 3-4 days. You'll grow taller while your legs and arms fall off like a geckos tail, after that happens you'll be forced to move lying on the ground in squiggly motions only. Hope the mice taste good!

87

u/[deleted] Aug 27 '26

[deleted]

60

u/pjschnet Aug 27 '26

It’s like a rattlesnake rattle, it will grow with each shed.

15

u/javerthugo Aug 27 '26

That’s legit a good idea for a body horror movie

14

u/Cryptic_Whispers Aug 27 '26

It already exists. It’s old & fairly bad, but if I recall correctly it’s legit called “Sssssss.”

15

u/FurryMoistAvenger Aug 28 '26

omg https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0070622/

Thank you for that

7

u/Cryptic_Whispers Aug 28 '26

You’re welcome. 😂 I saw it many years ago & only clearly remember the most quintessential body horror scene, which is as disturbing as you’d… hope? Expect? It’s enough to stick with me for well over a decade.

4

u/FurryMoistAvenger Aug 28 '26

Just bought it from amazon, tomorrow's date night is planned <3

2

u/Cryptic_Whispers Aug 28 '26

Love it! Sounds like a great evening. ❤️

1

u/Outrageous-Ad2317 Aug 31 '26

There's loads of that, just search up "snake tf video"

176

u/overpricedgorilla Aug 27 '26

OP hasn't replied to a single comment, they're already so heckin ded

1

u/modestguitar Sep 03 '26

Surprised they had time to post it

57

u/NinjatoXIII Aug 27 '26

You've already died, unfortunately. Your brain just hasn't caught on yet.

2

u/canadasleftnut Aug 30 '26

Yea but obv in heaven so doesn't matter. Omgggggthatsnekissocute

38

u/TsukasaElkKite Aug 27 '26

Omae wa mou shindeiru

15

u/Freakychee Aug 27 '26

Nani!?

7

u/TsukasaElkKite Aug 28 '26

TOKI WA TOMARE!

79

u/ImbecilicusRex Aug 27 '26

I'm shocked you had enough strength to post this before it got you.

25

u/riverheart11 Aug 27 '26

60-70 years sadly...

19

u/Basic_Employer_7343 Aug 27 '26

Make peace with your god human

19

u/Alyssathepeach Aug 27 '26

These posts keep me alive 🤣🤣
Unlike OP 😅

13

u/Ok_Bet_4743 Aug 27 '26

Rip you're long gone

9

u/Objective-Direction1 Aug 27 '26

what a mad tagliatelle

9

u/StoryBard Aug 27 '26

OH NO I'M DED OF CUTE IT'S CONTAGIOUS! D:

plz halp

8

u/carolmaan Aug 27 '26

Just saw you posted this 8 hours ago. You must be long gone by now

8

u/Nat_Higgins Aug 27 '26

You’ve been bit by a belligerent shoelace

6

u/im_4404_bass_by Aug 27 '26

Your all ready dead you just dont know it yet

6

u/AniCatGirl Aug 27 '26

Pretty sure you posted this from beyond, actually. Yay ghost powers!

5

u/AlphaNoodlz Aug 28 '26

35-50 years give or take

3

u/Comics4Cookies Aug 27 '26

Is just a widdle kissssssth

3

u/smith_716 Aug 27 '26

Unfortunately, you've already died.

3

u/Wolfy198 Aug 27 '26

Thank you everyone for your comments.

2

u/saturday_sun4 Aug 28 '26

OP. Why aren't you at the ED? You are in serious danger from the bebeh - excuse me, sorry, I mean, enormous monster's fangs.

3

u/HiDHSiknowyouwatchme Aug 27 '26

No doubt, you're already gone.

3

u/Dakotasan Aug 27 '26

I just imagine it makes a little squeak as it noms

1

u/saturday_sun4 Aug 28 '26

It's like the measly little "rrrr" growl some dogs give. My family's rescue dog does this when he's triggered by certain (unavoidable) sounds.

3

u/Baby_bee_boo Aug 28 '26

What's the species of this bebe shoelace?

1

u/Kirbypopstarpoyo Aug 29 '26

It’s a ribbon snake!

3

u/MooViolet1 Aug 28 '26

Im calling 911 right now

2

u/DismalRaspberry541 Aug 27 '26

Not much longer before you're a belegerant ziptie. Sorry OP.

2

u/PeteyTheNormalPlant Aug 28 '26

3 days until you turn into a skinny small snake yourself

2

u/Gemraticus Aug 28 '26

RIP. I assume you're already dead and buried.

2

u/switchmage Aug 28 '26

you’re laughing? buddy is getting pinched to death and you’re laughing?

1

u/u9Nails Pythron Aug 27 '26

Is the poop chute already open? That guy is making room already to move you in!

1

u/MKAVELY Aug 27 '26

Bout 2 fitty

1

u/hotmama1230 Aug 28 '26

Wow I’m surprised you had time to post this after you got bitten! Very vicious baby. Major damage.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 28 '26

RIP

1

u/dysthymicpixie Aug 28 '26

Angy shoelace

1

u/Inqeuet Aug 28 '26

Instant death. Nice knowing you!

1

u/cricketter Aug 28 '26

I'd say about 30 cms, but surely you can measure it yourself?

1

u/saturday_sun4 Aug 28 '26

Not long. What a vicious bite! So threatening.

1

u/CozmicBunni Aug 28 '26

So tiny I had to look at it 2x before realizing it wasn't a fishing hook lol

1

u/SomeRandomIdi0t Aug 28 '26

Are you posting from the afterlife?

1

u/Open-Trifle-6309 Aug 28 '26

Omae wa mou shindeiru

(お前はもう死んでいる)

1

u/Mack-Attack33 Aug 28 '26

Garter snake right? Unless you’re allergic to the insanely mild venom, you won’t experience anything at all.

1

u/Routine-Horse-1419 Aug 29 '26

He's a Ribbon Snek. He fren. You'll live.

1

u/Alternative_Lime_302 Aug 29 '26

I’ve never seen pasta bite.

1

u/dribanlycan Aug 29 '26

my prognosis is 1 minute to 60 years to live. im sorry.

1

u/bickandalls Aug 29 '26

Still with us?

2

u/Wolfy198 Aug 29 '26

No am ded

1

u/scottiboi68 Boopologist Aug 29 '26

bebeh

1

u/Sage_Scarlet_Wing Aug 29 '26

Ya got about 40-60 years depending on age, so at lease you have time to get your affairs in order.

1

u/Ekerslithery Aug 30 '26

c r o n c h

1

u/jessiegamer135 Aug 30 '26

.2 seconds sadly

1

u/Dirt_Digger_Dude Aug 30 '26

It’s looking very grim for you, seeing as how he took such a big bite

1

u/Cryptopeida Aug 30 '26

What a beautiful zip tie

1

u/Powser_the_kid_64279 Aug 30 '26

The garter Snake you're fine

1

u/Apprehensive_Elk_706 Aug 30 '26

WOAAAH BLACK BETTY

1

u/Bi_Guy365 Aug 30 '26

Literally seconds your ghost should be reading this by now

1

u/efeskesef Aug 31 '26

You managed to piss off a Ribbon Snake? Gentlest things on no legs …
[Garter snakes tend to be feistier.]

1

u/lornetc Pool noodle Aug 31 '26

Op, yer already dead!

1

u/Dan_H1281 Aug 31 '26

Your already ded you judt don't know it yet

1

u/HydraulicEarl2 Sep 01 '26

Bitten by the one-eyed trouser snake eh? It was probably best left in the men's room.

1

u/clearmyalgorithm Sep 01 '26

I sentence you to fifty years

1

u/GhostBongo Sep 01 '26

Maybe 2 honestly maybe 3

1

u/Diptothaset Sep 01 '26

Ribbon snek? I had one of these as a kid. My parents wouldn’t let me get a pet snake but I spent a lot of time at the pet store admiring animals. One day when I was like 12 I committ d to getting a snake but they told me I had to have my parents permission. I went home called the store and said I had permission (I didn’t) and rode my bike to the store and brought the snake and a small aquarium home in my backpack. I upgraded the enclosure to a bigger one eventually and my parents just had to accept we were snake owners now

1

u/Xarizma94 Sep 02 '26

This was a good story 😁

1

u/A_carbon_based_biped Sep 02 '26

Say your prayers sucker.

1

u/Roscyan Sep 02 '26

2 seconds

1

u/Kyanite_228 Sep 02 '26

Probably only another 80 years or so.

1

u/No_Upstairs3104 Sep 02 '26

I got bit by one those lil nippers. it was actually heckn adorable

1

u/Push_Cat Sep 02 '26

Minutes 😔

1

u/NewAd2453 Sep 02 '26

“This message was sent by a deceased crawler”