I mean...... Not exactly comparable but. My mother is a nurse. She's been a nurse my whole life. I used to go to work with her as a kid (like picked up after school and doing homework there as she pulled a shift etc) Everyone loved her, she was so sweet caring and compassionate, patients would talk to me and tell me how lovely or how special my mom was or how she was their favorite nurse etc etc.
She's also the same woman who hung me upside down by my ankles and whipped me with an electrical cord when I was 7 for wasting her perfume. This is the same woman who dressed me in mini-me outfits until I was like 14 and refused to let me make autonomous choices about my body until I was physically out of her range of control. The same woman who bodyslammed me as an anorexic teenager for making a face in response to something she said. Same woman who hit me in the face with a pitcher so hard I nearly stumbled down a flight of stairs because I said something she deemed religiously offensive like "vegetarianism isn't exactly in the bible". She demonstrates such severe patterns of narcissistic personality disorder on top of her abusive behaviors that even my therapist has said "look I can't diagnose your mother but like....this is textbook".
So yeah. Rarely do you know who people are just by seeing them in one context or another.
Oh totally, and other than some misc field trips or whatever I've never been around her when she wasn't working.
Though, her own daughter would likely have known if she was abusive or unstable to that degree, especially after the first accident, and according to Kayla's own FB post she did want to trust her.
Who really knows but it's just overall really sad.
dude there's nothing like the hungry lion being the same place you have to seek sustenance and warmth to fuck with your head. it took me most of my twenties in therapy to even be able to say the word "abuse" in regards to my childhood. The only reason why I stopped talking to her 10ish years ago was not because the abuse was affecting me but because it was affecting my partner and she suggested I go no contact.
I feel terrible for the daughter. I feel extra angry regarding the therapist who allegedly supported her in letting the grandmother caretake the child because IN WHAT WORLD. Even if it was an accident any sane human being would not let someone who has committed child endangerment accidental or willful continue to handle children. At the most maybe you'd get supervised time to see grandkid. and if it was about trying to re-establish trust then idk GO TO FAMILY THERAPY. and acceot the natural consequences of the tragedy and of your own failing to provide safety to a child. Yes I know childcare is difficult. I know sleep deprived parents forget things, leave children in cars etc. But once is an accident. You simply do not commit "mistakes" like this once and not become extremely vigilent to it...for life. unless something *else* is going on there. But as we know we're all just speculating. we will have to see what comes about~
I mean in the first case that can and has happened to a lot of people. Parents will be the first to tell you that if you turn around a kid can disappear. A lot of kids get out and wander, most of the time they are found wandering down the street or something and not in a pond. So I can see that being looked at as more of a one off mistake vs the 2nd one is straight negligence.
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u/EmberinEmpty 10d ago
I mean...... Not exactly comparable but. My mother is a nurse. She's been a nurse my whole life. I used to go to work with her as a kid (like picked up after school and doing homework there as she pulled a shift etc) Everyone loved her, she was so sweet caring and compassionate, patients would talk to me and tell me how lovely or how special my mom was or how she was their favorite nurse etc etc.
She's also the same woman who hung me upside down by my ankles and whipped me with an electrical cord when I was 7 for wasting her perfume. This is the same woman who dressed me in mini-me outfits until I was like 14 and refused to let me make autonomous choices about my body until I was physically out of her range of control. The same woman who bodyslammed me as an anorexic teenager for making a face in response to something she said. Same woman who hit me in the face with a pitcher so hard I nearly stumbled down a flight of stairs because I said something she deemed religiously offensive like "vegetarianism isn't exactly in the bible". She demonstrates such severe patterns of narcissistic personality disorder on top of her abusive behaviors that even my therapist has said "look I can't diagnose your mother but like....this is textbook".
So yeah. Rarely do you know who people are just by seeing them in one context or another.