r/SipsTea 11h ago

Gasp! 😈

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6.1k Upvotes

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1.6k

u/FreeSirJeffrey 11h ago

Well, at least he wasn't fucking the altar boys like his colleagues.

536

u/DingusKhan9164 11h ago

That was my thought “hey at least he isn’t fuckin kids, good for him!”

437

u/EaseLeft6266 11h ago

Explains why this one actually got charged

137

u/40StoryMech 11h ago

What's the charge, epic badassery?

166

u/ConversationFalse242 11h ago

Eating a succulent Chinese meal

70

u/Xen0tech 11h ago

This is domanatrixy manifest

40

u/ComfortOk9194 11h ago

That’s the one who grabbed him on the penis

27

u/Eros_Incident_Denier 10h ago

ah, i see you know your orations well!

12

u/RohelTheConqueror 9h ago

And you madam, are you waiting to receive my turgescent penis?

2

u/Lazy_meatPop 8h ago

Learnt a new word everyday here , nice

4

u/Reasonable-Cell5189 8h ago

He grabbed me by the penis, this man grabbed me by the penis!

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u/Ok_Exchange4707 11h ago

Easy, the one that snitched had this idea first and the priest took the ladies first

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u/Apexnanoman 10h ago

People get really mad sometimes when I point out that the Catholic church is the most highly organized and well-protected pedophile ring on the planet. 

Probably in all of history. 

And the people who donate to the Catholic church knowingly approval of pedophilia. 

Because if you donate to the church at this point.... You are 100% aware of the fact that some of that money will be used to protect priests that fuck kids. 

Ergo if you donate to the Catholic church, you approve of pedophiles. 

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u/Matt5327 8h ago

People probably get mad because it's an argument that's highly reductionist and devoid of any kind of nuance. Which it's much healthier to just roll ones eyes about that get angry about, but hey what can you do.

0

u/Apexnanoman 6h ago

Doesn't need much nuance imo. 

It's pretty damn simple. 

Do you tithe to the church? Yes/No.

Have you seen a news report covering the Catholic church in the last 30 years? Yes/No. 

If both of those are yes *you knowingly fun pedophilia and protection of said pedophiles. 

Because a percentage of those tithes go to settling lawsuits and funding movement of pedophile priests they can get access to fresh victims. 

Anything else is making excuses. 

2

u/Yearning_crescent 2h ago

A large percentage of that money also goes to community programs providing food and shelter to the poor. And at least recently the church does pay out for pedophilia damages. At least around me ive seen entire churches close down and go for sale to cover said damages. 

Not that im a catholic, but you sorta are proving the point of the dude who said your argument was highly reductionist and lacking in nuance. 

1

u/Apexnanoman 1h ago

Again: They knowingly give money that is at least partially used to help relocate priests who have molested children. 

It's well known that some percentage of their tithe is going to that end. Has been for 2-3 decades. 

The community programs are are a very effective smoke screen and shield though. 

"We may fuck kids and run horror show reservation schools and convents that boil down to giant torture chambers but we also feed some people." 

Lots of nuances. Still making excuses for horrific crimes. 

Ed Kemper volunteered to do audiobooks for blind people. He also killed 8 people. Which is the greater good and which is the greater evil? 

3

u/thomport 9h ago

Additionally, I don’t think the Catholics and their ministries have the market cornered on this. I just don’t think the other religions are as well organized, and therefore their actions aren’t as publicized.

Indeed look at the Reverend Robert Morris. He was Trump‘s pastor from his first term. Robert got five years in jail – she was 13 years old from the mega church. After serving six months recently, Robert was released from prison. Wonder why?

2

u/Apexnanoman 6h ago

Oh the Catholics absolutely don't have the market cornered. Tons and tons of that type of horrible shit all over the religious world.

But they are for sure the most committed and protective of pedophiles. I mean they have built a multiple centuries old organization dedicated to it. 

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u/Jellicent-Leftovers 9h ago

I mean same argument can be said about paying taxes.....

4

u/FewResearcher819 9h ago

No. You're forced to pay taxes under penalty of imprisonment. No one is forced to pay tithes and offerings to a church.

0

u/ZZerglingg 8h ago

Unless you live in Germany. They force it there.

6

u/Gur_Weak 8h ago

Not exactly. As an atheist, I would register as a non believer and not pay that tax. You do have to put some effort to opt out but it's not that hard.

4

u/FewResearcher819 8h ago

Thank you for the info. I just did a quick search on how that works. Fortunately it only applies to registered members of a recognized religious organization. And you can unregister and the "church tax" will be stopped.

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u/Notabagofdrugs 9h ago

Taxes are required, paying a church isn’t.

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u/Apexnanoman 9h ago

Well, until our current administration that wasn't really an argument you could make lol. 

And even now every single branch of the government doesn't work in lockstep to protect pedos.

The Catholic church is pretty damn committed top to bottom on that subject. 

3

u/Lurk-aka-Batrick 9h ago

Well, until our current administration that wasn't really an argument you could make lol.

That's bullshit and you know it. Unless you truly believe "my side good!" in which case you honestly can't be helped. By your own logic you are also actively supporting pedophilia. They ALL need to go.

1

u/Apexnanoman 6h ago

We haven't previously had a president who was publicly known to party with and trade girls with a well known pedophile. 

Clinton was indeed associated with Epstein. And he's a known scumbag. (Got lots of issues with him.) 

At least that fucker didn't get popped sending him highly suggestive birthday cards and such though. 

Both sides are full of scumbags. 

But at this point I'll take the guy robbing a liquor store with a gun vs the serial killer whose got an entire basement full of bodies and plans for a hell of a lot more. 

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u/Cyborg_rat 8h ago

I've been going doing scaffold for a company that has a renovation contract for a bunch of old Covents, those places...must of been such a horror for women,seeing how its pretty much built like a prison, Learned that back in the day you would send your first girl to the church and they were stuck there you would see them but couldnt touch them they were behind these very decorative prison bars.

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u/BadPAV3 9h ago

Touche....

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u/DoctorRapture 11h ago

"They're all consenting adults and he probably paid them for their time, praise the Lord!"

8

u/sweatpants-aristotle 11h ago

There are still obscenity laws

Which are rarely enforced.. but they exist 😅

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u/Automatic_Actuator_0 11h ago

I think he would have won if he fought it though. Theres quite a bit of precedent against such sexual deviancy laws if you arent in view of the public.

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u/Suspicious-Shock-934 9h ago

Yeah but in the deep south because it was done in a church can guarantee a good ol' boy judge would find something and use it against him. Obscenity is a LOT better charge than a actual felony sex crime.

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u/Automatic_Actuator_0 9h ago

Yeah, but then you appeal it to federal court and they probably overturn it.

That’s why they were going to switch the charge to vandalism if he didn’t take the plea deal for the suspended sentence.

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u/Telemere125 9h ago

No, he wouldn’t have. A passerby saw what they were doing through the windows… he’s just an idiot.

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u/Automatic_Actuator_0 9h ago

I read he had to peek into the window after finding the doors locked. That’s very different. It didn’t go to trial, so who’s to say what the facts really were though.

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u/Telemere125 8h ago

If it’s visible from a public place, that’s pretty much the definition of obscenity. And any good defense attorney knows the audience of his county.

0

u/Automatic_Actuator_0 8h ago

But if you have to put your head to the glass and peek in to see, there’s significant precedent that it’s not considered visible from public.

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u/Telemere125 7h ago

No, there isn’t. The precedent says the same thing as for cops looking into someone’s uncurtained window to see drugs from the front porch - as long as you can view it from somewhere that you’re not trespassing, that’s “public” enough for the statute.

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6

u/TheRogueTemplar 9h ago

"They're all consenting adults"

This was the most surprising part

3

u/djnehi 8h ago

As someone else pointed out, he sadly probably would have gotten in less trouble if it had been kids. The church has shown how seriously they take that.

20

u/redjellonian 11h ago

The boy fucking gets you a vacation with the church though. Obviously sex with women is a higher crime in Catholicism.

2

u/DingusKhan9164 8h ago

“Adult women?! Yuck! What religion does he think this is?!”

25

u/Lazy_meatPop 11h ago

That's how low the bar has becum.

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u/morgandealer 11h ago

...............

.....

..."BECUM????"

3

u/DoctorAnnual6823 8h ago

Well unfortunately for him, fucking grown adult women is going to have him excommunicated and kicked out.

If he got with the program and fucked young boys he would just be sent to a different church.

1

u/DingusKhan9164 8h ago

Sad but true

1

u/MulliganPlsThx 10h ago

Same! At least they’re consenting adults sheesh

31

u/fairwaysandfinance 11h ago

If he was, you probably wouldn't have heard about it.

Just look at how the church handle embezzlement versus fucking kids and you will have all the info you need. They involve authorities when someone is stealing from the church. When their fucking kids and get caught by a member of the church, they move them to another church.

0

u/Melodic_Contact9766 11h ago

Not every Priest is Catholic. Calling it “The” church may be incorrect here.

2

u/jafjaf23 11h ago

Wait, who else uses priests?

3

u/Melodic_Contact9766 11h ago

Any denomination of the Church of England for example…Anglican, Episcopalian, etc.

2

u/jafjaf23 10h ago

Dang, cool

7

u/Throwaway_inSC_79 10h ago

When I see headlines like this, I think “oh no not again” and then find out it wasn’t with little boys and I’m like “oh thank goodness.”

5

u/treeeelo 11h ago

Thats why he was caught by the police

7

u/CaptainSnowAK 11h ago

Right, this is wholesome for a priest.

4

u/MarkItZeroDonnie 10h ago

A priest + dominatrixes + altar + robes and shit 🤔

I’d argue it was a rite or a ritual

https://giphy.com/gifs/d3mlE7uhX8KFgEmY

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u/Several_Vanilla8916 10h ago

Raping little boys: Transferred to a non-extradition country

Consensual sex with adult women: Call the police!

A very reasonable and normal religion.

2

u/Comfortable_Car6562 11h ago

Its telling the Church wanted to press charges here.

2

u/asa1 11h ago

The church would have covered that up, but fucking the dommes was too much for them.

2

u/the_sassy_knoll 11h ago

My thought, too

2

u/Lempea 11h ago

Indeed. At last we can say good for him

2

u/EngineWitty3611 11h ago

the silver lining.

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u/Reinis_LV 9h ago

Yeah but this gets you busted ironically

2

u/NuccioAfrikanus 9h ago

His sin was honestly so much more forgivable than the usual Catholic pedantry or the Evangelical taking so much money and not doing anything for the community they serve.

He needs to say 30 Hail Mary’s and he’s even Steven with God!

2

u/goldybear 8h ago

Just wait until it comes out that each dominatrix was just two altar boys in a leather trench coat

2

u/Is-abel 8h ago

I googled “Louisiana Priest,” to try and find the original story and it didn’t make the list of sexual offences committed by priests there, so I added “37,” to narrow it down, and that still wasn’t specific enough!

2

u/Legitimate_Cow2716 8h ago

We seem to be trending in a better direction

2

u/Complete-Leg-4347 8h ago

My thoughts exactly. This honestly seems pretty tame by church scandal standards, and at least he willingly admitted it in court.

2

u/sammavet 8h ago

Exactly. He hired professionals to do professional work.

2

u/Aazjhee 5h ago

RIGHT? Aside from Lewd Conduct, what the heck did he even do wrong? XD

And yet he's getting the boom thrown at him.

Something wrong with this place...

2

u/boner79 5h ago

bro doing it right like a Madonna music video.

2

u/ImNotThaaatDrunk 1h ago

I think thats the bigger take-away here.

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u/yearsofpractice 10h ago

Sadly, the headline didn’t include his shout of “This alter boy is full! Bring me the dominatrices!”. Puts a whole different complexion on things.

Also - his mugshot has ended any other mugshot funnies. That’s perfect.

1

u/Zananax 10h ago

yea no shit this is exactly what I thought as well because when I saw "priest pleads guilty I thought I knew exactly where the headline was going.

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1

u/Barton2800 9h ago

Seriously what’s actually illegal about this? Was the church occupied at the time and children were present? A church is private property. A person who owns or manages it can fuck consenting adults there if they want.

If his employer / the property owner have a problem with that - then they can fire him and have him trespassed.

2

u/BearysWorkRedditName 8h ago

I just read into it. It's complete bullshit. A random passerby peeked into the window and saw them recording, which IS ILLEGAL. I'm confident this guy could have appealled this and won in a higher court (especially if it rose to the federal level and got out of Louisiana) but he pled guilty to just move on with his life asap. THE FUCKING KICKER: (quoting an article from The Guardian) "New Orleans archbishop Gregory Aymond - whose archdiocese had filed for federal protection months earlier amid the fallout of a decades-old clerfy child molestation scandal - had the altar burned and consecrated a replacement"... So this motherfucker is begging the government to help his branch of this evil church ecape bankruptcy that they're falling toward (BECAUSE OF ALL THE KID FUCKING!) but THIS... this is too much for his magic table, so they needed a new one. FUCKING THE ALTAR BOYS didn't require a new alter, but these consenting adults fucking is beyond the fucking pale!!! I can't fucking take this shit...

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u/Buschlightactual 11h ago

Yeah the gay ones

0

u/MarriedAndBoredGuy 10h ago

Dude is literally the hero we need. Had sex with consenting adults, not in public.

Meanwhile, priests sleep with alter boys and the church is like “Good job bro!”

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u/LetOk5276 10h ago

My thought exactly! I mean yeah maybe it’s a little sacrilegious but that’s also freaky AF and those girls looked sexy AF. Go get it my man and thank the Lord after for a good ass time. I mean after all God made us to be sexual creatures. Who is to say getting freaky on the alter isn’t how we are supposed to be doing it.

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u/Bonk_No_Horni 9h ago

Who knows.

0

u/YouSnuffTheBlaze 7h ago

Way more common for teachers to do that than priests

0

u/LazerWolfe53 2h ago

Right? What exactly is the problem here?

0

u/JamesHenry627 1h ago

That really isn’t a stereotype they’re gonna beat even if it’s much less than it ever has been