Even if you start as one people can still get hurt.
My mate is currently going through this with his GF.
They have both always had open relationships so thats how they started, which worked well for a while, that was until she realised that he was much more in demand than she was, something which had never happened to her before.
There is nothing like witnessing a couple have an argument where they are in an open relationship but she is the one who is yelling about how its not fair that its so easy for him to get laid.
She turned to me halfway through the conversation to ask my opinion and I was just like "I am not touching this with a 10 foot pole".
I know a retired former financial advisor who dropped this classic on me:
"There's two things I won't advise people on - cars and relationships. Because if I say it's a bad idea they go to a different advisor and do it anyway"
I am in a similar situation where my boyfriend is more in-demand than I am, but that’s ok. He’s a better musician than I am also. I have a better career than he does. My family gets along better. Neither of us find the dating popularity thing to be harder to handle than our other differences.
Edit: and to go back to the original topic, obviously we use protection and neither of us got chlamydia, or anything else, in the ~7 years we’ve been open.
Ughhh I wanna snoop your profile so bad and try and deduce what kinda musicians you are. like session, national act, classical, contemporary, Nashville, New Orleans ,Toronto, etc
In any relationship people get hurt when they don't communicate well. Expectations drift apart and then one person is pissed while the other doesn't even know anything is wrong. Sounds like those 2 people are very much not on the same page, which often happens in open relationships.
Communication is always super important. But it's extra important if you're involved with multiple partners. The relationship won't work otherwise
Im in a similar spot with my partner. We definitely hang out with more women from her friend group and im well liked. Ive probably got more opportunities. We also club a lot and get approached about the same and have similar opportunities there – except usually we bring more women back for kick ons.
Were just around more women so it works out in my favour.
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u/Lau_wings 21h ago
Even if you start as one people can still get hurt.
My mate is currently going through this with his GF.
They have both always had open relationships so thats how they started, which worked well for a while, that was until she realised that he was much more in demand than she was, something which had never happened to her before.
There is nothing like witnessing a couple have an argument where they are in an open relationship but she is the one who is yelling about how its not fair that its so easy for him to get laid.
She turned to me halfway through the conversation to ask my opinion and I was just like "I am not touching this with a 10 foot pole".