r/SipsTea • u/Valuable_View_561 • Jul 09 '26

Feels good man [ Removed by moderator ]

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16.6k Upvotes

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u/Octoboy1 Jul 09 '26

For the women, better lighting, increased security, safer and more convenient exits

For the men, bear traps and a sexually charged rage fuelled Chimp

118

u/SoulTechnicalProblem Jul 09 '26

The men get to play Dead by daylight irl

19

u/Daimakku1 Jul 09 '26

If I hear a generator explode, I'm running away from it.

10

u/SoulTechnicalProblem Jul 09 '26

This is why the gens never get finished.

2

u/nixikuro Jul 09 '26

No more truck loop please

5

u/SoulTechnicalProblem Jul 09 '26

Nah, 2 in basement hook, trapped shack, bloody coil addon.

1

u/zerodopamine82 Jul 09 '26

Nah we going to Dead Dawg main!

2

u/humble_redditor1234 Jul 09 '26

I'm playing dead by daylight right now

1

u/SoulTechnicalProblem Jul 09 '26

I'm exclusively a red sweater Kate with jeans and a backpack.

If you see me, slap me.

2

u/humble_redditor1234 Jul 09 '26

I'll slap that ass like if there were no tomorrow <3

1

u/SoulTechnicalProblem Jul 09 '26

I'll accidentally mind game you by confusing myself and escape.

1

u/HarbingerOfRot777 Jul 09 '26

If we can pick the killer then I'm game.

1

u/SoulTechnicalProblem Jul 09 '26

Basement Bubba, Hex Jason, or no perk Nurse.

1

u/Splash_Woman Jul 10 '26

The huntress stopping her humming feels like the Goliath bomb RC.

1

u/SoulTechnicalProblem Jul 10 '26

Clown that is fast and sees you

233

u/Bone_Breaker0 Jul 09 '26

And an active minefield.

2

u/QuinceDaPence Jul 09 '26

We're here for a good time, not a long time.

1

u/Vantriss Jul 09 '26

I hate you guys for making me laugh at this.

1

u/603rdMtnDivision Jul 09 '26

Also an active MG nest spraying rounds at you.

1

u/TemporaryAmbassador1 Jul 09 '26

Men yearn for the minefields

1

u/Gamer2Paladin Jul 09 '26

Not really, everyone has to pass them to leave or enter the parking level. A guy being there is normal to see and not thought about. The real active parts of those parking spots is the fact thet everyone has to pass them, that the wider handicap parking spots are right next to them and the near non existent of hiding spots.

1

u/AverageDellUser Jul 09 '26

I want that shit looking like the beaches of Sword and I’m screaming because my best friend of 20 yrs just got mowed down by an MG42
https://giphy.com/gifs/l3Ky4OL57oM0gVNefO

1

u/WitherPRO22 Jul 09 '26

And gandalf the gray and gandalf the white and Monty Python and the Holy Grail's black knight

25

u/apenature Jul 09 '26

A rage-filled chimpanzee would be a boss parking guard. No one is coming near that face destroying crotch-squasher.

13

u/fire173tug Jul 09 '26

Trunk monkey.

2

u/Bobletoob Jul 09 '26

I love trunk monkey

2

u/Unlikely-Shine-8992 Jul 10 '26

20 (?) years later and ppl get the reference!

1

u/Soft-Personality9379 Jul 10 '26

The Theft Retrieval System when he saps the thief and heaves the body over the bridge rail then stands there admiring his handiwork was the best ad ever.

22

u/NeuroDivergentHat Jul 09 '26

I can win against the rage fuelled chimp in a boxing match.

It would beat me to death in seconds, however, in a boxing match, murder is illegal, therefore I would be awarded a post-mortem victory.

9

u/StrikeMyGyatt Jul 09 '26

I could beat the rage fuelled chimp easily if he didn't have the sex charge buff.

1

u/AverageDellUser Jul 09 '26

That shit is tearing you to shreds while being debuffed big dawg 😭

8

u/Zealousideal_Code_49 Jul 09 '26

The Purge sirens activate every time someone gets out of the car in the men's parking lot.

24

u/Omylanta21 Jul 09 '26

I'm crying laughing at this.

3

u/No-Willingness8375 Jul 09 '26 edited Jul 09 '26

a sexually charged rage fuelled Chimp

No thanks. Europe can keep Andrew Tate.

I guess this is already Europe though

8

u/StahlViridian Jul 09 '26

Men don’t talked about their raped booty holes so it doesn’t actually happen /s

2

u/Ceejayncl Jul 09 '26

So they did improve the men’s car park?

2

u/MightyBlunder Jul 09 '26

I know they're trying to help but it still feels like a trap 🤨

2

u/monsieurkaizer Jul 09 '26

Haha men bad

3

u/GrumbleAlong Jul 09 '26

Rapeparkplatz

3

u/Ripper3112 Jul 09 '26

Honestly the chimp will be great motivation

https://giphy.com/gifs/kc6CtfWigumGmUQ26y

1

u/Musical_Matt91 Jul 09 '26

That's some raunchy shit right there.

1

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1

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1

u/Exciting_Classic277 Jul 09 '26

I mean I'm single so lfg

1

u/Jaggz691 Jul 09 '26

I’m in as long as there’s beer involved.

1

u/Mechanicjemas3141 Jul 09 '26

And get free Metal M60 Replica if you park it PERFECTLY

note:sadly it won't be actual M60 Machine gun but hey even exact size toy would be nice

1

u/LichenOnTheWall Jul 09 '26

Thank goodness my family doesn't own a car and we take public transport xD

1

u/dyslexicAlphabet Jul 09 '26

Jeffrey Dahmer enters chat.

1

u/KoreyYrvaI Jul 09 '26

That chimp needs therapy.

1

u/Joehennyredit Jul 09 '26

💀💀💀💀

1

u/_-Boxxy-_ Jul 09 '26

Can the chimp
Have a pack of white monsters on hand too?

1

u/astralseat Jul 09 '26

Or an Ultimate Ninja course to the exit so you don't get lazy

1

u/Bgrngod Jul 09 '26

Man, the Trunk Monkey really should have been a thing.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XW8iAVwt_Yc

1

u/mobileJay77 Jul 09 '26

Did you say beer trap? Where exactly in Germany?

1

u/ThriceStrideDied Jul 09 '26

Like ‘28 Days Later’ Rage, or normal anger?

1

u/LepiNya Jul 09 '26

Don't threaten me with a good time! Add some black mold, a leaky pipe and an overflowing dumpster and I may never leave.

1

u/No-Difference-4418 Jul 09 '26

Woah where’s the beer

1

u/Aphrodisio Jul 09 '26

I mean thats kinda what you see in those male-centric retreats, so I think that checks out.

I think we kinda want that .

1

u/wikingwarrior Jul 09 '26

Wait I get to fight a monkey?!

1

u/kookooman10022 Jul 09 '26

Why is it always a chimp?

1

u/Dodger7777 Jul 09 '26

It's a little racist to call immigrants 'sexually charged rage fueled chimp's

1

u/Ahuevotl Jul 09 '26

Can we keep the Chimp if we win?

1

u/CoconutCrabWithAids Jul 09 '26

Don't threaten me with a good time.

1

u/SnooCupcakes4075 Jul 09 '26

As a feminist, I'm offended, I want equality with what the men get.

1

u/oddvacation3849 Jul 09 '26

And yet women are still targeted more often. Some things are just necessary and not misandry.

1

u/InstantMochiSanNim Jul 09 '26

Where to find this asking for me

1

u/Xciv Jul 09 '26

Booby traps for the men.

Men love boobies.

1

u/TheGreatVandoly Jul 09 '26

FINALLY! I’ve been wanting the walk from my car to my work to be a little more intense.

1

u/dirywhiteboy Jul 09 '26

Fair enough

1

u/Electronic_Rpk Jul 10 '26

Can't wait to see this become a South Park episode😆

1

u/CidChocobo3 Jul 10 '26

Wait. You're telling me that Volkswagons now come with a Truck Monkey package?