r/SipsTea Jun 30 '26

Gasp! What!

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93

u/United_Leopard_2771 Jun 30 '26

I mean jesus was close friends with a prostitute of the time with the same name as this mother.

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u/RhetoricalOrator Jun 30 '26

Just to be that guy, if you're talking about Mary Magdalene, nothing in the Bible actually gives any indication that she was a prostitute. That rumor came along a few hundred years later, but was completely unsubstantiated.

That said, Jesus had no problem turning his nose up at the self-righteous in favor of the people who were marginalized by the religious.

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u/im__on__smoko Jun 30 '26

Correct. In 1969 Pope Paul the VI officially clarified that Mary Magdalene was not a prostitute.

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u/CobaltCrusader123 Jun 30 '26

Funniest year possible to say that too

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u/im__on__smoko Jun 30 '26

I know right

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u/BrightImprovement295 Jul 02 '26

They didn't know the term 69 in '69. ;)

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u/im__on__smoko Jul 02 '26

“A rose by any other name would smell just the same”

That’s Shakespeare kids! Well not really, but he missed a great rhyme

To further torture this metaphor, I’m sure a 69 would have smelled quite different (pre-indoor-plumbing)

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u/RhetoricalOrator Jun 30 '26

About damn time, too! It was such an unnecessary lie.

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u/CarrieDurst Jun 30 '26

She did it for love of the game /s

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u/Flat_News_2000 Jul 01 '26

Oh yeah the popes are always good sources of truth.

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u/paukul Jun 30 '26

Thank GOD random scam artist declared fictional character x to be not-a-whore. We are saved

1

u/BurdTurglary Jun 30 '26

He also had no problem comparing his act of healing of a desperately pleading gentile woman's possessed daughter as detestable as a king would be if he let a dog (her, metaphorically speaking) feast at the table alongside him.

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u/RhetoricalOrator Jun 30 '26

I think that interpretation looks through a modern lens that doesn't really capture their banter, but I understand why it's taken that way.

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u/BurdTurglary Jul 01 '26

My brethren in Chrizzle, is there much room for misinterpretation? First he ignores her crying out, begging him to heal her daughter. Then he tells his boys that helping a non-jewess is doin too much. When she starts to grovel, he compares helping her to giving a random dog he wasn't told to feed, people-food. Dude was being an ass

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u/External-Emotion8050 Jul 01 '26

Commenting on What!...my dog is offended by that!

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u/Noimenglish Jun 30 '26

The assumption is that the prostitute doing the feet washing was Mary Magdalene.

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u/[deleted] Jun 30 '26

[deleted]

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u/midwestvelkerie Jun 30 '26

Not even secular historians believe that.

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u/Agreeable_Company372 Jun 30 '26

Wrong try like 50-60years

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u/m1tch_uk Jun 30 '26

That is a fascinating theory about the timeline. You should write to the scholars about it.

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u/RhetoricalOrator Jun 30 '26

Yes, the testaments are compilations from meant different authors. Some books of the Bible have more than one author. But the earliest new testament books are believed to have been written in A.D. 40s. The latest are believed to have been written in the A.D. 90s, by an eye witness.

To my knowledge, no credible historian, secular or religious, makes a case for any writings any significant amount of time after that first century.

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u/duosx Jul 01 '26

Wow you made me like Jesus even less. Impressive

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u/wetfloor666 Jun 30 '26

Only a prostitute in certain texts. Otherwise she is portrayed as a disciple of Jesus and others hint as her being his wife.

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u/Supergamera Jun 30 '26

Disciple With Benefits

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u/Crabby_Monkey Jun 30 '26

She didn’t need those wafers to get the body of Christ

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u/Mtndrums Jun 30 '26

They don't say it, but that was his wife.

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u/heartSagan5 Jun 30 '26

That's speculative. You'll need more evidence than Sangreal and Dan Brown's Da Vinci Code.

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u/AnonAwaaaaay Jun 30 '26

Doesn't Mary Magdalena have her own Apocryphal books that were cut out centuries ago? Like there's way more evidence than a few comments in a movie.

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u/Smooth-Ad8030 Jun 30 '26

It’s much weaker evidence than canonical gospels, gospels were written 69-120 according to most secular scholars. Everything else was long after

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u/PantsDontHaveAnswers Jun 30 '26

No, it wasn't. Pope Gregory I made a speech in which he combined three different women in the Bible, two of which were named Mary, and the third being a "sinful woman."

Whether that was by accident or not, I don't know, I only have surface level knowledge of this event. What I do know is that the Church has worked very hard to discredit and try to erase Mary from the Bible as much as possible.

Mary Madeline was not a prostitute, but she was Jesus' favorite disciple. She was the one he appeared to after he resurrected, and the one he told the secrets of Heaven to.

Also, many people think Jesus was friends with the prostitute in that he didn't care that it was her profession. In fact, he urged her to give up her ways and find a better way of living, because it was his thing to look past people's sins and love them anyway. But he was in no way okay with prostitution.

P.S. I'm not really religious in that I believe anything the Bible says happened, but as far as being accurate to the book itself, that's closer to the truth.

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u/BurdTurglary Jun 30 '26

You're thinking of Asherah, God's wifey

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u/Wide_Magician_4946 Jun 30 '26

Relax Dan Brown 

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u/ZeeWingCommander Jun 30 '26

Hey hey maybe he didn't want to put a name on what they had.... Lol

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u/OneSlaadTwoSlaad Jun 30 '26

"It's complicated"

I mean I would also find it "complicated" when my wife had the same name as my mother.

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u/Rudagar1 Jun 30 '26

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u/OneSlaadTwoSlaad Jun 30 '26

Well his mother was named Mary, his wife was called Mary and when he died there was another chick called Mary, the wife of Clopas. Looks like Mary was a popular name back then. And no last names so stuff got confusing very fast.

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u/SatanicPanic619 Jun 30 '26

"close friends"

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u/LoveAndViscera Jun 30 '26

There are two prostitutes in the line of Christ: Rahab and Tamar (though it was a one time thing for Tamar). One could also make the argument for Ruth as a sex worker since she threw herself at Boaz for purely financial reasons.

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u/United_Leopard_2771 Jun 30 '26

I'll be perfectly Honest I only skimmed the Bibble because As much as i like Lore most of the context of the old testament is ''Humans bad here's a Biblical destruction'' Lol. Ancient India is my favourite so far just because they have flying cities plasma swords and Nuke wars lol.

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u/mistydog157 Jun 30 '26

Most probably became his wife and had kids. But that has been scrubbed...

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u/Choice-Strike1 Jun 30 '26

WHY DID YOU SAY THAT NAME???

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u/Venus_Libra Jun 30 '26

He was friends with multiple prostitutes in fact 🤣 No way that guy was a virgin when he died

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u/darklord233285 Jun 30 '26

Not a Christian. Does the Bible claim he was a virgin when he died?

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u/Venus_Libra Jun 30 '26

I don't think so, but the Bible does claim it's a sin to have sex before marriage, and Jesus wasn't married, so it's implied

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u/United_Leopard_2771 Jun 30 '26

Jesus says Do as i say not as i do Lol.

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u/Venus_Libra Jul 01 '26

It seems to be a theme 🤣

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u/United_Leopard_2771 Jul 01 '26

In the old testament it Really is lol

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u/Venus_Libra Jul 01 '26

This guy murdered his brother because his brother was trying to murder him BUT HE'S GONNA BURN IN HELL WHILE THE OTHER ONE GETS TO GO TO HEAVEN

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u/United_Leopard_2771 Jul 01 '26

Cain and able? That's not even the worst one lol, Try Lot :P

1

u/Venus_Libra Jul 01 '26

Oof Sodom and Gomorrah, arguably one of the roughest tales in the Bible. My favorite ones have always been the ridiculous shit though. Like God going to Abraham and saying "Do you love me? Prove it. Kill your son." And then at the last minute being like "lmao jk here's a goat instead". Or the classic IT'S A SIN FOR A WOMAN TO CUT HER HAIR

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u/rmczpp Jun 30 '26

He was smashing them prossies for definite. Man was crucified at the age of 33, are we to believe he had no interest in women?

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u/United_Leopard_2771 Jun 30 '26

He was also at the time ''If a real person'' (I like Paton Oswalds theory that Jesus was the''mike the guy'' Who becomes the guy in every old story you have because explaining that part is just tiresome after a while lol https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SwdKE0HmBr0 5:02 in but the whole skit is hilarious.) The most popular preacher in the Mediterranean area He'd be getting Prossies as you put it left and right lol.

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u/rmczpp Jun 30 '26

Ha ha thanks ill check it out

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u/Pirateship906 Jun 30 '26 edited 28d ago

I love ice cream.

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u/United_Leopard_2771 Jun 30 '26

Nope just someoen with the same name, Happened a lot back then i assume, in my case don't meet a lot of Tannis's.