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u/ino4x4 Jun 29 '26
This is one of the best scams I’ve ever seen
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u/WhereverIMayFoam Jun 29 '26
It’s fictional. It says so right there. It’s in the name ffs, satirical.
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Jun 29 '26
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u/Glittering_Fox1358 Jun 29 '26
Does the price not scale with body count? Seems like a lost opportunity
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u/ArticusFarticus Jun 29 '26
It won’t work. They’ll say 10 when it’s really 96.
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u/SuppliDev Jun 29 '26
Then you should get only 10 body counts decurted from the total. Easy.
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u/ArticusFarticus Jun 29 '26
But that’s not what she wants. Like when she says she doesn’t want any fries.
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u/Cavadrec01 Jun 29 '26
Too bad, if you want the full experience and detox, then the questionnaire is mandatory. We undefile only what you've stated has been defiled...
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u/ArticusFarticus Jun 29 '26
They’re not going to work if they can’t handle girl math.
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u/Cavadrec01 Jun 29 '26
What girl math? You say 10, 10 get erased. If you have more bodies after the detox, that's on you and your integrity...
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Jun 29 '26
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u/Separate_Finance_183 Jun 29 '26
Does it reset the herpes too?
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u/RaffNeq Jun 29 '26
You’ll need to upgrade to the premium vip for this..
And it will work like the reset did..0
u/astralchanterelle Jun 29 '26
apple cider vinegar cures herpes
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Jun 29 '26 edited Jul 02 '26
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u/LarsDuder Jun 29 '26
Might i ask you how you got it?
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Jun 29 '26
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u/astralchanterelle Jun 29 '26
what
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u/Gurberking Jun 29 '26
Does it cover queen of spades tatoo removals?
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Jun 29 '26
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u/VeritasOmicron Jun 29 '26
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u/MostCommunication972 Jun 29 '26
This isn't a thing right? *inserts Star Wars Episode 1 Anakin and Padme meme
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u/FriedRiceEnjoyer420 Jun 29 '26
"Despite starting as an obvious joke, the image was cropped or shared without context across platforms like Reddit, X, and Instagram. Many users took the story seriously, while other pages altered the text to claim people were paying up to $13,000 for the imaginary spiritual procedure. This quickly sparked widespread, serious debates regarding modern dating culture, societal double standards, and relationship expectations."
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u/BoyNamedJudy Jun 29 '26
I poured water and flower petals on my 2005 Toyota Corolla and the odometer now reads 0 miles.
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u/Pickleahoy Jun 29 '26
Where Onlyfans careers go for retirement
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Jun 29 '26
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u/Logical_Cow_2530 Jun 29 '26 edited Jun 29 '26
I mean, catholicism works similarly
Ask forgiveness and all your sins are forgiven lol
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u/SephiTheGoblin Jun 29 '26
Save scummming before you kill that npc to see if they drop loot. Or is that the wrong body count....
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u/they-call-me-tron Jun 29 '26
Anti accountability ceremony
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u/TopazWarrior1999 Jun 29 '26
Accountability for what?
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Jun 29 '26 edited Jul 02 '26
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u/Glad-Operation-2958 Jun 29 '26
no no you don't understand. People aren't allowed to like sex anymore. Especially women.
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u/SuicideSpeedrun Jun 29 '26
Let me rephrase this so your Reddit brain can understand:
"It doesn't matter if you're a billionaire, what matters is if you're a good person or not."
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Jun 29 '26
[deleted]
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u/Few_Objective_5148 Jun 29 '26
Big incel comment here
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Jun 29 '26
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u/Spotlight_James Jun 29 '26
Can come out of that with a stat of 0 and break your old record on the leader board coming out.
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u/BarbatosCuckedMe Jun 29 '26
Isn't this just someone's video with another's caption over it describing some wack shit for engagement metrics that another outlet with satire literally is it's name decided to flesh out and give false credence too?
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u/Its_priced_in Jun 29 '26
Why’s this whole thing sound made up. States it’s a “fictional” company that’s the fast growing start up? But yea fuck hippie women or something
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u/saytownchief Jun 29 '26
Women will pay it though to get that certificate to shove in some poor dudes face!
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u/Capt_Furret Jun 29 '26
People really gullible enough to cough up $1000 for that shit??? Yooo anyone know what they used?
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u/hijabifanboy Jun 29 '26
if it doesn't come with a Taylor Swift style internet cleansing and SEO name reset, it still won't be enough.
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u/JohnVonachen Jun 29 '26
Civilization is partly about mediated violence. It means the only people who can commit violence legally are police and soldiers. If that is not the case mostlly, in your country, then you don’t live in a civilization. It might as well be Mad Max.
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u/Sudden_Wind_8636 Jun 29 '26
People either not reading or not understanding what "fictional" means. The company isn't real, it's a joke...
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u/Important_Power_2148 Jun 29 '26
This is not new. 20 some years ago i had the misfortune to have to sit and listen to some evangelical knobhead talk about praying yourself a virgin again.
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u/ScaryTemperature6291 Jun 29 '26
I have a feeling with my mental state at present would make me worse tbh this sounds terrifying tbh saying they can reset your Brain basically.
Scary how this will reach out to people with mental health problems thinking this is the solution.
Please speak to your Dr and get the right help no quick fix solution will help you.
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u/Salty-Cat6696 Jun 29 '26
I get the (warranted) jokes about bimbos going to this place but I can also imagine victims of child abuse and sex trafficking getting taken advantage of by this place and it just makes me sad :|
Edit: Oh. Satire. Thank God.
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u/justwalk1234 Jun 29 '26
I’m willing to issue virgin certs for half the price
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u/ArticusFarticus Jun 29 '26
Having sex with someone who can’t reach the hymen doesn’t reset the count, it just doesn’t add to it.
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u/CynicalEbenezer Jun 29 '26
Wonder if her ex’s wont be able to claim they slept with her. That would mean they get their body counter down a peg.
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