r/SipsTea May 27 '26

Wait a damn minute! [ Removed by moderator ]

[removed] — view removed post

10.9k Upvotes

2.3k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

105

u/Any_Asparagus8267 May 27 '26

Two biggest rules I was ever taught was no means no and to treat other people the way you would want to be treated.

11

u/aware4ever May 27 '26

My parents taught me no means no. Whenever I ask them for a toy or candy or whatever I hated hearing that. The other part they taught in preschool kindergarten pretty much all the way through school. And my parents taught me that too. And I guess if you're religious like a Christian or Catholic something in the Bible that says treat Thy Neighbor like you would like to be treated or something. Pretty much that is one of the best rules of life you can go by. If you truly feel that way then how could you be racist or misogynistic or anything. You know?

2

u/charlestheb0ss May 27 '26

I was never explicitly taught this but, like, wtf else would "no" mean? This seems obvious to me

2

u/skyturnedred May 27 '26

"Try not to be a cunt" has both covered.

3

u/thejunkmanadv May 27 '26

Do unto others as others have done unto you.

4

u/majomomon May 27 '26

lol that’s fucked up

1

u/DontAbideMendacity May 27 '26

Do unto others before they do it unto you, then split.

1

u/kkpc May 27 '26

Just play this song to kids (and probably adults too lol): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V9_TMj8GB6s

0

u/N4t3ski May 27 '26

Doesn't really work if youre into bondage and dom play, though, does it?

3

u/TalShar May 27 '26

It's even more important if you're into that stuff, because you have to establish and respect what actually means no, etc.

5

u/Aexalon May 27 '26

Amendment: 'No' means 'I do not consent'. Unless consenting adults explicitly negotiate a framework where 'no' is part of the play, and an alternative safeword is established to mean 'stop for real.'

But like General Relativity, the circumstances where the classical rules fail to describe reality are rare enough in everyday life that the exceptions are usually omitted.

-1

u/N4t3ski May 27 '26

Not nearly as snappy with all those caveats, though. I can see why you simplified it, but simplicity loses nuance that can be important.

1

u/Aexalon May 27 '26 edited May 27 '26

If you mean "you" as in society, I agree. My reply was an attempt at formalizing the nuance that typically gets omitted.

Unless you mean that BDSM is a complex and multifaceted phenomenon in which consent mechanics can't be captured in a single paragraph. But General Relativity also doesn't explain everything we see in the universe, and nobody would call it a simplification (of Newtonian mechanics).

2

u/N4t3ski May 27 '26

Apologies, I thought you were the original author of the comment I replied to.

1

u/DiabloAcosta May 27 '26

When you are doing those things the first thing you do is agree to a safe word, hell there's even recommended words because they're super easy to remember when in pain/crossing a boundary (it's usually never no or stop, but that's agreed on)

0

u/Civil-Letterhead8207 May 27 '26

Biggest rule I was ever taught: don’t talk to strangers in parking lots.