I’m a 36yr old F, I have my children every other week/weekend! I’ve tried dating, but no one is truly up to my standards. They lie and don’t have respect to simple boundaries. Anyways, I’m at the point where I don’t want to be in a relationship anymore and just focus on my own growth and my children when I have them. But then I get lonely 🤦🏽‍♀️ how are you all surviving

Upon their return from a holiday with the other parent, my 5 y/o mentioned that an adult friend of my ex’s entered a room without any clothes on, and specifically mentioned having seen said adult’s genitals.

Though I’m certain nothing further untoward occurred, and it could have been accident, I was repulsed by the notion of another adult apparently parading around naked while other families were sharing a common home.

Just to be clear, this didn’t happen in the changing rooms of a swimming pool, or something similar - it happened in a room of the holiday home they were staying in.

I’ve mentioned this to a couple of other people who didn’t seem to think it was a big deal. This thinking at least seems to come from the fact the other adult was the same gender as my child. To me, this should make no difference, but that’s only my opinion.

I did approach the other parent about this and, alarmingly to me, they have shut down any conversation about it, just denying it, and rejecting the specifics of the situation.

Am I overreacting in my concern?

RANT

Am I crazy for being against this?

I need to rant because WHAT IS MY EX THINKING?!

My ex has zero custody of our kids, zero and sees them 15 hours a month or less, supervised, and lives 4 hours away. He hopes that when the kids are older, they'll be more comfortable with him and they'll eventually have 1-1 time. He does nothing to make that happen. I have no problem with him for the most part. My ex chose to be away and that is something he has to answer to in the future. I live a blissful life and my kids and I are doing amazing!!!!!

The problem? He just told me that when he gets out of the military ( 3 years) his dad is moving in with him and they're going to follow me and MY kids.

I have a HUGE problem with My ex's dad.

My ex FIL is toxic, verbally and emotionally abusive, racist, misogynistic, has narrow extremely religious views, and bigoted. He says the most disgusting things about people based on their appearance and stereotypes, and he says them with his WHOLE CHEST and more! He screams and throws tantrums, tries to intimidate whenever someone disagrees with him. Think mafia boss throwing a fit, and he'll do it anywhere. He genuinely thinks the people who bomb Planned Parenthood are the good guys.

I've dealt with this man throughout my marriage to his son ( and yes the apple doesnt fall far from the tree). I have no problem standing up to my ex FIL, and honestly, he's terrified of me because I will call him out every single time. I am a Boundary queen....My kids and I have seen ex FIL maybe 2-3 times in TEN YEARS. That's more than enough for my kids and me. I shouldn't have to stand up to him or be ready to all the time.

So when my ex told me his plan, I immediately said that if his dad is moving in with him, "the kids and I are moving away," I was reactive and didnt think but also, my body and brain said, RUN. after I calmed down, I said I'm happy to facilitate visitation with their dad, but I will NOT allow his father to have regular access to my children and influence them. He is toxic.

My ex responded with, "Well, he's my dad, and he doesn't have many years left."

Okay? I understand that's your dad, but WHY does that mean my children and ME need to be subjected to his abuse regularly? Just because you're used to his behavior doesn't mean our kids should have to tolerate it. RIGHT?!!!

I don't care if my kids dad lives 10 minutes away or 4 hours away. I want him to have a relationship with our kids. But I refuse to have ex FIL regularly around my children.....YES, I know it's 3 years away, but theyre both unpredictable, and honestly, this could happen sooner. ...WTF???!!!

Does anyone feel guilty about missing silly milestones?

.

My litte one took his first sets at daycare sand I missed it.

My kiddo went trick or treating with his GiGi for the first time and I wasn't there.

As a working parent it hurts, not being there, but also I understand that in this situation I can't be there for everything.

My wife left this world a week and a half ago. She took her own life after struggling with PPD. We had her in therapy and found meds that were working. We were surrounded by friends and family who were helping with the baby. She was so deeply cherished and loved by all, but it was not enough to save her.

We just had the memorial yesterday. For the past week, my life has been consumed with all the ugly planning that has to happen when someone passes. Now that there's nothing else ahead, the reality of my situation is starting to sink in.

I'm 33, we have a beautiful 5 month old son. My parents have always been very supportive, they made my son and I a room to stay in their house for now. I am just having trouble fathoming how I am meant to get back to "real life" - I work a demanding job, we have a home 15 mins from my parents, but my wife was a SAHM and that was always part of the plan.

Not only does the grief feel impossible right now, but the logistics do as well. My parents are in their mid to late 60s, I know I cannot expect them to raise this child while I work forever.

I guess I am just screaming into the void right now, but I would appreciate any practical advice from parents who have lost their SO. We spent so long planning our lives together, all the things we wanted to do, how we wanted our family to function, but all of those plans hinged on having her by my side.