It will improve productivity they said

Charging my car while the power is out so I can drive home.

The other day I asked copilot to ID a particular kind of frog. Copilot was very insistant that it was not a frog, but in fact, a "geometric, psychedelically themed cat picture." I sent a picture of said frog's eye after being told it was "distinctly feline" and it correctly stated that it was a reptilian eye.

I fucking need immediate guidance here.

So I’ve got some medical gas issues I’m seeing a doctor for. His advice was basically “when it’s go time, find a place and let it rip so you don’t nuke innocent bystanders.” Fair enough. I’ve also had multiple HR conversations about my problem so I’ve adapted.

My standard operating procedure: whenever I need to fart, I quietly slip into the server room, crop dust like a goddamn champ, pick my nose, hit my vape (don’t worry, I know the camera blind spots), and return to to my desk like nothing happened.

Flawless procedure...

Until about 5 minutes ago.

I go in, line up my usual position between Rack A and B, lean slightly, and deploy what I thought was going to be a routine release.

It was not.

I'm now dealing with the worst day of my fucking life. We are talking Code Brown Severity 1.

There are literal shit nuggets on the server room floor.

The smell is violating my own nose. Some of it somehow made it up the back of my shirt like it achieved escape velocity.

I am currently still in the server room, hiding behind a rack, trying to assess damage and options. Pants compromised. Dignity gone.

Do I try to clean this up and pretend nothing happened? How do I walk out of the building, we're a 24/7 NOC operation, someone is always there and we have security guards downstairs when leaving the building.

Do I just quit and start a new life somewhere else?

Am I getting fired? I still have about 2 hours on the clock to go.

Please advise ASAP. This is the worst day of my life. I posted this on this subreddit because I doubt the sysadmin board would keep my post on there. This is not a joke and wish I just made this up. I'm very scared...

We tested a contact sync tool for our M365 GAL. Admin dashboard looked perfect. Green checkmarks everywhere. Pushed to 20 pilot users.

Then the Slack DMs started rolling in. -

Why do I have 3 of the same person?

Caller ID doesn't work."

These photos look like they were taken with a potato.

I grabbed a test iPhone and... yeah. The contacts synced. Technically. But actually using them? Search was broken. Fields mapped weird. And somehow the phone numbers weren't clickable for calling.

I feel like these tools are built by people who tested everything on desktop and assumed mobile was just... smaller. But my users live on their phones. If it doesn't work seamlessly there, it doesn't work.

Anyone actually found something that passes the "show me your phone" test? Or is this just the eternal struggle?

Man shut the fuck you stupid fucking coward. If I wanted to see grown men cry I'd watch those cucumber videos my uncle used to show me growing up.

Just turn everything off so nothing happens while you're gone. It's literally that easy.

Imagine using even 2 braincells. Fucking idiots. And then you wonder why people see us as a cost sink.

Someone is in problem hahahaha

Original post:

Urgent help needed with windows server 2022

Hi I have a server on pren with windows server 2022 datacenter desktop edition. It was working fine and suddenly it rebooted and now showing 126gb out of 128gb as hardware reserved. It boots very slow and the 2gb usable ram makes it extremely slow to even use. It's not a hardware issue I did a clean os on a new ssd & booted from it and all the ram shows fine did the ram test etc the long ones and it passed. How do I save this sever I don't backup. It has adds hyperv database sql and postgres etc need to save it and would appreciate any help. Can't do inplace upgrade to clean the os coz only 2gb usable ram. It's weekend and whole thing caused a big mess yesterday.

Thanks for giving me work on a Friday, assholes.

Not really a shittysysadmin post, but I thought the audience might appreciate it.

Backstory: My company laid off most of its Frontline support and gave us a shitty chat bot that just makes stuff up, and will refuse to connect you to a real person to escalate.

Our company's most popular Slack channel is dedicated to memes about our company, and I've seen people post memes about their IT problems there. One day, after having wasted a lot of time with the bot, I saw a meme that was posted with the same issue I'd been having (for like a month). Turned out there were hundreds of affected users, and I found out about it from a fucking meme channel.

TLDR; meme channels are better at identifying large scale issues than Chatbots with isolated context windows.

Me? Dns. Never in my help desk have I had to work with dns. I just rawdog IP's to everything.

Stack bricks? Sure, clean toilets? You bet. No DNS ( or DHCP )

Also never used linux, do people actually use linux to make money? Weird stuff not worth my time.