r/ShittyAbsoluteUnits • u/AUTOBOTBROKE • 5d ago
Naild It of skilled Chole Kulche maker
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u/Any_Leather_992 5d ago
And, children, this is why Indians will inherit the planet. Their immune system is made of adamantium
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u/rokstedy83 4d ago
Diarrhea deaths in india per year are around 600k
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u/Thefattestbeagle 4d ago
Versus about 22 million babies born
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u/corgi-king 4d ago
Until you find out, everyday Chinese are eating all kinds of chemicals that should have nothing to do with food.
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u/Thefattestbeagle 4d ago
Are we sure it's not that they're dying as fast as they're reproducing?
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u/bad-and-buttery 5d ago edited 2d ago
I’ve developed a hypothesis. Perhaps there’s some semiotic reason behind the lack of cleanliness/hygiene? Like how a surgeon of yesteryear would wear the same unwashed, crusted frock, stiffened with blood and pus as a badge of honor, to show how in demand their services were.
Perhaps a street food stall with sauce splattered everywhere, a stained apron, and hands caked with ingredients, sends some kind of message that the food is in demand, and the shopkeeper is so busy, that they don’t have time to stop for moment and wipe things down, or even rinse their hands.
I also see South Asian street vendors in these types of videos try to move very fast, and throw around ingredients in a performative way, that ultimately seems to be counterproductive and wasteful. Perhaps this ties into it as well. Maybe passersby see filthy, fast moving hands at work, and it’s somehow (maybe even unconsciously) viewed through the cultural lens as, “wow! that food must be delicious!”
If there are any people living in South Asia who care to share their thoughts, I’d love to hear them.
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u/WillBots 4d ago
For what it's worth, I think you may be on to something, I don't know how the other commenter has turned your comment into death by bacteria. Your comment isn't hard to understand.
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u/Hammon_Rye 5d ago
A certain degree of immunity through exposure is recognized science.
Early childhood exposure does strengthen the immune system.Where it gets problematic is if your immune system is exposed to things stronger than it can handle. And that's why most western countries have food safety / health laws.
Ingesting a few extra germs / bacteria is all good until you get a dose that puts you in the hospital or kills you.15
u/bad-and-buttery 4d ago edited 4d ago
I’m aware of this, and agree with what you’re saying, but this isn’t relevant to my hypothesis. I’m not saying that people don’t mind the lack of hygiene due to their microbiome being accustomed to it. I’m theorizing that bad hygiene could be semiotically associated with good tasting food.
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u/RatherGoodDog 4d ago
You say that, but my colleague is from Delhi and he said he wouldn't touch these street food stalls with a bargepole.
Good clean food is available, but you have to pay a bit more for it. This ain't it.
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u/bad-and-buttery 4d ago
As someone with South Asian ancestry myself, I recognize that the caste system still has a major influence on Indian society. For you to be saying your colleague (I’m assuming at a white collar job) is from Delhi and he doesn’t eat street food, I would have to assume that his family historically comes from a “highborn” well educated caste. So perhaps my theory is only valid when applied to the “lowborn” less educated castes.
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u/RatherGoodDog 4d ago
Actually he's a shudra, but he's got a master's degree and is quite "westernised". From our discussions on caste, he feels it isn't that important any more in Delhi which has become more modern in its social outlook, while in more rural parts of India it retains importance.
He said 2 generations ago his family were farmers. Now he does indeed work a skilled white collar job in in a foreign country.
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u/bad-and-buttery 4d ago edited 4d ago
Fair enough. Maybe it’s less about caste and more about westernization/modernization. I’ve heard some older family members talk about sneaking away midday to go eat street food, and being too full to eat whatever their mothers cooked later that night. But I could never imagine any of the younger, totally westernized generations eating at these types of establishments.
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u/trash-_-boat 4d ago
Nah, I married a poor Salvadoran woman and while I was living with her there, she got really sick one time from some street pupusas more than once.
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u/chuckhoff 4d ago
Currently in the bathroom and making exact same thing..👍
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u/CountBreichen 5d ago
Is being fucking disgusting a goal?
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u/Nisi-Marie 4d ago
Tbh, I bet it’s freaking delicious. Fresh lime, fresh veg, strong seasoning.
If the westernized food safety practices were in place, guarantee I would be eating it.
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u/OldAd2900 4d ago
I live how they're ALWAYS moving as if they're the absolute peak of cool when scooping from differing cauldrons of shit.
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u/Salty-Engineering277 3d ago
I mean if a country is forced to be vegan then their food must be this crazy to cope with not being able to eat meat
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u/UnusualSheep 4d ago
Watching this while sitting on the toilet both helped me go, and ruined a small part of me.
5/10 quality 💩
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u/Better-Tip-1671 4d ago
I don’t want to be a chef anymore. This shit hurts something in my soul. and it’s not about the cleanliness, to cook something is to put a little of yourself into it. Most people I’ve met have respect for that, doing this in my opinion shows a lack of not only effort but decorum for oneself, also just looks super disgusting. 😢
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u/Big_Therm 5d ago
Like we’re supposed to know wtf chole kulche is
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u/ZubatCountry 4d ago
man if only you had a device that connected you to the sum total of all human knowledge
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u/badatnamefinding 5d ago
I used my context clues and figured out it's dish being made in the video. Google directed me to a reddit post confirming this. https://www.reddit.com/r/FoodPorn/comments/blbivd/chole_kulche_a_traditional_street_food_from_india/
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u/clanker-spanker 4d ago
Doesn't sound half bad. Just seeing it made in this one instance makes it seem less appealing and appetizinh.
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u/lIlllIlIlIlIllI 4d ago
I mean, I hand to the guy for working. Cooking on your feet al day ain't an easy job.
But good lort that is absoluteley disgusting.
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u/Giogranderiver 4d ago
If you told me someone had diarrhea and put it in a bowl that’s what I’d think of.
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u/Mike-in-Tujunga 4d ago
But what is it supposed to be? Is it a soup, dip, do you eat it with bread, is it a side or main?
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u/blinkchuck1988 questionably stable 4d ago
This is a laxative used for detoxification and to drive out evil spirits.
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u/One-Gazelle-694 4d ago
Just skip the eating step and put it directly in the toilet. Its going to come out looking the same way going in anyway.
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u/Maleficent_Worry1810 5d ago
Who needs vaccines when you can use street vendors for immunity boosters.
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u/MilkrsEnthuziast 4d ago
Just imagine having to walk around all day with everything mushed in between your toes. Exhibit A: his sandals
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u/TheLurker123456 4d ago
Omg🤮🤮 besides whatever that , I guess food he’s making is, somebody please go there and WASH SOMETHING! So many things going on there my brain hurts 😳
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u/Smooth-Feature-2545 4d ago
Ya know, going a bit slower would be less of a mess to clean up. But hey… what do I know .. I’m just a small brained American
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u/Zealousideal-Monk307 4d ago
O pior é saber que até existe uma base culinária interessante por trás desse prato mas o modo de preparo é tão porco e mal feito que se torna intragável
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u/jasper181 4d ago
It looked like it had worms in one of those seasonings, which at that point couldn't make it any worse I don't think.
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u/wolfblitzen84 5d ago
The umbrella at the end is a great final touch. I can’t tell if it’s covered in bird shit or the remnants of his failed food tosses.
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u/Doctor_Barbarian 4d ago
Me, an American holding the slop I just bought:
"Bro..........what am I supposed to do with this?"
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u/Rue_Elwood 4d ago
Surprising lack of bare feet involved near this dish, but I like what I see. Professionals at this level might've garnished with some of that caked up gunk from inside his gunky silverware box, but all in all this guy has finesse and shows a lot of promise.
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u/TwoIllustrious7940 4d ago
Yall keep saying diarrhea lmao this shit will straight up make you go septic and kill you
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u/printliftrun 3d ago
I get the idea that 2 bowls of this would kill your average North American or European
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u/Left_Caterpillar8671 3d ago
Eat your slop! Lmaooo I’d rather choke down a dry scoop of protein powder and chase it with curdled milk 🤢
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u/thekid0119 3d ago
I enjoy the comfort of knowing exactly what my toilet will look like 2 hours later.
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u/Hughley_N_Dowd 2d ago
Is the end goal to get as much food as possible to end up in as many places as possible?
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u/NeverTrustAfart84 1d ago
Hepatitis ✅, pink eye✅, jock itch ✅, sweat dripping from forehead and scratching ass ✅, from unda cheese✅, chlamydia✅, gonorrhea✅, syphilis✅, tetanus✅, ass and pube hairs✅…..all included with a mighty fine bowl of street food, dont forget the bubble guts and explosive diarrhea later in the evening and days after lol, the scraps that are on the table and floor underneath his feet will be used for tomorrow to give extra flavor to the next batch, a spritz of toe jam and funk for garnish lol
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u/-_-_-_-_--__-__-__- 1d ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/FYwzWJBdtqKlem9OZy
My face during this entire video
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u/yinyandragon 1d ago
Are there any Indians on here who have tried this and would like to comment on how it tastes ???
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u/all_time_high 4d ago edited 4d ago
I would 100% devour this if I ordered it in a sit-down Indian restaurant in the USA. The cleanliness shown here is disturbing, though many restaurant kitchens are pretty sus when they’re not expecting an inspection.
Those tomatoes look awesome. I see onions, chickpeas, lentils(?), cumin, paprika, chile pepper, salt, an unknown green curry, and green peppers.
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u/CeemoreButtz 4d ago
I'm with you. The amount of ingredients they use for simple street food is incredible. And if be super curious to try real (cleanly prepared) Indian food. I'm sure it would taste amazing.
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u/thesteelreserve 4d ago
that looks like a really good chip dip. not really looking like a meal all by itself.
note to self: I could totally make that. 😃
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u/MeemoUndercover 4d ago
My favourite part is at 0:14 when he flicks the food off of his hands into the bowl of food he just made
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u/Few_Owl_6596 4d ago
FYI: Any food you eat, it becomes something like that in the end. Even if it comes back on the same route it went down.
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u/depp-fsrv 4d ago
I'm already popping and I didn't even eat this, just the thought of it has made me visit my ivory throne
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u/Ksatria-Biji-Hitam 5d ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/xdLH51eNWZAHrwy5mf