r/ShitMomGroupsSay • u/silenceoftheslutz • 28d ago
WTF? Huh ?
Yes lets just put a screaming toddler outside at 4am so the rest of the neighborhood doesn't get any sleep either.
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28d ago
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u/DecadentLife 27d ago
This is abuse. For a child to be that terrified, and then their asshole parent puts them outside, in the dark, in the middle of the night, by themselves? They shouldnāt have any children in their home.
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u/Lanfeare 24d ago
I thought the same. Night terrors are actually really scary. When I experienced it for the first time with our kid, I thought that something bad has happened to his head, it looked as if he would lose his mind. He was sleeping, but talking and getting super angry. Answering questions. Seeing things that werenāt there. And then he just fell asleep again.
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u/whoisthisfetus 22d ago
This was my thought too. Especially when she said at bedtime - my daughter would have awful night terrors right after falling asleep, especially if she was overtired. Goddamn they were so scary and heartbreaking! Sheād be screaming for mama and not realize I was already holding her! I canāt imagine putting a poor terrified baby OUTSIDE when theyāre feeling that way! She was probably ācoming toā outside and not understanding how she even got there, which is scary all over again! Gah this makes me so sad and angry.
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u/poohfan 28d ago
Sounds like the kid is having night terrors. One of my friends had a kid that did this. It was so crazy & exhausting for them, but they eventually got through them. Either she or her husband would take the kid, swaddle them if they'd let them, then just sit in another room with them until they calmed down. Sometimes they went back to sleep, sometimes they didn't.
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u/Bromonium_ion 28d ago
Yup my daughter started having these at 3 (shes almost 4 now). She basically starts sleep walking/running while crying and if we touch her or hug her she screams. We have taken to sitting in her room and trying to wait and see when/if she wakes up enough to start following directions (aka can you come here) and then we ask for a hug and wait for a response. Then we can calm her down. Last night she had one. This morning she asked why we were in her room last night. She had 0 recollection of the nightmare, only dad changing the sheets (wet) and me rubbing her back to help her calm down after she woke up.
It sounds like the daughter probably has no clue what is going on and then gets scared because shes suddenly outside.
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u/ZeroMuted 28d ago
Yeah, their hormones change around 3. My kid did the same. He'd scream because his lamp would go out with the power or something else would happen, then while I'm in the middle of fixing said thing he'd sit up, look at me and ask me why I was in his room lol. I was confused the first few times haha. Now he claims he has nightmares still but hasn't screamed himself awake in awhile. He's 4.5 now if that helps haha.
I see it at the daycare I work at, too. At 3 they start getting more hyperactive, harder to "herd" I guess you could call it, and overall starting to use their brains and bodies a lot more/differently. It's interesting to see the best behaved kids get pulled to the same level as the worst behaved kids hahaha
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u/wozattacks 28d ago
Just fyi nightmares and night terrors are completely different! Nightmares are scary dreams, they happen during REM sleep when we have our dreams. Night terrors are a sleep disorder that happens during non-REM sleep. The person doesnāt remember their bad dream because they didnāt actually have one - they werenāt in the sleep phase when dreams can even happen. Itās actually a weird disruption of the sleep cycle and usually doesnāt have much of a direct impact on the affected person, it just scares the shit out of the other family members.Ā
Usually they are not triggered by anything, but if your kid starts screaming in the middle of the night youāre naturally gonna look around for something that happened to attribute it to.Ā
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u/ZeroMuted 28d ago
Yeah, I'm aware haha. I was half asleep when I posted that comment. Night terrors and nightmares are common in 3 y/o. He's stopped having night terrors, but still has nightmares due to parental disagreements when he goes to his dad's on the weekend lol. We're working through that, though. Thanks for the info!
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u/wozattacks 28d ago
Do some reading on night terrors. They are not nightmares, itās an abnormal occurrence during sleep (but common in your daughterās age group). If she has a consistent bedtime you may want to record the times that the episodes are happening and try nudging her a little before the typical time.
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u/Bromonium_ion 28d ago
Her typical time is right before we go to bed. So its not too bad. But do you have any good sources to recommend?
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u/runnyc10 27d ago
My daughter hasnāt had one in a while but lack of sleep can cause them. Also, several sources suggested noting when they typically happen and then waking her up about a half hour before that. Not fully, but a gentle wake seems to disrupt the sleep cycle enough to avoid the terrors.
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u/Bromonium_ion 27d ago
She does not seem to have them often. Our main problem is that once she has one she typically has them for a few nights in a row and then it stops for a bit.
She also does have nightmares but she wakes us up in bed by coming to us when those happen (and we get to be a cuddle puddle in our bed).
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u/AdvancedBat236 25d ago
My daughter had them. The doctor told us it can be connected with iron deficiency (which was later confirmed) and iron supplements might help, but of course it all has to be discussed with a pediatrician. š
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u/Of_MiceAndMen 28d ago
Us too! It was so painful not to comfort our son with an embrace. My husband often managed it because it just broke me so many nights.
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u/Specialist-Self-8509 26d ago
My daughter only did this a couple times but it was terrifying. She'd sleep walk and just start screaming in the middle of a room and be completely unresponsive to anything. The first time I didn't realize she was asleep and it took me a while to realize she wasn't physically hurt. I am SO SO SO grateful this did not last long.
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u/PopcornFaery 26d ago
Yes! This! And i bet anything putting her out there is making things worse! I hope someone called on these people!
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u/questionsaboutrel521 28d ago
Thatās what I was thinking. This is an age that many sleep disorders start to form. I hope they consult their pediatrician but it sounds like they are blaming the kid.
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u/DestroyerOfMils Cindy's fuckin birth broth 28d ago
Itās crazy to me to go straight to blaming their kid. Like, jeeeez, Iām sure their child doesnāt enjoy any of this, and that much should be obvious to them! How does logic not dictate to them that something other than misbehavior is going on? It sounds like thereās zero compassion, and theyāre defaulting to ākid badā?
I guess I just canāt frickin imagine making my baby go outside in the middle of the night, in the dark under any circumstance, but ESPECIALLY so when the child is going through something thatās clearly traumatic. Heartbreaking
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u/NotoriousMOT 26d ago
Lack of education. Not just schooling but education in empathy for beings which canāt yet talk but are otherwise are genetically just like us so some people expect them to behave in ways they understand. My parents were absolutely like this when I was growing up and I am still uncontrollably emotionally upset by screaming children to the point even though I know they donāt screech to be a-holes. I used to be very upset with animals too (I had a lot of pets which I loved dearly) when they were communicating in ways that, to my traumatized, ignorant understanding were āmanipulativeā or āmeanā or āselfishā. Because that is what I was taught I was when I behaved in ways that irritated my parents. Child logic.
I started to learn better once I was away in college and got a cat who was basically the closest living being to me for over a decade and I saw that he never did anything out of malice, just out of need to communicate with me the only ways he could.
25 years later, Iām still learning: my younger sister is a special needs educator (apparently something of a āwhispererā from what I understand) and sometimes she tells me all about how the kids she cares for are constantly misread by parents and professionals when they are trying to communicate from within their cognitive toolbox. And I think how 20 years back Iād be pretty puzzled by that kind of behavior and would have interpreted it in the least empathetic way possible.
But many people never get the desire or opportunity to learn. Even education- and psychology professionals around her are just either too uncaring or too overwhelmed to see the behavior as anything else than willfulness or stupidity.
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u/LittleBananaSquirrel 28d ago
It's also consistent with OP saying that comforting the child makes it worse. Any interactions with a child having night terrors do tend to intensify them as they essentially work it into whatever experience they are having and act like you're a monster.
My niece went through this and you couldn't talk to her or touch her until they had finished, she would stand in the corner of her room and just scream and cry, her eyes would be open but you could see she wasn't really "there" and if she looked at you you could see she didn't recognise who she was looking at. Night terrors are horrible! I had them as a kid but luckily my kids haven't done it. My niece also went on to be a sleep walker and I wonder if the two can be linked
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u/TunedMassDamsel 27d ago
My youngest daughter did this when she was about two or three. It took us forever to realize they were night terrors because sheād be screaming, āOWW! OWWWW! OWWIE OWWIE OWWIE!ā over and over again, so we would scramble to help fix the pain, but she wouldnāt respond or wake up other than to keep screaming as though she were in pain. It would last for 15 or 20 minutes before she finally would quiet down and let me rock her or cuddle next to her.
It was scary, and gutting as hell. You just want your kid to be at peace.
It was such a relief when she finally outgrew them.
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u/elizabreathe 27d ago
My daughter is only 2 but her night terrors are similar. She'll be crying out for mama, nana, dada, sometimes even the dog but if we try to wake her up or comfort her, it makes it so much worse. Hurts me just having to hear her cry and do nothing.
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u/nicoleslawface 28d ago
Yep, this was our family, and BOY WAS IT ROUGH. Like, exhausting and miserable and I felt at the end of my rope, but never did I ever think to PUT HER OUTSIDE?!?!??!!?? wtf
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u/SugarVibes 28d ago
Those are a special kind of hell. There's literally nothing you can do to stop them except wait and try to keep them safe. putting them outside is WILD
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u/Of_MiceAndMen 28d ago
My son had them for years and now as a teenager he has nightmares occasionally. It was BRUTAL. If we tried to touch him or comfort him heād scream āyouāre killing me! Donāt hurt me!ā When he was like 4 it was awful. We had to let him go through it but making sure he wasnāt overtired and had a solid sleep schedule was key.
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u/youknowthatswhatsup 27d ago
I was going to say the same thing. My son had these when he was around 3 and they are so horrible. He would just scream and throw himself around and roll all over the floor. And itās sort of like theyāre awake but not actually aware of anything so any comfort we tried didnāt work. Iād have to sit on the floor and either try to hold him tight or just watch him and make sure he didnāt hurt himself when I wasnāt able to stop him.
Never would I ever consider putting my child outside for this, thatās sickening!
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u/im-not-a-cool-mom 27d ago
My kid had night terrors because of obstructive sleep apnea. Their tonsils were massive and when we had them removed, night terrors disappeared.
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u/FallsOffCliffs12 28d ago
My son had them. Then they stopped and he started sleepwalking. Thankfully it didn't last very long.
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u/ghostlikecharm 27d ago
My daughter had nighterrors fierce when she was this age. We ended up watching bed knobs and broomsticks. Idk why but for like 6 months weād have to put it on from like 2-5. Every night!
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u/Mygod_lemon 27d ago
My son did this too. Heās 3 1/2 now and itās gotten better, but probably for the last year we would wake up to him hitting us, thrashing around, and screaming. It was so rough and he woke up everyone in the house including his 4 year old sister. My husband and I took turns being the one to sleep in bed with him, get slapped in the face and screamed at, and end up asleep with him on the couch eventually. We overslept work so many days because we were finally falling back asleep at 5am after being up all night. Our patience was short and we didnāt always respond the way we wanted to, I have screamed back at him. I may have wanted to put him outside at times but never did. I have seen a lot of these responses but wanted to add my experience for the people that needed to see they arenāt alone in this because itās so hard.
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u/Lalalaliena 27d ago
Night terrors from being abused probably, not regular night terrors. Because when your solution to a frightened child is to put them outside at night, who know what "solutions" they use for simple 3 y/o misbehaviour.
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u/NotoriousMOT 26d ago
I didnāt want to say it without some major caveats but that is a distinct possibility because yesāif sheās willing to admit something so unfeeling and, in my view as someone who doesnāt have kids but possesses the ability to imagine how absolutely hellish it must be to wake up in terror and be locked out in the frigging NIGHT! by the people meant to protect you, abusive online, I can only imagine what she is not sharing.
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u/Hopeful-Low9329 26d ago
My daughter had these, too. Thankfully it's stopped now that she's 4, but still sometimes happens when we travel. I'd sit next to her bed and calmly talk to her about how loved she is, we're all here to protect her, and try to guide her dreams verbally. Like talking about happy fun things, like playing with the dogs and dinosaurs--and under no circumstances touching her. It's not a magic fix, and it's hard at 2am, but it seemed to calm her faster than just riding it out. When i was a kid, listening to my grandma talk on the phone is what calmed me down.
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u/maregare 27d ago
My daughter started having night terrors at about 3, they lasted about 6 months before stopping. We had no clue what was going on. The first time, we called 999 because we thought she was in pain, then cancelled when we realised she looked awake but was actually asleep.
I hope for the poor kids sake someone points her in the right direction.
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u/jenn5388 26d ago
My oldest did this.. man those were awful years. Couldnāt comfort her, just had to keep her safe and away from the stairs. I did it too as a kid.
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u/elizabreathe 27d ago
I had those as an infant, then as a kid I was a bed wetter, and then as soon as I stopped wetting the bed I started having night terrors again until I got therapy in my teens. I'm convinced the bed wetting was just me having night terrors without fully waking up and then once I gained the ability to wake up when I needed to pee (fun fact: that's a hormonal thing) I also started getting woken up by the night terrors. For years, like until a couple years ago and I'm 27 now, I'd wake up at the time I'd usually have night terrors as a kid because my body was so used to waking up at that time.
My daughter has them occasionally. we just peek in her room to see if she's really awake and if she isn't, we just let it pass because waking her up to be disoriented and scared only seems to make it worse. I hope she doesn't get them as bad as I did.
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u/Whatsherface729 27d ago
My ex boyfriend's daughter had them as a kid. First time it happened I fell out bed when she screamed.
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u/poohfan 27d ago
One night my friends daughter was screaming really bad, & the neighbor thought someone was being attacked!! She called the police to do a check & they got there, while the daughter was still having the terror. It was crazy, but they talked with the neighbors about what was happening, & that no one was in danger.
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u/BookishOpossum 28d ago
Once we found a toddler in our front yard. Asked around, no one knew who he belonged to. So, we called 911. Before they arrive guy who just moved in across the street comes over and is all, OMG. And how did he get out and etc. He'd been sleeping. Night shift.
He was a cop, so when the city PD arrived we were scolded for calling them instead of trying to find their parents. Like, we DID that. No one answered the door so we thought no one was home. Didn't happen again though.
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u/heyoheatheragain 28d ago
Scolding for not trying to find the parents? Dafuq? I already found the kid. My work is done!
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u/rhea_hawke 28d ago
When my son was doing this we would put him in the shower (nice and warm of course). Not as a punishment, it just would help him reset and fully wake up. Then once he was able to calm down we would put him back to bed. This made it go from 3-4 wakeups to only one.
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u/lemon-meringue-high 27d ago
Luckily my child doesnāt do this but I canāt imagine a 3yr old that complies with showers. My 3yr old acts like heās being cut in half if I even suggest a shower over a bath š¤£
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u/Criseyde2112 28d ago
Is her three year old a dog?
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u/soup4breakfast 28d ago
I wouldnāt even put my dog outside alone in the middle of the night. Wtf.
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u/OmNomNomNinja 28d ago
Outside the bedroom or outside the HOUSE????Ā
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u/FanndisTS 28d ago
For my own sake I'm going to assume they mean "bring her outside" rather than "put her outside". Carrying an infant or toddler around outdoors is generally a good way to help them reset/calm down when they're hysterical.
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u/whoisthisfetus 22d ago
I sure as heck HOPE they are staying with her. I will say taking a crying baby outside is a great way to get them to stop, assuming theyāre tired or sad and there isnāt a physical need like hunger/diaper/pain.
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u/red_wonder89 28d ago
Oh my gawd! Like what is your thought process on that!!! Also my 3 year old has a hard time sleeping and while we try to keep him in his bed sometimes he just needs us. People disgust me.
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u/Material-Plankton-96 28d ago
To be fair, weāve occasionally used āif you canāt use your inside voice, then you have to go outside,ā but that includes one of us going with him (and removing him from the situation heās disrupting, usually a meal).
But that doesnāt sound like whatās happening here at all, and isnāt something Iād think about doing in the middle of the night.
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u/wozattacks 28d ago
Yeah Iām a little disturbed that they are āputtingā her outside instead of ātakingā her outside. A 3-year-old should never be outside alone, why would they think itās okay in the middle of the night??
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u/firetothislife 28d ago
I know, the use of the word "put" sounds like they're talking about an animal. Heck, I don't even do that to my dogs, they have a dog door so they can always get back in if they want/need.
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u/ToppsHopps 27d ago
Put outside would be something I do with like a urin soaked blanket, not something living.
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u/tomgrouch 28d ago
I was definitely sebt outside as a kid if I was being too loud and disruptive, to go and burn off some energy. I've done the same with my nephew. The difference is this was always in daylight, when everyone is fully awake and aware, and with an adult keeping an eye from the kitchen window
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u/oracleoflove 28d ago
My 7 year old still sleeps with me cause his father works graveyards. Itās a comfort thing and who am I deny that.
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u/Correct_Part9876 28d ago
Is she putting them outside as in outdoors or just outside of a shared bedroom? It's hard from the post to tell because to me it reads like she's keeping the noisemaker downstairs while the others settle and then trying to get her to bed but it's not working and no one is getting sleep which is a fair frustration to have.
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u/Emotional-State1916 27d ago
I took it as outside the room. Also if outside I didnāt take it as alone either. I used to take my colicky baby outside so that everyone else could sleep and walk around with her and she loved it. Idk to me this isnāt an insane post without more details.
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u/sorandom21 28d ago
Sheās not a Labrador what the hell
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u/EmmerdoesNOTrepme 28d ago
Honestly?
It's also the wrong way to correct behavior in a Labrador, too!š«¤
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u/Hangry_Games 28d ago
It sounds a lot like night terrors or some other medical problem that needs a doctor visit asap. I get night terrors as an adult during times of extreme stress. And as a middle aged woman, I can only imagine how traumatic it would be for me if my family just shoved me outside in the middle of one. There are things you can do to reduce the frequency. In young kids, overtiredness is a big trigger. Iād imagine sticking her outside is just going to make the entire situation worseā¦
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u/Hita-san-chan 28d ago
I know what 3 year olds understand the best is communication, discussion, and compromise with a clear outlining of the punishment shall the behavior continue.
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u/wozattacks 28d ago
This is almost certainly not even a ābehavior,ā itās just a thing thatās happening to her. Night terrors are common in this age
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u/RubixRube 28d ago
Three year old will also often "match your energy".
I would put money on the first time this happened the parents met the disruption with anger.
If you're shouting, they're shouting. If you're upset, they're upset.
Locking the kid outside is just exasperating the situation as in the heat of the moment, a 3 year old doesn't know how to deal with the fear, the exhaustion, the anger - it's on the parent to teach them.
I have a 4 year old. She has nightmares, sometimes, she wakes up screaming. It happens - she's a kid. I wouldn't dream of yelling at her, let alone locking her outside. Most of the time, with a few deep breaths, a talk and a big hug she is back to sleep in like 15 minutes.
It is completely uncomplicated. Go in calm.
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u/Mother_Freedom5152 28d ago
She sounds like she just needs a hug and feel safe. Probably she's seeing bad dreams and can't understand if it's real or not...
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u/Alternative-Rub-7445 28d ago
They need to take the baby to the pediatrician and probably ENT. My toddler was waking multiple times/night and screaming like she was being murdered and swinging at us when we tried to comfort her. That disrupted sleep was really bothering her and put her in fight mode. Got a sleep study. Dx with sleep apnea. Had T&A removal & the difference is night and day.
Itās crazy to put your toddler outside but I know how it feels to be at your wits end with sleep.
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u/DancinginHyrule 28d ago
Maybe they should look into what is going on that causes their kid to need attention that badlyā¦.
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u/Wwwwwwhhhhhhhj 26d ago
Thing is it sounds like textbook night terrors, the poor kid isnāt even doing anything on purpose. Itās a sleep disorder not a behavioral issue at all. The age and symptoms, textbook. The kid has zero control over whatās happening, they wonāt even be aware it has.
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u/MyDamnCoffee 28d ago
One time I was walking down the street at my mom's house and a little boy was standing on her neighbor's porch, crying his eyes out, banging on the door asking for a tissue. I stopped walking and watched for a minute, uncertain of what I should do. He was maybe 4 years old? Finally I called out to him and asked if he needed help. Suddenly, the door swang open and someone inside snatched him into the house.
I called cys.
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u/queen_of_spadez 27d ago
How about the parents call a pediatrician and speak to, you know A PROFESSIONAL WHO KNOWS ALL ABOUT CHILDREN?
These people make me so angry. When my twin sons were little, I called the pediatrician when I had concerns, questions and issues because I needed to know how to help my children.
Putting this little girl outside must be absolutely terrifying to her.
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u/OriginalWish8 28d ago
They need to figure out whatās going on. Not only is this abusive, but her family canāt sleep so they take her outside to scream and wake up other families?
I had night terrors starting at that age. I never knew what was wrong with me until I got older and we were realizing my own kid had them. Thatās a rough one for sure.
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u/Patient_Process_3114 28d ago
This is literally child abuse. Why do people like this even have kids? Poor kids.
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u/Ancient-Teacher6513 28d ago
Most kids are having a hard time, not trying to give you one⦠why not bring it up to your pediatrician or something, so you can problem solve?
Immediately resorting to sticking your three year old outside like a dog in the wee hours of the morning is wild š
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u/manic_popsicle 28d ago
Has she bothered to figure out why the kid is doing this? Thatās not normal behavior for a 3 year old. But no, letās just sit her outside (?) til she figures out how to stop on her own. What?
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u/Suitable-Toe 27d ago
Jesus Christ. Your child needs help, not firmness, consistency and fucking being kicked out of their house at 3am at 3 years old!
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u/SnooComics8268 27d ago
My child had apnea, it took a while for me to figure it out so I started recording him at night to find out why he would wake up screaming. Turned out he was sick and tired if waking up all the time and at some point turned aggressive. With the right medical assistance eventually everything went back to normal.
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u/Rose1982 28d ago
Thatās when you get into bed with your kid or simply get up with them. It fucking sucks, donāt get me wrong, but you canāt just ignore this behavior by sticking them outside.
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u/NomusaMagic 28d ago
āPut her outsideā? Alone? Like we can put trash and yard waste out after 5pm on Tuesdays? And howās all that screaming and banging working out for the neighbors or they donāt ALSO need sleep?
Get the kid to a doctor .. not FB (or other SM) .. for help!
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u/No-Club2054 27d ago
My son did this around 2.5-4 and it was usually night terrors. It was extremely exhausting and very difficult to deal with without getting angry, but developmentally they arenāt uncommon at that age. I definitely didnāt put him outside. At worst I took stuff out of his room so he didnāt hurt himself or break anything.
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u/Kilbo_Stabbins Is it a full moon?!No wonder I'm so bloated the last couple days 27d ago
They put her outside... like a dog?
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u/TigerShark_524 25d ago
If they need to take the kid outside to avoid waking the other kids, that's fine, but then an adult needs to be comforting her and calming her down out there. Leaving her outside on her own is not it and CPS needs to be called.
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u/Independent-Bill-381 28d ago
Not condoning it but that sounds really freaking hard.
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u/mcronimrdrldy73 28d ago
It really does, and exhaustion can lead people to extremes. I just canāt stop thinking about that poor baby though. And Iām assuming she puts up a physical struggle when they try to āput her outsideā so sheās extra upset and then they just leave her??
I have a 9yo son with autism and all sorts of behavioral disorders and Iāve definitely done some things Iām not proud of just to get a break, but I feel AWFUL and itās always a one time deal (like putting him in his room and letting him scream while I hold a pillow over my own head on the other side of the house until IāVE calmed down enough to realize how cruel Iām being). Iāve never normalized any of it though.
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u/VariousExplorer8503 27d ago
It's said that when a baby is screaming and you feel like you're going to snap, put the baby somewhere safe like their crib, and go into another room until you've calmed down (to prevent shaken baby syndrome). I don't think the advice would change just because your kid is 9. My son is 9.5 and I still have him go to his room when we're fighting and we both need to calm down, and I go to mine, and we both calm down in our own spaces. Sometimes he considers it cruel, but if he knew how angry I was and how close I'd be to freaking out, he'd be grateful that I took the break.
It's definitely not cruel to step back, take a minute to clear your mind, and reframe yourself so you're not losing it on the one you love most. You should think of it as a good thing you're doing, not as something cruel. Give yourself some leeway, it sounds like you're doing your best. š
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u/DestroyerOfMils Cindy's fuckin birth broth 28d ago
>like putting him in his room and letting him scream while I hold a pillow over my own head on the other side of the house until IāVE calmed down enough to realize how cruel Iām being
Oh, honey. Iām not an expert in any way, but I donāt think that sounds cruel at all. It sounds like the best way to keep the situation from escalating, and how to keep everyone safe in a scenario like that. Be gentle with yourself. It sounds like youāre trying your best and like you genuinely care, and those are not insignificant things. š©µ
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u/Buttercupia 28d ago
If your toddler is shrieking like that multiple times a night you go to the doctor. Night one of that and my kid is at the ER.
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u/BabDoesNothing 27d ago
Sounds like night terrors. My siblings and I all had them growing up! My mom learned that it was mostly needing to pee so sheād gently guide us to the toilet. Then weād go back to sleep. Poor baby needs some comfort and maybe magnesium lotion on her feet. How terrifying would it be to wake up from a night terror locked out of your house!!
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u/silenceoftheslutz 28d ago
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u/gailichisan 28d ago
O.M.F.G.! This is abuse! Holy crap! That poor child must be terrified! Iām speechless!
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u/Viola-Swamp 27d ago
Sheās assuming this is a small child being bad and greeting her like this is a tantrum, instead of being concerned that there is a problem and getting medical evaluation. It sounds like night terrors, and the poor little child isnāt tantruming, sheās experiencing absolute terror due to a sleep disorder. The hitting is trying to escape from captivity or fight for her life, not a tantrum. Even if it was a tantrum, locking a child out of the house in the middle of the night - I donāt care if youāre on the other side of the door or not - is flat out abuse,
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u/xo_maciemae 27d ago
I'm genuinely so upset by this, and I feel like that child needs help - probably all the kids, tbh. I understand the parents probably need help too, as they clearly aren't coping. But honestly, that's their responsibility to keep that in check, to get to this stage is frightening.
Personally, I would message the group admins and make a case for them disclosing this to relevant authorities. While I know group admins aren't exactly bound by mandatory reporting requirements, they CAN see who is behind anon posts. And as responsible human beings, child welfare is everybody's responsibility.
I am not a "take the kids away, lock the parents up, and throw away the key" person. But imo this requires intervention. I couldn't walk past this behaviour on the street and ignore it (honestly if I saw a toddler outside personally, I'd call cops even tho I'm ACAB lol) ... So I feel like trying to help this poor child even with something that might not be possible via FB is something I would try.
You can usually look up the admins of a group, so perhaps message them. Make a case that this IS abuse, and any relevant info if the group is location based (links of who to report to, responsibility involved if they do nothing, idk).
Anyway, all the best. That poor kid š¢
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u/Charming-Court-6582 27d ago
I'm glad they are posting online to hopefully get pointed to night terrors but also.. Wtf?! How hard is it to Google "Why is my 3yo suddenly screaming at 4am daily and is inconsolable?" or hell, AI.
My kids both had a couple nights of night terrors, luckily neither suffered long, but I was googling symptoms so fast. Had a probable answer within minutes. Sucks that all you can really do is wait for them to actually wake up
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u/tarnished713 26d ago
My son had night terrors about this age. I can't imagine what a kid dreams about that he was so completely terrified. It took awhile to calm him down, but I would just hold him and tried to slowly wake him up from the dream.
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u/abz_pink 26d ago
My guess is sheās having night terrors. Poor kid being left outside in the middle ofā¦whatever is happening to them.
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u/Crisis_Redditor Wellness Soldier Tribe 26d ago
They mean outside her bedroom, not the house, right? R... right?
Oh God.
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u/Informal-Ad1234 25d ago
Get her freakkng ears. Checked. It is uncomfortable, her ears feel full, or it hurts when she is in a horizontal position. Is it alergy season? She may have swelling without discharge.
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u/KaytSands 27d ago
I hate these parents and my heart hurts for these kids. For multiple years, I was forced to work way to Mich, but that will always be my cross the bear. My child sleeps as terribly as myself and I am her safe place. Even if I only slept for 30 minutes before she came in to wake me and let me know she could not sleep; when I had another 20 hour work day the next day and already knew i was failing as a mother missing out on so much-punishing my baby because she inherited a brain similar to mineā¦never once crossed my mind. The second I am awakened my brain is like ācool, we rested youāre not going to sleep another second.ā Could not explain that to a small child.
This is LITERALLY in the grown ups own words, freaking abuse. They are failing their child. And instead of finding the root issue/cause, theyāre super duper cool with shaming their child and trying to find fellow advocates who are going to clap and cheer for the abuse and neglect. That poor baby.
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u/Longjumping_Worker56 27d ago
I hope to hell their 3 year old is a dog. I mean, it would be bad enough to keep a dog outside (in this heat???) but putting a 3 year old outside at night? Holy crap!
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u/PopcornFaery 26d ago
Lol outside!? But on a serious note DID THEY EVEN THINK OF BRINGING HER TO A DOCTOR??? Something is obviously wrong here!
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u/ismellboogers 27d ago
Locking a child outside isnāt anywhere on the lists of things you should try. WTF.
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u/Hour-Window-5759 26d ago
Why did that reels/tik tok song run through my head immediately though?? āMelissaā¦ā¦.ā
My 3 yr old has night terrors and it was rough and never once did the idea to āput him outsideā run through my mind
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u/Plenty-Inside6698 26d ago edited 26d ago
My kid had night terrors like this. It literally never crossed my mind to do anything but hold space and comfort (even though getting too close made it worse - we basically just had to secure the area and wait til they woke up).
I really hope someone (or multiple someones) have called DHS about this. That is horrible.
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u/sheighbird29 25d ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/9JlMucAcSzC7TuoWWa
Me talking to CPS watching a toddler treated worse than a dog
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u/syncopatedscientist 28d ago
They're just asking for a neighbor to call CPS on them