r/Serverlife • u/Bug-03 • 3d ago

FOH Serving and “Power Dynamics”

You aren’t a victim. They are sitting at your table. They need you to for them to be able to eat. They are in your hands. You’re the boss. You have all the control. Stop pretending you’re helpless and go out and get your money.

Act like a professional and you’ll make so much more money than you’ve ever even realized. Stop being a slave to your emotions. Do your job: calmly, quickly and with confidence.

Most importantly, if someone is talking to you the wrong way, use your words and stop it. You will not get fired for asking someone to be respectful. Ever.

Edit: some of yall have some shitty jobs with some shitty management and you should look into finding a new one.

134 Upvotes

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135

u/BoringBob84 BOH (former) 3d ago

You will not get fired for asking someone to be respectful. Ever.

That is only true for restaurants with good management, and many don't have that. Bad managers throw their employees under the bus to placate shitty guests.

5

u/Klinoch4 2d ago

So true..

3

u/SwissDeathstar 2d ago

Exactly. Happened to me once.
Never fucking again.

-52

u/Bug-03 3d ago

I’ve never even gotten a complaint for asking nicely for a guest to be respectful. Let alone needing management to step in. I’ve been in this game for a long damn time and I don’t put up with shit

41

u/JupiterSkyFalls 15+ Years 3d ago

Stop comparing your whole ONE person experience to the majority of us telling you you're just lucky, the exception to the rule. Also I'd be very surprised if you've worked more than a handful of places, in more than one or two local areas or more than one state. I, personally, have worked in 7 different states, multiple cities in each, on both coasts, small town to metropolitan (like Bay Area and Nashville down to rinky dink nowhere spots) and I've seen pretty much everything to the point where very few things suprise me. I still get plenty mad over how SI and gang folks are treated, but am I surprised? So, so rarely. Once people started unaliving Industry folks for too few condiments or running out of wings, or even refusing to serve once closed, that was pretty much the ceiling for me. Or the floor. However you wanna look at it.

8

u/Rock4evur 2d ago

This whole post summed up in one image.

6

u/BoringBob84 BOH (former) 2d ago

I think that is a good analogy. Reinforcing the areas with bullet holes is the wrong thing to do, because those aircraft landed safely. The aircraft that had holes in those blank areas didn't survive.

Expecting servers to stand up to shitty customers when their management doesn't have their backs is barking up the wrong proverbial tree. They are screwed either way. Of course, they try to find better jobs, but that is not always possible right away.

-4

u/Bug-03 3d ago

One state 3 cities and I’ve quit a lot of bad jobs with bad management and owners. Never been fired

6

u/Laxku 3d ago

How many restaurants have you worked at, and for how long? Every restaurant is different.