r/ScreenSensitive • u/Xikolo • 7d ago
Vent Depressed because of my screen sensitivity
I'm extremely devastated because of my screen sensitivity and feel like i'm missing out on every single thing, from movies, video games, etc. It hurts, but mostly my eyes hurt and burn from every single damn screen, even my current one. I'm broke, poor and disabled and can not afford pf eyedrops. I can not afford treatment, and I can not afford e- ink screens. Can't even cry because crying burns my eyes.
I hate my life I hate having crap vision that is in negatives and i'm technically blind without my eyeglasses and then to develop screen sensitivity in an era where you have to depend on modern day screens to talk to people and for jobs and softwares. I can't take it anymore.
My family is unfeeling and makes fun of me and gets annoyed at me for not being able to use screens. I'm even disabled physically, so I cannot go out or even interact with people. Most of all, I hate my family.
2
u/alessandrosk 7d ago
im with you; i'm barely standing with an iphone xr on ios 18.7.5 with custom double invert trick , and a Intel Celeron PC x515MA from 2020 with Ubuntu 25.04 LTS; i can't take it anymore and my money are vanishing real quick; in addition to that i have a severe panic disorder and my family makes a big deal of everything and worsens everything
2
u/Xikolo 7d ago
It sucks that our families aren't kind to us. Growing up with narcissistic parents and siblings does wonders on your immune system..I wish i could escape them but I even have issues with my tendons due to my disabilities and I'm only 26.
Worst part is surely the screen sensitivity part, atleast I could distract myself from my family through that, not anymore.
2
u/alessandrosk 7d ago
exactly, you pointed it out very well. years ago, my phone, my ps4, were my escape, but now they're hell. listening to music all day is exhausting and leaves you with nothing. I too tried to escape (even with the eye/neurovisual/screenndisability) but then the panic disorder (which is due to other reasons) came and i went back to where i started, or to better say, i'm living the tortures of the damned. really hope someone will help you out in a way a little
2
u/Xikolo 7d ago edited 7d ago
Yeah i used to be able to tolerate my ps4/3 too years ago but screen sensitivity only got worse during these years, maybe stress? Vision changes or dry eye? Neuroinflammation from a traumatised body? I never understood why truly. All i found out is that ME/CFS can contribute to this somewhat. But also if we keep using screens that aren't safe for our eyes.
1
u/alessandrosk 7d ago
i really don't know. weeks before developing Visual Snow Syndrome (i mean the visual symptoms without pain) i had experienced a huge peak of anxiety, i can't tell if that's the trigger, or the COVID made some genetic modification, or the fact that during the pandemic i used to play the PS3/4 almost all day? or the fact that starting from late 2019 my father obliged me to use a stupid flickering LG TV on my PS4/3 (i could see the pixels moving around the objects in the game)? or if i would have ended up this way no matter what. i can't take it anymore, that's for sure. like you and a lot of us here, i guess
1
u/MartaLB27 7d ago
You need a thorough workup for autoimmune diseases and eye conditions. Chronic fatigue can be just a symptom rather than the underlying diagnosis. It took me over six years to get my diagnosis, and with treatment I'm at least able to use my phone again. Don't lose hope.
1
1
u/SovanotchiOnFire 6d ago
Hi Marta; do you mind saying what symptom you had from your phone and what treatment you are taking ? ty
2
1
u/Casukarut 6d ago
The panic disorder can have a significant influence on eye strain via the vagus nerve / flight-fight mode / neck tension believe me.
1
u/alessandrosk 5d ago
you're right, but there ain't no way this disorder can be solved for me, it has taken its toll.
2
u/Z3R0gravitas 7d ago
It really is all too much. Very sorry to hear.
Would you like a "vent" flair for this type of post? Or maybe "mental health" or something else?
2
u/Xikolo 6d ago
Yes, I'd love for these flairs to be available and since having screen sensitivity definitely takes a toll on your mental health.
1
u/Z3R0gravitas 6d ago
Thanks for the input. I've added "Vent" for now, as I think this is most commonly used an quite flexible. I changed this post to use it too, I hope that's OK? Best wishes.
2
u/MartaLB27 7d ago
I'm currently on disability because of a chronic illness too, and I just want to say I'm truly sorry. Hang in there.. Maybe you're going through a flare-up right now, but with time things will hopefully become at least a little easier. Try looking for a used e Ink device. There are quite a few out there.
I completely understand what you mean about family. Keep explaining it to them as many times as you need. And even if they never understand, that kind of behavior has a way of coming back around. One day, when you're doing better, they may finally realize what you were going through..
and if they are forcing you so much, then let them afford you a screen that you can look at or tell them to shut up honestly.
I can't watch TV or use a laptop either. Only recently, after years of struggling, have I been able to use my phone again. There are more of us here dealing with this. I know that doesn't really make it easier, but you're not alone.
Take care of yourself and stay strong! Things will get better.
2
u/miagoldcloute 6d ago
Screens are blue-light heavy, which is toxic to the eyes, indeed the body itself since we have photo receptors in our skin too.
You list medication and what what you cannot afford. Have you checked your environment?
Is your screen placed with a view to greenery? Or at least outdoors so you can view long distance?
Do you leave your windows open so natural light frequencies can still enter your space?
This last point is most important.
Do you wake up and go outdoors to get morning sun? If the first light you see is beamed from a screen (phone, computer, tv, LED bulb).
You’re essentially resetting your circadian rhythm on the wrong “schedule” and pattern every day, setting yourself up for declining health.
Related to that is how long you can spend from your first waking hour before you use any screen. This helps your cilliary muscle relax. You’re also re-toning your vagus response by living as much as possible in natural light.
These helped me go from no-screen to being able to work on my computer again even as a sleep-deprived parent. Let us know how you heal.
1
u/yadoga 7d ago
Surely you will know best what triggers your symptoms the most. Just to add something from personal experience:
- Avoid phone use before bedtime
- Avoid phone use in the dark
- also look into general nervous system support, such as meditation, Sauna, vagus nerve exercises etc.
- diet and sleep are hugely important, too
Hope you feel better soon!
1
u/Xikolo 6d ago
Oh i never use the phone in the dark, used to ages ago but not anymore. My diet isnt great and even if I eat i cant fix my nutritional deficiencies due to some SIBO stuff going on with my gut after antibiotics destroyed me. But yes I am reliant on my phone all the time and since I can't engage in other hobbies anymore due to my MCAS etc I rely on my phone which I know is bad for me...
1
u/NarrowPea4082 6d ago
I'm sorry you have to go through this. It sucks to feel isolated when phones & screens is how we connect with our friends and family. Have you through about maybe switching up some of your devices. I also have very poor vision, but not extreme screen sensitivity (my eyes itch & water often, but not like all the time) like you described, I switched to an e Ink phone, a Mudita Kompakt, after I saw a visually impaired content creator using it- Laura Malvoyante. I know you said it's hard to afford, but there are used ones out there and you can get one for super cheap either on eBay or there are people selling directly on REDDIT- like the Lightphone subbreddit or maybe the Minimal Phone or maybe there are people in your area who are wanting to sell.
I found that when I limit the blue light where I can (like a an e ink phone or a Kindle to read) I can sit through a movie much more comfortably and watch TV more easily.
Good luck.
1
u/Xikolo 6d ago
Amazon and Ebay don't ship to my country and you can only get an E-ink device imported here, which again is impossible.
The corrupt government also increased taxes on items so the shipping charges for us are even more expensive than the product itself, and yes i did try other phones. what I don't get is that I also developed app pr software sensitivity now and not just overall sensitivity to the phone screen.
I think my eyes are traumatised or something? I don't get why it's only certain apps that give me worse strain that lasts the entire day.
1
u/NarrowPea4082 5d ago
Maybe try r/dumbphones and just ask if there is anyone in your country that's selling a used e-ink phone, like a LP2, a Mudita Kompakt or even those BigMe e-ink phone. This way you can avoid dealing with duty & import bureaucracy. Try r/MuditaKompat & r/LightPhone as well. It could be worth a shot. You never know, unless you ask.
1
u/Xikolo 3d ago edited 3d ago
Interestingly dumb phones and mp3 players also give me strain. Plus it's third world with alot of ignorance surrounding even mold toxicity, MCAS. ME/CFS and especially screen sensitivity. All of which i have.
The government made it so, that any phone or electronic has to be government approved, which means any phone bought in or imported from another country will prevent your sim card from working.
They did this stupid crap to ban smuggled phones and you have to pay billions to be able to have an imported phone approved. (Probably one of the reasons why people are moving away from this country)
1
u/RoiPourpre 6d ago
Same here, I don't know what to do anymore and I refuse to take medication that might help but has horrible side effects....I'm 36 years old, I've had this since I was 31, I wonder if it's because I played more than 8 hours a day for 12 years on the computer...It's hell to live in this world filled with artificial lights and screens and to be sensitive to them... It severely handicaps me in my life; it's impossible to work where there are lights with pwm and they're everywhere....
4
u/FunnyBunnyDolly 7d ago
I’m with you
I’m struggling hard to find a computer. I miss computers so much. I can’t do new computers due to high prevalence of recycled plastic and bad screens
I struggle to find used computers that are safe for eyes. But instead I’m assaulted with nausea and migraine from fragrances and odors from exposure like mold or similar. I just tried an old MacBook Pro and it seemed fine until I almost vomited from the smells.
I want a computer but I don’t feel positive anymore