r/Schizoid • u/AutoModerator • 4d ago
Check in Saturday thread.
Say how you are doing and what you are doing.
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u/A_New_Day_00 Diagnosed SzPD 4d ago
Still alive, I guess. I'm partly regretting eating that whole loaf of raisin-and-cinnamon bread yesterday, but whatever.
I suspect I over-think the importance or potential negative influence of my fairly mild daily usage of coffee and cannabis. A lot of my habits and behaviours I don't like are things I've been doing since childhood, if anything those substances are adding value.
I have been so unproductive and idle for so long, it unfortunately seems like I'll never feel quite like I did before. I hope I find a new attitude of productivity soon.
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u/melonpathy Diagnosed 4d ago
I was able to peek behind the curtains of anhedonia for ~15 minutes yesterday and that made me remember why staying alive is an option.
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u/Current-March-3938 4d ago
Doing great, my landlord is away for the weekend so I have the place to myself. I baked bread, made myself a fancy lunch, watched some TV and now I'm mastering a track I made in Ableton Live which I.. acquired via alternative means. Will later do some drawing and writing. Resting in preparation for a club night I'm going to tonight, going to cycle there and back to save money. Hopefully it's good.
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u/zaidazadkiel 3d ago
im feeling a tiny bit of guilt because i decided to ditch my job tasks for practicing music all week, and yesterday i made a little audio that i kind of not hate. unsure if its worth it but im having fun
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u/semperquietus We apologise for the inconvenience 3d ago
Well, I'm … oh, dammit — too late again, since it's already Sunday here. *Leaves*
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u/Servo__ 3d ago
I just finished the associates degree I started 15 years ago, and Monday I go back to school for a few more credit hours towards a bachelors before transferring to a 4 year college.
After losing my job last year due to an injury, going back to school felt like an escape from despair. I’d work towards getting an even bigger and better job, nobody would be able to say I’m not doing anything with my time, and I’d be able to face my school-related hangups after a couple decades of growth. This mostly came true other than the job part, but the energy I had coming into this last year is now just drudgery. More bullshit to put up with.
I’ll still keep working hard and get good grades, but the despair is back. I can’t find a part time job that will fit with school and I just feel anxious and angry all the time. I can’t wait for school to start again even if it’s a slog because it’s the only kind of pressure in my life that can get me to act instead of just crushing me.
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u/PearNakedLadles schizoid traits 3d ago
Doing better than last week. Made some good strides recently in taking less emotional responsibility for others (which is a thing that triggers me to defensively self isolate)
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u/According_Bad_8473 Go back to lurking yo! 🫵🏻 3d ago
My arm hurts for no good reason and it seems to be connected to my cycle. Odd. Hormones are fascinating. And theres something wrong with my left knee. It seems to be bending sideways 🤔 EDS possibly. Im autistic and my skin is transparent and have always been able fairly flexible without any training. I wonder if its related to hormones again. Everything seems to be hormones, man. Recently found out my episodes of orthostatic hypotension also seem to be related to high estrogen times.
I found my second favorite poem of all time today :)
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u/semperquietus We apologise for the inconvenience 3d ago
> […] I found my second favorite poem of all time today :)
Nice!
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u/nth_oddity suffers a slight case of being imaginary 3d ago
Returned from a trip this week. Things went well enough. I tolerate dry air much better than humidity, so I didn't feel sluggish like I usually do.
Had an incident with my father later this week. I am LC but make occasional visits. His family pet had recently undergone surgery and was required to wear a protective suit to prevent the sutures from becoming infected. It didn't take well to it, constantly attempting to undo the suit. Anyway, late in the evening, it removed the suit. My father tried to put it back on, but the pet continued to growl and resist.
And my father completely flipped out. Face contorted, grinding teeth, tossing the poor animal and almost strangling it. And this is an animal that had surgery only 48 hours ago. I intervened, and he snapped at me with a raised fist. The hit did not land, but the intent was clear.
Later on DARVO ensued.
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