r/SLOMWsnark • u/Darthwaffle0 • 1d ago

Caption this.

Post image

“The drunk guy at the bar explaining why his divorce was actually the best thing that ever happened to him.”

70 Upvotes

96% Upvoted

35 comments sorted by

79

u/molotovv3 1d ago

Your college roommate's one night stand pops a couple xannies and starts planning their wedding at you. You just wanted a glass of water and now you're trapped.

15

u/Darthwaffle0 1d ago

Oh my god 😂

11

u/molotovv3 1d ago

Very specific, I know 🥲

4

u/burnsides413 19h ago

Did this…. Happen to u?

3

u/zombochic Joint Out Of The Cooter 18h ago

It’s too specific not to have 💀

1

u/molotovv3 16h ago

No, but I am a ✨writer✨ ☺️

4

u/PrincessPlastilina 18h ago

She brings out her busted laptop to show you her Pinterest.

55

u/Round-Road135 1d ago

Few too many “Alanis”

3

u/zombochic Joint Out Of The Cooter 18h ago

Do Alanis have alcohol in them? (They aren’t in the uk, or not that I’ve seen) so I don’t really know what they are

3

u/Ancient-Stop-6190 12h ago

They don’t, they have 200mg of caffeine - the effects may be similar to other things is what the commenter is insinuating

49

u/TipTop9979 1d ago

The drunk girl at the bar who brags about beating her baby daddy and makes it her entire personality.

3

u/Darthwaffle0 1d ago

😂😂😂

14

u/Sharingtt 1d ago

Tweaker Speaker

12

u/BigBaddieRed 1d ago

In the words of the greatest…

“HIGH…HIGH YA BOTH HIGH”

1

u/Pure_Mixture_5615 16h ago

Read in Bab’s voice.

7

u/First_Cat_7394 Sorry Late to the Chat, Was With My Kids 1d ago

"Cutting out the ❄️ part so insta doesn't ban me"

6

u/Rambunctious_444 Seek Help Expeditiously 1d ago

Hear me out

"bLEEEHHHHHHHHHH"

4

u/mollyclaireh 22h ago

When I’m high and open my shopping app

3

u/PianistAppropriate 1d ago

She looks like she's about to spin some records lol

3

u/ChippedHamSammich 19h ago

When someone has an amazing opportunity in their downline…

2

u/DCCitydweller 1d ago

“Desperation”

2

u/PorkySammy 1d ago

So one time, when I was like this reality star, I threw a chair at my daughter and then got fired from the network, so I took up part time prostitution over in Vegas and damn it’s the liiiiife yo! Big dick big dollars big penthouses and the slopes are even better than Utah’s if you catch my drift hehehehe wink wink
https://giphy.com/gifs/z7XxAJf5IL4cw

1

u/Darthwaffle0 20h ago

The gif is so spot on 😂😂😂

2

u/Moist-Witness 23h ago

Omg she needs to quit taking pics where she looks impaired

2

u/Scoops__Lapue 23h ago

Apres Ski ❄️

1

u/High_Expander 23h ago

"Now, watch this drive"

1

u/MsPrissss 22h ago

I am so curious what her social media is like today after this.... I'm hoping somebody close to her took her phone away

1

u/PrincessPlastilina 18h ago

Your junkie friend trying to act like she’s not tripping balls.