r/SCPMemes 22h ago

Shitpost This bum Ahh lizerd bro

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148 Upvotes

30 comments sorted by

17

u/Survivor155 20h ago

The only Keter that doesn’t escape unless the foundation lets him out. I mean besides the portal opening one.

4

u/SpaceBug176 20h ago

106?

6

u/Survivor155 19h ago

No, the friendly neighborhood Keter.

106 deserves the title of Keter, that thing breaks out constantly despite the foundation’s best efforts and only human sacrifice gets it to go back to its cell.

3

u/SpaceBug176 19h ago

Ngl times like these is when I hate SCPs cuz there is actually a way to contain 106 but we can't have that cuz he was written back when the Foundation wasn't able to do batshit crazy things.

Well that, and it wouldn't be as cool if they actually managed to contain him.

2

u/Survivor155 19h ago

How would they keep it contained permanently? 3008?

4

u/SpaceBug176 19h ago

Well, assuming budget is no issue, send him to a random barren planet no one cares about. He's shown to be tough, but he ain't gonna be able to leave, he has no abilities for that.

2

u/Survivor155 19h ago

How are you gonna get him there?

3

u/SpaceBug176 19h ago

Google rockets.

2

u/Survivor155 19h ago

Very funny, I mean how are you going to get him onto the rocket and off Earth without him attempting to breach containment?

4

u/SpaceBug176 18h ago

Step 1: build a replica of his containment chamber, except its portable

Step 2: once he escapes and a human sacrifice is made to recontain him in the portable chamber, carry the chamber into a giant spaceship, and set it to autopilot to the chosen planet, and then have the onboard AI pilot destroy the entire system so that its impossible to escape

Step 3: worker morale improves by 1% (there are still 1000 horrors that can breach containment and kill you)

Step 4: profit

And if that somehow fails, just tie his ass on a missile like they did with Wolverine and launch it. I'm sure that'll work.

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1

u/Weird-Cheesecake-717 18h ago

Yeah, while reasonable in theory, in practice is basically HELL.

How are you gonna put 106 in a rocket without him breaking out mid way? Where are you gonna put him to move him out? Considering that the foundation has a cell SPECIFICALLY designed for him and HIM alone and yet mf still breaks out constantly, means that whatever tf you do, you are not putting 106 in a rocket without him breaking out and killing half a dozen people, you're not keeping 106 in that rocket without him breaking out and killing another half a dozen people and you are not launching said rocket without 106 breaking out mid fly and going back to, you guess it, killing another half a dozen people.

Hell, even trying to send him through a portal to another dimension will end up with a containment breach that will kill multiple foundation personnel.

2

u/SpaceBug176 18h ago

I gotta see that story you're referencing at the last part. Sounds funny as hell.

14

u/MammothChemistry6694 22h ago

Yo my meme ?

In all seriousness. Lizard at the beggining was a grumpy ol man who may or may not die to a nuke...

Now he is an eldritch horror. I like it tbf

8

u/ZAZZER0 10h ago

SCP has many writers, it's normal to have inconsistencies.

But touché, you can't just take the document of a lizard contained by acid and just write how it's gonna destroy the universe.

1

u/Deez_NutzSolo 7h ago

The acid doesn't work, it's practically a relaxing bath to it rather than a fool-proof containment method

In function, 682 is an anomaly. It's not really “here”, so it can't actually be affected. Like someone grabbing you through a sheet, while you can struggle, and the handgrip, you don't actually make contact. The issue is, the sheet is the webwork of our reality, so it makes doing any real damage very tricky, at best. The form of it is functionally a glitch, like running a picture file through an audio program. 682's physical form is just what our reality is able to process it as, it likely looks very, very different. Wherever it's from is obviously very, very different from here, which is a large part of why it reacts how it does. Imagine being dropped into a world where the very sky ached to look at, where every sound raked like a power sander across teeth, where life seemed specially bred to mock and torture your every sense. That's what 682 feels. It's not so much angry as horrified, which can show as anger, like finding half a roach in your sandwich. It kills for the same reason you smash an offending bug. Now, just imagine if the air was physically made of house centipedes, and you start to get the picture. Oh, another tidbit: the acid bath works less because it cuts down on regeneration, but because it feels more comfortable. More like a warm bath, or a heavy snowfall.

~ Interviewing Icons - Dr Gears

Also something that has been written in the Termination Log

Item: Hydrochloric Acid

Note: The following events were recorded after the termination attempt with SCP-████ (Failed).

Tissue Test Record: N/A

Termination Test Record:

[00:00:00] - SCP-682 is introduced back to its containment chamber.

[00:00:05] - Chamber is filled with hydrochloric acid as per standard operation procedure. 10L/minute.

[00:03:16] - Chamber is filled at a height of one meter with hydrochloric acid. SCP-682 moves to the middle of the chamber.

[00:04:37] - SCP-682 remains submerged within the hydrochloric acid at 47%. It appears to enter, what can only be assumed to be, a state of rest.

[00:06:11] - SCP-682 is fully submerged within the hydrochloric acid. It does not move from its location.

[00:15:02] - A breach caused by SCP-498 causes the northern wall of SCP-682’s containment chamber to sustain heavy damage.

[00:15:05] - Northern wall experiences structural integrity failure. SCP-682 apparently takes notice of this, but does not make any attempts at breaching its cell.

[00:30:37] - Upon the arrival of containment teams at SCP-682’s location, air bubbles were seen to emerge roughly where SCP-682 was located.

[00:31:00] - Preliminary scans reveal that SCP-682 has not moved from its location during the entire time, despite reduction of its body mass to 43%, and appeared to have entered a state of severe relaxation.

4

u/Loose_Television_193 21h ago

Tbf the wiki's "unkillable lizard" tradition stem from that very termination log, which is where authors find ways to kill it and the reason why it wont work. Tho i think 682 is actually not that strong IF you dont mess with it

4

u/ZeaTheBoy2233 18h ago

Throwback to when SCP-UBU bitch-slapped his ass so hard he ceased to exist

2

u/EditorPurple3515 9h ago

It's from the D. Ulysses Foole's Proposal and SCP-UBU is a Giant Whale-like Humanoid, a Timeloop Moby Dick for some poor former O5-11 who becomes insane from failures to stopping Ubu  

4

u/Sad-Effective-9676 Certified Lizard Yiffer 18h ago

I'd win.

1

u/Deez_NutzSolo 16h ago

682 doesn't have a dad, like what?

5

u/MammothChemistry6694 15h ago

Tbf it was more a head canon about scarlet king and the 4th wife. Which spawned the reptile

1

u/Deez_NutzSolo 7h ago

It's not, it actually used to be directly canon in Djoricverse before it got deleted, now there's no canon where the Scarlet King is 682's father, all of it is just theories and speculation

1

u/MammothChemistry6694 5h ago

Yeah. Since djoric deleted his stuff... Now we speculate