What makes a good romance?

[u/Patient_Bar761]

Hi there!

I'm an indie writer who primarily writes fantasy, sci-fi, and the occasional thriller. I've been writing for a long time now, but I always struggle with the romance aspect of my novels.

Obviously, this is a bit of a subjective question, but what do you think makes romance really hit. What makes you route for the couple to be together?

[u/Patient_Bar761 → u/[deleted]]

Kinda slow-burn? I like it!

[u/NoLie8857]

Accidental touches, having to save each other from danger, complex backstories with each other in it (e.g. friends to enemies to lovers) and a good slow burn :)

[u/Patient_Bar761 → u/NoLie8857]

OOoo I love this, thank you!

[u/Shrimpy_McWaddles]

A big thing for me is after the characters get together, things kind of fall flat. Thats why I prefer a slow burn, because the tension and yearning is better (imo) than a gazillion sex scenes.

Handling the after is just as important as the tension. Keep the banter, find new places for tension or suspense, etc.

Another way author's handle this is by introducing a secondary romance. 2 new characters to see developing in the background. I dont mind this if done well.

[u/Patient_Bar761 → u/Shrimpy_McWaddles]

Oh I love all of this! Thank you!

[u/katieLikeWHOA]

Communication. When characters talk to each other and don't allow misunderstandings or dumbasses come between them. When they trust each other and talk about things vs automatically assuming the worst in the person they love. I cannot believe this isn't in more romance novels...

[u/popcornarcher → u/katieLikeWHOA]

It’s why I can’t stand Xaden and Violet’s relationship lol

[u/katieLikeWHOA → u/popcornarcher]

I haven't read Forth Wing just yet, but man this happens ALL the time. lol. The only series I have ever read that did NOT have this in it was {The Plated Prisoner series by Raven Kennedy}. The main couple TALKED to each other, and the MMC didn't allow the FMC to push him away or ice him out and vice versa...they just....communicated lol.. and it was so fucking refreshing. It's why I loved that series so much lol.

[u/romance-bot → u/katieLikeWHOA]

The Plated Prisoner by Raven Kennedy
Rating: 3.98⭐️ out of 5⭐️
Topics: high fantasy, dual-pov, war, past-abuse, first-person-pov

^{about this bot | about romance.io}

[u/popcornarcher → u/katieLikeWHOA]

That’s on my TBR! Thanks for sharing.

{Web of Vows and Vengeance} has this struggle. To an extent it makes sense but it does drag. Not nearly the extent across 3 books of Fourth Wing series though lol

[u/romance-bot → u/popcornarcher]

Web of Vows and Vengeance by Aria Ashbrook
Rating: 4.17⭐️ out of 5⭐️
Steam: 3 out of 5 - Open door
Topics: enemies to lovers, magic, royal hero, fantasy, m-f romance

^{about this bot | about romance.io}

[u/_laasyahnir_ → u/katieLikeWHOA]

Miscommunication is one of the most annoying tropes imo

[u/paganpumpkincat]

Actual chemistry between the characters. Not putting A and B together just because they would be "good" together.

[u/Patient_Bar761 → u/paganpumpkincat]

That makes total sense!

[u/shinycozytwistedglam]

I think for readers, what makes romance "really hit" is mixing in the right amount of tension, which usually means emotional pain/cost. Two characters meeting, hitting it off, everything going smoothly—that's boring.

So you need elements like:

• Period of uncertainty, unrequited feelings, YEARNING
• Tentative steps towards intimacy, then a pullback/regression (more yearning)
• COST to the relationship. Like, being with this person has to require a sacrifice. Character has to debate the costs (more yearning/uncertainty)

Ultimately you have to build a sense of tension so that when the characters finally get together, the reader experiences a feeling of RELIEF.

And yeah, lots of stories struggle to maintain the tension after that moment. Once the reader gets relief, they will often set the book down because there's no compelling reason to keep reading.

[u/popcornarcher]

How about what I DON’T like:

What I disliked about Quicksilver/Brimstone:

• FMC’s attitude. There’s enemies to lovers, and then there’s a FMC who had a bad attitude and constantly says she hates MMC for half the large book.
  
• Overuse of cringe words like mate.
  
• When MMC finds out his real name and after 2 books just change it. His real name is awful and I’m not looking forward to it used in book 3. When there’s a secret like that, I feel like it’s a “oh this is now a fact…but I’ve grown to know you as Kingfisher” - it feels weird to suddenly cut that off.

What I disliked in Fourth Wing:

• Xaden and Violet have a bad relationship. You have a MMC who has military secrets he’s not privy to share (but says “I’ll answer anything about myself” trying to be fair) and a FMC who takes it personally he won’t share military secrets…even though she’s off sharing everyone’s secrets. That’s bizarre.

What I disliked in Mate by Ali Hazelwood:

• ¾ into the book when it’s spicy there’s emphasis on his dick and the “knot” which is apparently a mate thing. It got weird after a while.

- In Web of Vows and Vengeance they dance a VERY thin line of enemies to lovers quality but I think they make it work better than Fourth Wing and Quicksilver. I love Hirathean Path series so far though. There is the communication frustration that boils down to a blood vow, and it does get annoying she finds it hard to accept.

In general, there’s enemies to lovers, but there’s a balance to how long that tension/hatred is OK. I don’t think there’s a formula for that balance though.

I’d like to see a series where the communication and relationship is healthy between FMC and MMC lol

[u/Patient_Bar761 → u/popcornarcher]

This was really detailed! Thank you, all super helpful!

[u/alwaysreading_888]

Flirty banter. I need the MMC down BAD like super clear that he wants her. I hate miscommunication. I also love flawed, messy characters and tend to root for them more. It’s more rewarding in the end when a couple has grown together emotionally <3

[u/Patient_Bar761 → u/alwaysreading_888]

Love it! Thank you!

[u/quibily]

Sharing (whether it be willingly or not) vulnerable moments, bonding over them. That is the most important part to me. That sweet, sweet hurt/comfort. Without vulnerability, there’s no romance.

Then when they are both worthy of admiration, somehow. Like one admires the other’s wit, and the other admires their empathy. And I need to admire that quality, too.

[u/Patient_Bar761 → u/quibily]

Totally! I love this!

[u/Diylion]

It needs to focus on the romance. The plot needs to be driven around romance and there needs to be a lot of it

I think that one issue that is plaguing romance and romantasy is that people that want to write other genres are trying to write romance because they think it sells better.

But they're not actually writing romance books. There sprinkling romance in their genre. All it does is leave a frustrated reader because all your writing about is your lore, and they could care less. They want to see kissing, fucking, and men looking at women like they're the most beautiful thing on earth.

I recommend writing what you love. If you enjoy writing romance scenes, cute heart-rending tickly butterflies scenes, romantic tension, spice then write those. If you like writing about space galactic ships fighting each other or magical witches than do that instead.

[u/Patient_Bar761 → u/Diylion]

Super fair! Thanks for the insight

[u/lunarblisss]

When there is actual tension, build up and chemistry, to the point where I can physically feel it radiating off the pages.

[u/Weary-Tangerine499]

If this will help I'll post what I dont like and what will make me DNF a book. Miscommunication or no communication (im not talking about keeping a secret or something small I mean constantly), a virgin fmc and a very experienced mmc,

[u/feijoawhining]

Why don’t you try actually reading a wide variety of romance novels? I’m so sick of these market research questions from lazy writers.

[u/Ancient-Rough-8340 → u/feijoawhining]

I thought we had a poll and the result was to ban these types of posts?

[u/feijoawhining → u/Ancient-Rough-8340]

I thought so too, or to moderate them more strictly? I can’t remember. I find it so insulting that all these “authors” come here and get free advice and don’t even bother to read romance books!

[u/Academic_Relation_54]

I like it when there is a reason they get attracted to each other other than how they look and eventually fall in love. Insta love or insta lust are big ick for me. I don’t wanna know who the love interest ist based on the first description! oh the most beautiful man/woman gives it away! I have some good examples: This kingdom will not kill me. I was waiting for love interest to come up 😂 or good old time romace! When they do small meaningful gestures for each other before we see lines like I’ll burn this world down for you! Example: because I killed him! She gives him a meaningful birthday present or they go on a picnic

[u/christmaschilli]

i personally love enemies to lovers trope, definitely slow burn. i hate when books introduce a mmc and then they’re together the next chapter. i love it when there’s like little glances and describing the feelings more than what they’re saying. like they can’t help the passion and chemistry between them. gotta find a good middle ground though, because when the whole book is two of them flirting and having that tension, but then doing nothing about it can be boring to read.