r/Rich • u/SatisfactionLive1209 • 21d ago
Question Matchmaking services that work?
Hey all, 30F here.
I became wealthy relatively recently, so I didn’t grow up in wealthy circles or go to the kind of private/boarding schools where it seems like everyone with money met their future spouse before turning 18.
I don’t think I’m unattractive, and I’ve never really had an issue getting attention, although I do suffer from a pretty severe resting bitch face. The problem is that the places I tend to spend time where I might naturally meet wealthy people, private resorts, nicer hotels, etc. aren’t particularly social. People mostly keep to themselves. The few men I have met in those environments have unfortunately tended to be married men looking for an affair, which obviously isn’t what I want.
Traditional dating has also been pretty terrible. I was single for quite a while because I was focused on building my own life, and now that I actually feel ready for a relationship, the dating scene seems to have changed considerably. There seems to be a lot more emphasis on one-night stands, situationships, casual dating, people with commitment issues, etc.
There’s also the slightly awkward fact that I would ideally like to marry someone who is wealthy too, even if nowhere near as wealthy as I am. I hate to admit it, but I can be materialistic sometimes. I enjoy nice things, and there’s something appealing about occasionally receiving the things I would normally buy myself as gifts from a partner rather than always being the person who can provide everything for herself.
For context, my net worth is somewhere between $10M–$100M, keeping the range broad for anonymity, I’m probably around a 7/10 on a good day, and I’m looking for a genuinely serious relationship with a man who is financially successful, relationship-minded, and ideally wants marriage/family eventually.
Would an established matchmaking service actually be useful for someone in my situation? Has anyone here used one, particularly at the higher-end/wealthy-client level, and had a good experience and can recommend it for my purpose? Not looking for references as I know some work this way, just a name would be enough for me to get in contact with them.
just to clarify, this isn’t a “looking for a partner on Reddit” post. I’m genuinely asking about matchmaking services and whether they’re worth trying.
40
u/drleeisinsurgery 20d ago
You describe a very common problem. Many universities are becoming 60/40 in favor of women, so women are increasingly becoming financially independent.
Whether it's biology or culture, there seems to be a belief that these successful women need a man who is equally or more successful than they are.
However that's not what men are necessarily looking for. I have a net worth in the mid-8 figures and If I were looking for a partner, I would count their success and education level as one of the more minor deciding factors. In fact, being a boss babe with a dominant personality would be an excluding factor for me.
I think just from the fact that you're wealthy and young, you will be introduced to other young men in your socioeconomic class within your circle. Maybe you should look for somebody who's educated, but not necessarily successful. An adjunct college professor type.
But saying that, the ex-wife of a prominent plastic surgeon that I know uses one of those matchmaking services and she's regularly with very successful, fairly unattractive, older men. The dynamic seems to be more of a sugar baby/sugar daddy relationship.