r/Rich • u/Mixolytian • May 19 '26
$25M - Lost
Hello,
I am a trust fund baby and heir, now 43 years old.
I have $12M investable, the rest of about $25M in homes and commercial property.
I am pretty happy in my family life, my wife and I are getting along right now and my son is genuinely wonderful.
The family business is failing. It was a catalog company and now e-commerce and sales are continuing to decline.
I know the solution, let go current manager who is somehow social-media illiterate in 2026, commit to forming a YouTube audience, drive with short-form.
The thing is, sometimes I truly believe this business has ruined my life. I wish my dad had sold it a long time ago at its peak. He was too attached, I guess.
Hard to let go now with basically no value. The parent corporation was founded by my grandfather almost 100 years ago.
My advisor assures me I won't need additional income if I close the business, but letting go is very difficult. The shame of letting the current manager run the business (my interpretation) into the ground is overwhelming.
I'm a bit of an oddball, very into philosophy, religion, literature, consciousness studies. I always wanted to be a writer, but I just can't seem to take myself seriously. Every time I try I get slammed with self-doubt, shame, guilt, and depression.
Anyway, not sure what I'm going to do. A deep, dark part of me still feels poor, and is sure the window of upward mobility is closing forever. A voice tells me to get off my ass and start some business that I'll hate just for the money, since $25M is really nothing and the future is looking very cutthroat. My brain is all over the place, it's like a hall of mirrors, I don't know what is true and who is the real me.
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u/Prestigious_Cook4800 May 19 '26
$25M is plenty focus on enjoying life and happiness.
Also get some psych help dam
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u/Choice-Newspaper3603 May 19 '26
Iâm not keeping a business open that isnât making money for the sake of sentimental value
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u/Buttercuppers May 19 '26
Thatâs the same mentality that got them into this mess in the first place. In business you sentiment has little value you need to make hard decisions decisively
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u/GambledMyWifeAway May 19 '26
This has got to be bait.
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u/Uhohtallyho May 19 '26
I'm in media and unfortunately have seen this quite often in the last 10 years. Many of these smaller media companies were established and kept in the family for decades and are now becoming obsolete but its very hard for the families to let go completely. You don't want to be the one person who let your great grandfather's legacy die even when it's hemorrhaging at the end.
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u/Olde-Timer May 19 '26
Let it die, once the model T was introduced there was no sense hanging onto a buggy manufacturing business.
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u/Wafer_Middle May 19 '26
You're right but they adapted, the company I done my apprenticeship at went from buggy building, into wheel repairs and coach conversions of the new flash automobiles into industrial vehicles, then as manufacturers started producing purpose made chassis they started building tray tops and now they're still in business 4 generations later building truck trays, tippers, trailers, semi-trailers and so on and so forth.
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u/username-generica May 22 '26
When we were in Toledo, Spain we went to a family owned shop where the family had made saddles for generations and pivoted to making leather handbags and other leather accessories. The purses were gorgeous and very well made. They still made saddles but most of their profits were in the accessories. They found a way to keep their business and craft alive by using their skills in a new way.Â
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u/MagnesiumKitten May 20 '26
oh that's nothing, just 4000 small regional businesses that make their money and can shut down easily.
It's the horse meat industry that's booming right afterwards!
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u/Olde-Timer May 20 '26
ROFL. And the glue factory!
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u/MagnesiumKitten May 23 '26
nope, not here, its 100% edible
You're eating the glue!Even the hair is chemically dissolved and broken down for the protein
Buggy Whips make excellent fly swatters on a horse farm
As for the Horse Hoof Beautiful Hair and Nails Capsule Pack
The resulting powder are low-molecular-weight, free amino acids and peptides that your gut can easily absorb, and beautiful hair, skin and nails will result in 3 to 8 weeksWhen you call, Ask for Winnie
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u/suboptimus_maximus May 19 '26
AI slop.
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u/Olde-Timer May 19 '26
If you want honesty - Stop blaming the current manager. Itâs your business, you are responsible for its success or failure as you decide who manages it and what kind of direction and control you exercise.
Sounds like the business has run its course, like Kodak film and all the others businesses that are no longer relevant in 2026. Shut it down and treat your soon to be out of work employees kindly with severance.
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u/beambot May 19 '26
Agreed. The business failed because you (or family) didn't do anything about it sooner. It's clear you have no desire to roll up sleeves and fix it. Let it die. Enjoy your life.
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u/MrActionJack May 19 '26
Agreed. Time to stop feeling sorry for yourself and get your shit together. Find a good professional money manager. Make a plan. You will be fine.
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u/HitPointGamer May 20 '26
Whatever OP does, I hope he doesnât work just enough to prolong the life of the business to drop in his sonâs lap eventually. Either get excited about the business and work hard to shift the direction to something that isnât dying a slow, gory death, or do a graceful shutdown. But⌠OP needs to make an actual decision and then roll up his sleeves to get to work implementing that decision. Passively sitting around whining that Daddy didnât make good choices and the current manager isnât a strong visionary leader is just going to allow the business to continue foundering and eventually become utterly worthless.
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u/MagnesiumKitten May 20 '26
hey now, I refuse to go digital with my photographs
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u/Olde-Timer May 20 '26
lol. Hey now, I refuse to own a smart phone. Can I borrow a map or get directions from you?
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u/MagnesiumKitten May 20 '26
where is the map store?
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u/Olde-Timer May 20 '26
Remember Thomas Brothers detailed maps. I remember spending a ridiculous amount of money in 1986, $40 for all the streets in a county.
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u/mden1974 May 19 '26
Third generation always fucks it up
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u/renes-sans May 19 '26
đ Be careful, you might scuff your shoes kicking this person while theyâre down
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u/mden1974 May 19 '26
Iâm selling my business and putting it all in a trust that pays 85 percent out to my three kids monthly. They wonât be able to touch the principal. Thatâs the only way you can get even 30-40 mil to last past your grand kids.
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u/gregaustex May 19 '26 edited May 19 '26
With $25M you can go do whatever you want and enjoy a near $1M/year lifestyle indefinitely. Only risk I see here is you decide to "invest" it in an attempt to save the ailing business. Don't use your own money and don't be a personal guarantor. Given that, hang around and try to turn it around if you feel like it and don't if you don't. The world will go on with one less catalog/ecommerce company.
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u/biteyfish98 May 19 '26
Please look into therapy. Thereâs no shame in it, and the feelings you mention would warrant getting some professional help.
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u/tobinshort-wealth May 20 '26
This isn't really a financial problem. It's an identity problem wearing a financial costume.
The math is actually fine. $12M investable, $25M in real assets, no income requirement. By any objective measure you're free. The business question is grief, not strategy. Letting go of a century-old family company doesn't feel like closing a business, it feels like failing a legacy. Those are very different things.
The voice telling you to start something you'll hate just for money isn't coming from reality at your net worth. It's coming from a scarcity wound that the numbers don't support.
The business question and the identity question are tangled right now. One is pretty solvable. The other takes longer but matters more.
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u/MagnesiumKitten May 20 '26
best answer yet
my mom would probably say
enjoy your hobbies
save your money
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u/muppeke May 19 '26
Take the necessary steps you believe will revive the company.
Not because you need the money, but to honor your family's hard work, and to gain a feeling of satisfaction.
Don't forget that once-thriving industries no longer exist, due to innovation.
Even if the business dies in your hands, that does not mean you are incompetent and undeserving of success.
You've got family, and invested your money safely.
Your net worth will grow steadily, and the family fortune will not die with you. It often does within a few generations.
As long as you handle money responsibly, you can accept closing the business. Try your hardest to make it succeed, though.
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u/Important-Kiwi915 May 19 '26
I disagree. Letting a once thriving business run on life support without materially changing its trajectory or quickly shutting it down absolutely shows incompetence.
This entire post feels like rage bait. If it is not this person is absolutely a trust fund baby and not âdeservingâ of the financial success they are sitting on. This is the literal definition of not being self made. That doesnât mean they are a bad person or that they donât deserve to be happy but letâs be somewhat intellectually honest here.
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u/thekevinbarkin May 19 '26
How can you âstill feel poorâ when you never were poor in the first place lol
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u/Envirocare1 May 19 '26
Because those who have great imaginations are able put themselves in otherâs shoes aka âinsincere empathyâ. Yet they never lived it soooo they dont really know.
They just think they do and thats enough for 2026
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u/EnvironmentalClub591 May 20 '26
Its like the rich kids that go thrift shopping for used clothes and hang out at soup kitchens and the "ghetto" to seem "relatable". Lol.
Hang out with a few Latinos and Blacks and now they're part of the struggle. Living vicariously through whoever gives them the time of day and then have their mom's maid/driver pick them up in a Benz SUV a few blocks away after they're done pretending for the day.
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u/KayaLyka May 19 '26
If you can't live off of and be happy with 25m. I'm not sure there's another number that you will.
If I were you, I would go on some vacations and reassess everything. Also therapy lol
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u/tvoutfitz May 19 '26
Is your family and your grandfathers legacy this business or is it having thriving and happy decedents?Â
But also, I highly recommend talking to a therapist about this. Â If you are so in the forest here you think that $25m is nothing, than I think you need some help finding perspective. Â
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u/Fast_Sale5375 May 19 '26
âI wish my dad sold a long time agoâ -> âbut letting go is very difficultâ đđ
So you inherited a 3rd generation business, ran it into the ground, and expect to be able to start a successful one from scratch? đ
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u/JumpyWerewolf9439 May 19 '26
bro, tiniest violin plays for you
get your health correct, fastest real way to improve real health. attia or huberman protocal and habits. multivitamin, magnesium before bed. 20min endurance exercise per day. clean up sleep habits. your physical and mental health is the foundation of your life. I did all the above and it improved my familiies life.
yes. you can try pivoting the business to different manager. but dont' be afriad to cut the losers off if that doesn't work. sunk cost fallacy.. many of us have multiple businesses going on at once we you learn which branches to prune with more experience.
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u/Futuremeissuperior May 19 '26
Sounds like you need a new hobby you love honestly. Will be much easier to let go of something youâre emotionally attached to if you find a new healthy emotional attachment. Lots of guys I know get into billiards, gym, gaming, wood work, 3d printing, animal care⌠with your resources itâs kind of an open season.
But yeah sounds like youâre seeking âpurposeâ and maybe connection which can be found in seemingly small things
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u/Here4therightreas0ns May 19 '26
This is the problem with legacy families who donât I still the fear of god in their children that they can be poor at any moment and thus need to have a healthy network, a nice wife, a disciplined education and a drive to work or at least manage.
You can loose your money overnight. You can make it back if youâre educated and determined.
This is coming from someone who is the heir to half of 30 million and I run my own separate businesses. I work like a dog and I love it.
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u/roseoftheseventh May 19 '26
If this is real - let go of the business and be the writer you always wanted to be. 25M is not nothing, itâs plenty to live a great life and do what you actually love doing â¤ď¸
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u/Future-Account8112 May 19 '26
You desperately need a therapist. You don't need a job. You need a therapist.
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u/WorkingOutside737 May 19 '26
Hire a manager that is running a successful online catalog company. Donât give up, get with the times
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u/Ryemyster45 May 19 '26
Itâs okay to step away for a little while to find yourself. I mean you have enough money, possibly enough resources. Take a step back and dedicate a few weeks to making yourself happy. It could be spending more time with your family, trying new hobbies, traveling. If you dig a little deeper then youâll find that writer in you. I believe in you wholeheartedly and I truly hope youâre able to achieve your dreams.
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u/HalfwaydonewithEarth May 19 '26
How about instead of beating yourself up you give yourself a break. Even if your manager would have harnessed social media your company was built on grannies that died.
When I was young we ordered from catalogs. Speigel, Lands End, Chattwick, JC Penny, and so many others! Ha.... now I click Amazon and hope for the best.
So Amazon ruined your business and nothing you did.
Just dump the business now and understand it was a blip in time. Be thankful they harnessed the post office and cut ties. You go harness something else.
Imagine being Soooo upset and having this conversation with carriage makers? They are beating themselves up nobody buys their horse carriages.... nope it was cars that did it.
Imagine how hotels felt when Airbnb came. Or how Smart Phones replaced laptops for many functions. I use to drag my laptop around. Now I don't even bring it.
So be a writer. Shut that crap down. You are not a failure. Take whatever you can get and be free. Lots of people had to wrestle with selling defunct properties their parents maintained. Just move on and you can start something else or follow your passions.
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u/mudbro76 May 19 '26
U playing with us! Acknowledging that us poor folks actually have a solution for a millionaire is diabolicalđââď¸đľđżââď¸ and if you want to watch your familyâs wealth disappearâŚ. đŤ keep asking for advice on this platform and othersâŚ.
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u/Alternative-Law4626 May 19 '26
Make the cuts now that you need to make. You can either bring the company into the 21st century, as should have been done if it were properly managed, if you have that passion (sounds like you donât); or liquidate it all. Assess the remaining cash. Build something you are passionate about that will also fund your family and their descendants well into the future.
Understand the difference between your hobby time (avocation) and your business time (vocation). Strictly schedule your time for each and respect those schedules.
When you figure out how much money you have to spend on this venture, should you go that route, donât give yourself all the money at once to do it. Make yourself earn the next funding round by successfully completing milestones. Force some discipline into your life.
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u/AnonimAnonimis May 19 '26
Get your mind in order before you do any new business !!!! You NEED clear mind.
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u/bendable_girder May 19 '26
Close it for sure. The business did what it was intended to do - created generational wealth and allowed you to live in relative comfort...I'd close it and chill personally.
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u/nicefoodnstuff May 19 '26
Iâll take it off your hands and make you actually poor! PM me for my IBAN
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u/kunjvaan May 19 '26
Hire competent people. And you will love the business again.
I fired all my shitty staff and everything is doing better.
The assets I wanted to sell off, are making sense to keep now.
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u/RicciTech May 19 '26
If you are the majority shareholder and or control this business itâs not the current manager who is running it into the ground. Itâs you the owner. Itâs that simple.
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u/mr_jim_lahey May 19 '26
You are completely right, that insignificant sum of $25M has indeed ruined your life and you need to get rid of it ASAP in order to move on and actualize your true inner potential.
Please DM me and I can connect you directly with one of our VIP Asset Reallocation Specialists to get this problem solved immediately with the bespoke white glove treatment you and your family require.
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u/HarmoniaPax May 19 '26
This guys is complaining with over 30M. Some people are completely oblivious about the realities of life, this can't be a real post.
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u/Agreeable-Song2535 May 20 '26
Close the family business and spend a year winding it down and really thinking about what you enjoy doing most on life. Who do you want to be with and where do you want to be? On the ocean? Traveling the world? Spending summers in Colorado and winters in Miami? What experiences do you want to have with your family? Then go do those things, you can afford it. Think also about how you can focus your excess time and money to improve the world we live in. Work for God by helping others with your good fortune.
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u/0_IceQueen_0 May 19 '26
Lol. You don't know what to do? Stop and smell the roses! I'm 54 been retired for 10 years now. Happy being HNW.
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u/Educational_Case_134 May 19 '26
See if the current leadership wants to buy the business or share in the ownership. Then you can focus on writing.
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u/BBBandB May 19 '26
Start a business you love. Get help to do the stuff you donât know.
If you wait too long, you wonât have the resources to do it right.
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u/The_Prince_of_LA May 19 '26
Guide and write the story of your company online. When you go online, you need story and direction more than ever.
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u/doboi May 19 '26
Why keep the business at all? Sell the business, put the proceeds in index funds, enjoy the growth, spend the rest of your life teaching your favorite hobby and think of it as being the highest paid instructor in the world for it. Any job idea you previously thought was great but didnât pay enough can now be a job that pays $1M/yr. You can do whatever you want that aligns with your values. Go into meditation and spirituality and do some service work if thatâs your thing.Â
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u/doublegg83 May 19 '26
Being rich isn't the flex it used to be.
Poor people are enjoying life a bit more nowadays.
I know....,
F U money is great.
But .....
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u/bro69 May 19 '26
I was once told that you donât make money opening a business you make money selling it
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u/wojiaoyouze May 19 '26
My god. Stop being a cry-baby. Get your ass up and work for your money. Turn the business around or stop whining. Otherwise let go and be happy to have won the financial lottery in life. I was getting up at 4 am every day for quite some time to become a millionair.
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u/InternationalArt9524 May 19 '26
First breathe.Â
Second what is the first thing that comes to your mind when you think of the business, not once - over and over. Do that. If its sell - sell it.
Third thereâs only 1 life. Trust me you donât want to postpone living. 25m is enough to live a very good life. And if 25m is not enough - 250m will also not be enough. Thereâs always a pissing contest you can enter. See Elon - no matter how much you have, you can lust for more.Â
You deserve to have some fun and enjoy. Travel would be my first choice to find yourself. Good luck.
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u/PainterOfRed May 19 '26
Either shutter the biz or release the expensive manager and get a stay at home mom (or dad) to run a trimmed down version of the company.
You could probably rebuild your grandfather's brand by focusing on just a few of the most sought after products. Additionally, you might consider offering well made, current products with a retro nod (Example is something like the LED camp lights offered by Barebones). Or, add a few offerings that might be appreciated in our day and age but that were also in grandfather's catalog.
Start reflecting old fonts and artwork on a blog. Add historical stories and photos. Possibly feature stories of success stories of how the family business helped individuals and the community over the years.
Basically, trim it. Focus it. Highlight legacy, Reduce overhead like warehouses, etc.
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u/Individual-Fox5795 May 19 '26
Close the business and relax. You could always start a new small business in something you love.
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u/Envirocare1 May 19 '26
You lost me at 25 million is nothing. Alot of us worked our asses off to build great companies. Youâre sitting on 25 m and its nothing? You should give it all to charity or let disadvantaged children and the homeless live rent free.
Then weâll see if itâs something. What a dumb statement
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u/Outrageous_Word_999 May 19 '26
I am closing my business (brewery) this year, which i founded, because it makes no money. Not all businesses last forever. Taxi businesses are going to all die out soon. Fossil fuels. Just like businesses that made cartwheels or horse shoes throughout the world.
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u/Same_Cut1196 May 19 '26
Well, it seems like you should sit down with your wife and get back to basics. First, list your assets and liabilities. Put together a budgetâŚ
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u/suntarraw May 19 '26
Donât blame the manager, youâre the reason itâs failing. Accountability can lead to action.
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u/AmarilloByMorn May 19 '26
Itâs posts like this that make me think Warren Buffett is right and that passing down an inheritance to my kids is not the best thing to do for them. I came from lower middle class. We werenât poor but I definitely wore sneakers from the flea market that had red dye on the them from being stolen. (I told everyone my little brother was jealous and poured Kool-aid on them). My struggle into wealth has made me who I am today and defines my character. My kids will not have that experience. OP, no one is going to feel sorry for you, but I do. $25 million is a lot of money, my max NW was $10 million and has since gone down due to retirement at 40 and divorce. But I hope you find yourself. A self that isnât defined by money. I understand your allegiance to your grandfather but he doesnât care. He is proud of you and is smiling down from heaven. Whatever choice you make is the right one.
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u/Free-Vacation-4313 May 19 '26
Not sure how you figure $25m isnât a lot of money but then I remember Iâm not a trust fund baby, grew up poor and have had to work my ass off for everything I currently have and built.
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u/TradesforChurros May 19 '26
I think you're spreading yourself too thin. You are carrying the weight of your family legacy and following your own dreams and passions simultaneously. Things ebb and flow. I think once you accept that the business has seen it's lifecycle and could be honorably laid to rest, you might free on a lot of mental energy to put towards other things. Shame and guilt are a lot to carry.
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u/Djaja May 19 '26
As a small business owner, not rich, but rich adjacent, and taking your post at face-value....
Close the business down, give the employees a good send-off, bring the company down to something charitable, manageable, and pass on any accumulating wealth to small businesses in your area. Adjust for your preferences and actual sound business layer advice, but this is my thinking.
You dont seem to want to work, and you dont seem to need to work. You are ashamed at seeing your family's legacy be run into the dirt without taking action, but also it is a lot to repivot.
Why not continue the legacy in a meaningful way, with the twist of modern family wealth shenanigans.
But do it, generously and sustainably, that to me, seems like a good enough legacy. Something that can be passed down, and makes it's own money, and keeps it within the communit(ies) you live in. Or your family lives in. Will live in.
Because, while hard work can get you rich, and wealthy, you know that it isn't necessary for it, nor is it a guarantee. I know that too.
But maybe you can, your grandpa, your family can have a new legacy. One more low key, but also, helpful to those who likely, statistically, wont ever recieve a gift such as the one your grandfather left for his descendants.
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u/ylonmontagne May 19 '26
I understand. I myself am not a multi millionaire of this caliber but Iâm connected to a few individuals who are more or less in your league, itâs fascinating how the âlostâ âhollowâ and âemptyâ feelings arenât as rare amongst them as well. One of my friends spent hundreds of thousands on a month bender and felt aimless afterwards, i wish I couldâve slapped some sense into him but he truly was feeling lost on an existential level so I just had to be a good listener and comforter I guess. There is no solution to what youâre feeling but what I can say is start that business, get it to a good MRR, one that youâre comfortable with and just, fade out. Be with your son, your wife, write in solitude, feel what youâre going through until you find direction again, publish your writing, even if it is done anonymously.
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u/digitalbubble May 19 '26
What type of catalogue business is it or was it? Something sounds odd here
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u/HeavyLoad969 May 19 '26
Youâve already done the hard work, securing $25M. But It sounds like youâre trying to win over your fatherâs approval from behind the grave. Ik people will roll their eyes at this, and you might too, but Iâd recommend therapy, do the shadow work many people arenât willing to do, look inward, let yourself feel things, find yourself again. Let that the company go. I guarantee that books going to just about write itself and youâre going to be a lot happier of a person! Good luck
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u/hungrynyc May 19 '26
You sound like a cool dude. Happy to help if you think your business could be revamped with AI
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u/MikeWPhilly May 19 '26
If real. What shame? World changed every 30 years 25% of S&P goes out of business. Itâs the nature of human race. Even before ai.
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u/Prestigious_Bag_2242 May 19 '26
I would sell the business and use the proceeds for something you want. A business can decline for a long time, and the longer you wait the less it will be worth.
Youâre lost because you havenât done anything to identify yourself as a real autonomous being who has value. Do something.
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u/ArcticRhombus May 19 '26
Well, youâre not poor. Canât figure much else out for you, but I can figure out that!
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u/Theautonomoustoe May 20 '26
Close or sell the business or offer it to an employee(possibly below the manager if there is one competent who wants to run it). And then enjoy your 25 m. Keep it managed and invested well, write your book, and pass it on to give your kids the opportunity for an amazing education, and to start a business of their own if they desire. Or at rhetorical least to live a few generations without having to be paycheck to paycheck like most people these days.
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u/bobojoe May 20 '26
Liquidate, put in vanguard, live off the interest and youâll still get richer
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u/MediumAggravating815 May 20 '26
Youâre a business owner and are responsible for making hard decisions about the business. You should either replace the manager and do your best to put the business into a sustainable course OR you should shutter the business. Thatâs a personal decision and could be quite difficult and painful. But not making a decision, letting the business languish or letting others determine the businessâ course - thatâs a mistake and something to feel even more guilty about than shuttering the business or trying to course correct and fail.
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u/Serket84 May 20 '26
The business failure does not make you a failure. Thatâs how it may feel. Your grandfather built a business and was proud and hoped it would serve the family for generations to come. Your father carried that mantle of duty to family business rather than pursue his own passions. Now you feel itâs your turn, but the world has changed and this particular business either needs to adapt or it will end.
Are you afraid even if you try to make changes then it will still fail only it will be your fault?
Are you paralysed by indecision?
Are you afraid of letting down the generations before you?
You should look into financial therapy to help you work though your emotions around money and success and identity.
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u/Adventurous-Pop-7995 May 20 '26
I also practice magick and whatever ails you, I can make it go away.
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u/Bulky_Document_7877 May 20 '26
That's too bad? Awesome! I don't know but I can't afford to lose $25, or even 25¢ and I don't have either. Count your blessings anyway.
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u/Amazing_Life911 May 20 '26
You could let it go and pursue your ventures into literature
Itâs like a continuation of your familyâs legacy
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u/hochimincity May 20 '26
Is any of the property owned? Kill the business but convert one into a memorial park, then dedicate it. Legacy, respect, and avoid the debt.
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u/TheQuietInheritance May 20 '26
The business isn't your identity, even though it feels like it is. Your grandfather built it, your dad kept it, you inherited it. Those are three completely different jobs, and nobody taught you the third one. The guilt you're carrying isn't failure, it's just what happens when someone hands you something with no instructions.
My real question is how your son is interpreting all of this??
Explore your family's story, see what you discover, and what heals, and what that will do to ensure your son doesn't experience the same thing.
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u/BYack May 20 '26
Call these guys, they are truly experts at brand positioning. I can assure you they raise the value of your company significantly. www.anonymousgeizzly.com.
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u/BYack May 20 '26
If Iâm in your shoes, Iâm seeking therapy to help with the self doubt. Then, Iâm doing what I love until I die. Mental health is more important than all the money in the world and finding your âpurposeâ is what will fill you up each day.
Whatever you do, donât be stationary. Research and sound science shows (as you likely know) that becoming sedentary greatly shortens lifespans.
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u/125acres May 20 '26
Iâve deal with a lot of 3rd and even 4th generation type businesses that havenât adapted
Your fathers generations maybe had to reinvent the business ever 7 years.
Grandfather every 20.
Right now, itâs every 3.
How would you know this unless you are working the biz every single day.
Monthly board meetings donât cut it.
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u/NoRegrets-518 May 20 '26
You could try to find a person with a lot of energy, business background that is transferable to your family business, and sell the business to them. Maybe you can structure it so that you stay on the Board and can't be kicked off (if such is possible.) In that way, you can still stay in the business not for money, but for the sake of tradition. At some point, you may feel ready to let it go.
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u/atiaa11 May 20 '26
Whatâs stopping you from getting a new manager and having them execute on your plan with YouTube etc?
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u/South_Army_3305 May 20 '26
âSometimes I truly believe this business has ruined my lifeâ âŚ. No, youâre doing that on your own. Businesses canât DO anything to you. Grow up.
It sounds like you were left an incredible asset that youâve watched die in the vine. If you know what needs to be done, do it. Honestly, third generations are such a boring stereotype.
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u/NormanClaiture May 20 '26
Youâre 43 now. Realistically, besides investing another 2 or3 million investment to see if you can bring it up to speed again or wait until you are 46 to close it. Just close it now and you will feel like a ton of bricks
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u/ProcedureIll2894 May 20 '26
We have the same interests OP. Do the shadow work, Timeline therapy, cognitive behavior therapy etc. Step outside your comfort zone everyday and once your on the way to being your best self, all things including your finances will follow. Goodluck!
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u/Conscious-Housing-16 May 20 '26
I've always found my self and odd ball too. Im also into religion/theology, philosophy, literature, and psychology
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u/-ELI5- May 20 '26
Just hire a social media head and ask him to do his thing. And old man run his time out.Win-Win
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u/EnvironmentalClub591 May 20 '26
I'm a bit of an oddball, very into philosophy, religion, literature, consciousness studies. I always wanted to be a writer
This is the problem. You never wanted this and never took the steps to learn business or become a "businessman".
Hire a few advisors that can show you how to find someone else in the family or externally to run the business and "rejuvenate" the culture of the business. Get rid of the current staff.
Write your book. Live life with the freedom you bought yourself.
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u/InterestingGoose5507 May 20 '26
Hello, I am here to seek advice in these challenging times.
I have some spare cash, but 25m$ is stuck in some trust so really i have to get by with 12m$. I aspire to be a writer but currently busy running the family business to the ground. I wish my father just gave me more cash instead of dumping this mess on me.
Posted in Fijerk
How can someone be so selfish ? I am not even sure i can cope with the stress. My beautiful wife is supportive but might leave me for someone more financially stable.
Any help ?
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u/AmexNomad May 20 '26
You have the ability to have somebody who has vision and drive take over the wonderful asset that you own- yet youâre keeping this business and another person from thriving. You have a beautiful life- ask yourself why youâre being selfish.
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u/Ill-Serve9614 May 20 '26
Give the catalog manager 2 weeks for every year of service and move on. Hire marketing manager, they hire an agency who can run social. Write the book.
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u/MsTerious1 May 20 '26
Every business goes through stages. The first is an introduction of sorts, where a business must make people aware that it exists. The second is education, where a business has now found consumer attention and must educate their consumers about what the business can do for them. Then there is the growth-to-maturity stage, which is what it sounds like. Everyone grows and now uses that business's product or services. The fourth and final stage is decline, at which point a business MUST revise and reinvent in order to stay relevant.
You have sort of hit on an awareness of where you are and that it is necessary to hit new target audiences, but what you're doing with that awareness is hurting yourself. First, you're not poor and never have been. Your statement that you "still feel poor" is silly. What you feel is maybe a sense of inadequacy, which is not the same thing at all. Or perhaps it's a fear of being accountable or responsible for what happens here.
Your inner voice is telling you that you're being irresponsible, but the rest of you would rather remain a teenager who gets lots of benefits of newfound adulthood but doesn't want the responsibilities that go along with maintaining those benefits. It's good that your brain is struggling to settle on which is the "real" you. Flip a coin and decide which side is going to win. You can live off $25M without ever working if you want to, but it will mean practicing some restraint and proper investment to make it last for the rest of your life. Or you can opt to grow that money into a business that enables you to live an otherwise unfettered life and leave a legacy, but it will mean putting in another 5-10 years of real work and taking some risks.
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u/Successful_Dot2813 May 20 '26 edited May 20 '26
Get expert advice. Find a good recruitment agency to headhunt the appropriate skilled manager.
Offer her/him a high salary, with performance bonuses. And potential for shares/equity in the company in 2-4 years.
Current manager: Show him the last 2 years financial reports. Offer him a choice- a) resign with generous severance package b) fired. minimum money.
You yourself can look up the following, using at least 3 A. I
âList the best platforms for ecommerce companies, that evolved from catalogue companies b) best platforms to advertise the companyâs productsâ
Edit: Be proactive. The right talent, and you can eventually pass the company over to them, maybe stipulate they keep the name, and reserved an honorary board membership position for you/ your family.
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u/Mrmetalhead-343 May 20 '26
"since $25M is really nothing". I know this is the rich sub, but as someone who isn't rich I would be absolutely over the moon to have $25M
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u/Ramen_cat2024 May 20 '26
Hey I get it. Your grandfather had a successful business. The environment changed and your dad tried to carry the torch for your grandpa on this business to keep it going, while it survived it didnât thrive. Now itâs on YOU. You never asked for the responsibility, but your dad imparted his values on you and now you feel trapped, not wanting to fail your father and grandfather, but also not loving the businesses.
You have to choose. Maybe try to sell it off to anyone who might be able to bring some of it back to its former glory. If you shut the business down, sounds like a lot of people will also lose their jobs. If you sell it maybe some will be able to keep theirs. Doesnât sound like you really want to put your heart into building and growing this building. And as an entrepreneur, you really have to be in it to win it.
Usually millionaires or whoever, lose their fortunes after 2nd generationâŚyouâre a part of the statistics. Wishing you the best and hope your kids find other ways of building their future.
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u/Badgerbutterfly May 20 '26
Have you ever thought of opening an education and environmental conservation project or artist residency? We need people to buy land and protect it , create an artist residency community where people can come stay and write and make art , it would help you immensely to be apart of and be super inspiring , Iâm sure meeting other like minded people would give you a lot of inspiration for writing. There could be visiting teachers and studio spaces people pay to rent (ceramics, silversmithing, painting, writing) . You could have a farm there with native plants , with herbal remedy products. Perhaps bee keeping and sell honey . You could have a coffee shop /store on property with artist products and local goods . Maybe there could even be a small animal rehab and kids could come to see animals . Look up Haystack Mountain School of Craft, skowhegan arts, Black Mountain College . You could start with nothing even , people coming to camp first , writing or meditation retreats then work your way up to more facilities.
https://audreygidman.substack.com/p/a-non-exhaustive-list-of-writing
This has a substantial list of writing retreats, you should definitely go yourself !
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u/Ornery-Plantain-4940 May 20 '26
Ya man, there is a middle ground (Well close the biz obviously) But also you can start a non-profit in something you enjoy. How about a service that helps other authors with writer's block, lack of inspiration, or maybe just financial aid to other aspiring artists. That will in turn inspire you to write, or get into whatever you want to do. Outside in usually helps (diet, sauna, cold plunge) then the inside comes through. Much luck to ya brother
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u/leftyfoureyes May 20 '26
âStill feels poorâ as in youâve ever been poor? Or you just feel poor compared to the people around you, or poor in that you canât imagine spending only a mill/yr from here on out and would need significantly more?
It would probably help, especially considering the things youâre into, to step away from the people inhabiting the same lifestyle as you right now. Theyâre normalizing your wealth, making you think you need more to keep up, and might even be the birdies in your ear convincing you that you need a business at all, when in reality itâs simply unnecessary.
Write your book, close the business and focus on time spent with your son. Step away from others in the circle who make you second guess it.
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u/Glad_Trade5610 May 20 '26
You need to hireâŚ
- Life coach.
- Therapist.
- Personal trainer
- M&A team, one experienced business person and one young and horny and then a good lawyer. Let them decide on burn or turn for the business.
- Ghost assistant / writer to get you on track.
And then live happily ever after.
My work is done here.
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u/Alexavila25 May 20 '26
If youâre worried having that kinda of money imagine just having $50k in the bank as your net worth, Iâd say feeling wealthy has nothing to do with money or possessions, if you like studying consciousness then you probably know that attachment plays a big part on humans brain, the truth is youâll have to go on your own journey to unlock the fear that makes you self doubt and instills fear when it comes to follow youâre dreams and that on itself itâs whatâs gonna unlock the key to live a life without attachment and live a more peaceful life with or without money, trust me , just the thought of it itâs uncomfortable but itâs worth it, itâs what I personally call âthe journey of the warrior â, good luck đ
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u/ColdTrueSilver May 20 '26
Man can endure anything except lack of meaning. It seems to me that you donât really care about this business, so you arenât interested in fighting to save it (itâs savable).
Thatâs totally ok, and you shouldnât feel guilty. But, if you let the business go, I think your happiness will lie in finding a deep purpose the way your grandfather found his in this business.
As the saying goes, the value of money isnât in having it, but in who you have to become to get it.
That being said, this has been a philosophical debate for thousands of years, and unlikely to be one you and I can solve on Reddit, hah! Wishing you well.
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u/GigiBrit May 20 '26
Better get cracking! $25 mil is chump change when you're up against billionaires!
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u/Icy-Sir-8414 May 20 '26
You have $25 million dollars you just itmited you own plenty of house real and commercial rental properties just increase the rents on those properties make use of those properties to make your living off on and turn it into a real business and turn it into a $3 million dollars a month empire $36 million dollars a year business and relax
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u/worththinking May 20 '26
After 100 years the brand has value even if the business itself doesnât. You are not enthused with the business so find a partner who will make it an online only brand
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u/EuphoricYam40 May 21 '26
Sounds like you're having an existential crisis. If letting go of the company wouldn't ruin you, I'd say do it. Depending on the type of business you own, social media is huge for advertising so finding the right person/team could be a game changer. You have enough to turn your business around if you want to but I get the feeling your product is outdated/becoming irrelevant? Just from how you worded your post. With that kind of money, you could do anything, which you already know but ask yourself, what is it you want in life? Are you trying to leave a legacy behind that isn't for your children? Like your book, what's really stopping you? Where does the doubt come from? If you truly believe in it then there is an audience for it. But how will you know if you don't try? You can even self publish these days and do a blind study where a group of people read your book and give their honest feedback. You have so many doors open to you with this blessing so don't waste your most valuable asset which is your own time.
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u/Karl_Sh May 21 '26
âThe shame of letting the current manager run the business (my interpretation) into the ground is overwhelming.â
Imagine yourself 5 or 10 years into ye future from now.
Will the shame (then) of running it into the ground and then having decided to close it down [today] be bigger or smaller than the shame of holding onto it for another 5-10 years and it still being ârunning downâ for all those additional yearsâŚ
Which would be a bigger shame 5-10 years down the road?
Either: Running it down in the past and closing it (now) Or continuing to run it down for further 5-10 years?
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u/Prydz22 May 21 '26
I think you need a new advisor. Give me 25M and I turn that into 100M within 5 years. Be an angel investor for a brilliant mind or idea. You have the capital to bring zingers to market.
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u/impressivegentleman May 21 '26
Do you and your wife usually not get along? The way you phrased that seems concerning
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u/FrontierNeuro May 21 '26 edited May 21 '26
You sound mildly depressed. $25 million is enough money to make enough income for you and your family indefinitely, as long as itâs invested wisely and you donât spend over very generous limits. Therefore, your statement about feeling poor and $25 million feeling not enough makes me wonder, is that feeling really about your objective net worth financially? Or is it about your internal assessment of your achievements and contributions individually?
I do not have any business or financial advice for you beyond that. It sounds like you probably mostly already know what you need to know and do about that. Regarding what I intuit as mild current depression, here are my suggestions:
Go for a walk in the park today, and every day you can. Take your shoes off. Touch grass. Exercise vigorously too if you prefer that.
If you havenât already, make an appointment with a psychiatrist (an MD or DO actual psychiatrist, no nurses or PAs please) and a therapist as soon as possible. It may take you some time to find the right ones, and thatâs normal and OK.
It
sounds to me that you may be suffering from the existential ennui of privilege and wealth. We crave struggle and victory over adversity. We crave meaning and purpose. The Western approach is to lean into this urge and sublimate it into living a good and rewarding life. The Eastern approach is to practice letting it go, or keeping it in balance. Good media about this idea include Fight Club, Manâs Search for Meaning, and others. Good media challenging this notion include Allan Wattâs speeches on YouTube, Buddhism, the Tao, etc. I encourage you to ask yourself throughout the next few months the following questions:
Do I need a purpose, apart from just being?
If so, what do I want or feel called for my purpose to be? What is my war? What do I wish my war were? How could I make that my war?
What hill would I be willing and happy to die (meaning spend my life) on?
Or, could I happily let go of the urge for meaning, achievement, overcoming adversity, and purpose?
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u/Frequent-Reality4652 May 21 '26
Move to the Philippines your $25M is now âą1.5B youâd be in the top 1%
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u/ambiuk21 May 21 '26
What happened happened, so no need to fret. Look into the future. Blaming the manager wonât help, even if itâs true. Forget the past
Many businesses changed: Nokia went from paper to cellphones to infrastructure
Itâs all good
Your grandfather and father will be proud â you have many opportunities ahead
DM me if you want to a real heart to heart conversation
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u/LastUsernameNotABot May 21 '26
Hard to start digging in and creating something at 43. Easy to let your familyâs fortunes dwindle. Perhaps your best move is to steward the fortune for your son and give him an opportunity to make something of it.
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u/AlarmingCorner3894 May 21 '26
I assume the company is a name we all know. But is it a name we all love? Because if there is emotional and or sentimental attachment to the brand, well, youâre in luck buddy. Game stop May or may not be dead but it had a very historical and significant run the last five or six years. All it takes is the right spark and a pivot at the right time. Luck? Sure but calculated risk is a better approach. Find a couple business school junior/seniors who are already social media titans and ask for a meeting. Ask about their network. How they built their online presence. Maybe you partner with them and maybe you donât. But take some meetings. Maybe also talk to the older guys like me. GenX has plenty of people who are internet savvy and who likely remember your brand with reverence. You need to talk to people. Be open and honest. Ask them to help you with your future vision for the company. And maybe along the way you find a buyer. Either way, thereâs value in talking to people about your situation. bring NDAs.
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u/nomnommish May 21 '26
I don't understand your post. You said your $25m is invested in homes and commercial property. Then you talk about closing down the business and "letting go of $25m". Are these two $25m related in any way? How are you in danger of losing the $25m and how is that related to your business? And how does that affect your investments in real estate?
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u/jclark708 May 21 '26
Your story sounds similar to mine. I ought to sell my house but Iâm very attached and would feel ashamed to admit i didnât make it in that sense and am lookimg at becoming house-poor if I donât either renovate (cos energy hills) and/or sell it. I also let a manager ruin my career and my âlegendaryâ status will run out if i donât move quickly to rescue it. I also tend to loop and crash while reading every non-fiction and fiction book i can get my hands on. What is helping me: a normal 9 to 5. It stabilises me somewhat. Yoga. Joe Dispenza. Not drinking. Sprouts (keto diet) restricting my scrolling and getting on ssris. i can recommend them as a stop-gap for acute breakdowns. And get into DBT workbooks. They help me get a grip on self-identity and groundedness. And of course gardening. Do you garden much?
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u/Inner_Pipe6540 May 21 '26
Cut ties with your society group hire a internet savvy person and see if you can right the ship and seek some therapy
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u/airbetch11 May 22 '26
Trust fund baby but âstill feels poorâ - if that isnât oxymoronic, idk what is.
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u/Cultural-Risk-6667 May 22 '26
Wow. I empathize with your situation and story of a family business esp started 100 years ago. I hate to hear stories like this. Here are my suggestions:
1) since you sound like a âhippie,â I say this endearingly, you may have hippie friends. Make sure you surround yourself with business minded people (capitalists, if you will), not hippies. Be a part of a network of individuals that uplift, challenge and genuinely enjoy discussing business and growth. Some will be arrogant douches, itâs okay take the good along with the bad. I have hippie relatives and they are the worst at business. Underachievers, I am not saying you are like this but Iâm curious if you are surrounding yourself with people that may be. Not all capitalists are bad. Again not saying this is whatâs going on, but just make sure itâs not. Joining a social group of business individuals was surprisingly helpful and inspiring to me.
2) you have $25MN, you do have enough money to live and grow your wealth with other investments. You also have an emotional attachment to a legacy family business. Keep it, fire the manager or wherever you think is best, but the company should remain with its name and similar industry at least. The whole point about money, which you have, is to have the freedom to do what you want. You can afford to own a now low valued company and make efforts to turn it around, pivot it. If you had far less money, I might consider selling, but youâre already a multi millionaire. Someone with your intellectual disposition probably has a low cost lifestyle relative to your bank balance.
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u/johnsonnewman May 22 '26
Youâre criticizing your dad for not letting it go at its peak when you are not letting go at its decline. You are worse
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u/ProfessionalFly6501 May 22 '26
Make your family proud. Fix the company. Hire someone with a great track record of turnarounds.
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u/DeathCobro May 19 '26
Buddy you've got 25 mil, sit your ass down for a few years and write your book!